[cnfsd in miami]

I've been in a relationship for almost a year and a half now with my girlfriend, and from day one, sex has been a problem. To sum it all up, there is no chemistry. No vibe, flow, we like and enjoy different things sexually, are turned on by different things, and it feel awkward or just not "right". But I know that I love her, I know that I want to be with her. I know what good sex is like. I am a very sexual, intimate and passionate person. But nothing we do seems to work. I've even had to take pills just to get an erection, but most of the time, I cannot ejaculate with her. I just don't want to. This is so hard, I want her in my life, but we don't connect. I am trying to see if the chemistry will develop, but after all this time, it hasn't. What do I do?

[smoothy]

You don't "MAKE" chemistry... if it's there it's there, if its not then its not and you really should move on.

You can't force a relationship, and people don't change their character so it's a waste of time to even try.

My recommendation is who you think is the right one really isn't the right one for a number of reasons. We've all been in this situation before.

[Choux]

Let me just say that we aren't supposed to have sex with everyone, or people we aren't hot for. Sex is about passsion, if it isn't there... you're friends, not lovers. Women who have sex too young or for all the wrong reasons start at a disadvantage in developing their sexuial prowess. Too much religion makes for trouble, too.

As people get older and mature sexually and get different and varied sexual tastes, then it is possible that we will be sexually attracted to more people.

Ya just can't fake passion--faking makes for a mechanical and dull sex life.

[bronzebabe]

I'm sorry you are having that issue. It seems that while you love her, and care for her, she just isn't "the one". Chemistry won't "develop". Time to go on, and move on.

[JadeSapphire-ox]

Aww :( I more sure you will find someone just as great and I wish you luck in finding someone you will have more sexual chemistry, although I appreciate it will be difficult moving on. I understand you can get quite attached to a partner. Oh well, just think of the passion you will get out of your next relationship!

[cnfsd in miami]

Thank you so much. Your words put me at much ease and helped.

[chrissymarie]

You just need to speak up. Give her some instructions and ask her to give you some during sex too. Express how important it is for you two to start having a good sex life if you wan the relationship to last. YOU NEED TO COMMUNICATE... verbally and physically.