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    KISS's Avatar
    KISS Posts: 12,510, Reputation: 839
    Uber Member
     
    #1

    Mar 14, 2009, 07:55 PM
    Top 5 Answers
    Top 5 Smart Answers
    Smart Answer #5:
    A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate
    To check tickets. A man approached, she extended her hand
    For the ticket, and instead he opened his trench coat and
    Flashed her. Without missing a beat... she said, "Sir,
    I need to see your ticket not your stub."

    Smart Answer #4:
    A lady was shopping for a turkey at the grocery store,
    But she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She
    Asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any
    bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am
    they're dead."

    Smart Answer #3:
    The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped
    For speeding rolled down his window. "I've been
    waiting for you all day," the cop said. The kid
    Replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I
    could." When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent
    The kid on his way without a ticket.

    Smart Answer #2:
    A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign
    Comes up that reads, "Low Bridge Ahead." Before he
    Knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck
    Under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a
    Police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks
    Up to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says,
    "Got stuck, huh?" The truck driver says, "No,
    I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."

    AND NOW... FOR THE... BEST ONE..

    #1 SMART ANSWER
    A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's
    Final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any
    excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a
    nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a
    death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other
    excuses whatsoever!" A smart guy in the back of the
    Room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if
    tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter
    sexual exhaustion?" The entire class is reduced to
    Laughter and snickering. When silence is finally restored,
    The teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head
    And sweetly says "Well, I guess you'd have to write
    The exam with your other hand.
    ChihuahuaMomma's Avatar
    ChihuahuaMomma Posts: 7,378, Reputation: 608
    Vision Expert
     
    #2

    Mar 15, 2009, 01:12 AM

    Here's your sign..
    KC13's Avatar
    KC13 Posts: 2,556, Reputation: 99
    Ultra Member
     
    #3

    Mar 15, 2009, 06:48 AM
    HA HA! #1 is great. Youth and skill are no match for experience and treachery.

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