Originally Posted by
heartbroke
Any updates hopeless? How are u feeling?
She called me Friday night "just to talk" while she was driving and then she txted me for a while on Saturday and towards the end sent a message saying she missed me. I didn't respond because I didn't know what to say. I feel like if she missed me this wouldn't be happenning. It's hard to think about everything and have a million different whys and what ifs run through my head. She tells me I'm the perfect man and it would be her loss if we didn't get back together so it baffles me why it seems she is in pursuit of her Ex. I know this girl like the back of my hand and she is not a liar and she never wants to hurt anyone. She has told me she doesn't know how long it will take her to heal but I really do not get how she will ever heal if she is takling to her Ex on IM all day long and instead of having the kids at separate time mostly, I know they have kept them together at her house. I think it's really good her Ex is still invovled in the kids' life like he is but it almost seems she is using the kids to get him back while still telling me all these things. I have moments where my mind is on something else and I'm OK but most of the time I just miss her so much. This girl has been my best friend for years so I've not only lost her as a girlfriend but I feel I've lost my best friend as well. I want to be mad at her hoping it would help me just get over it but no matter how hard I try I just cannot be mad at her. Even knowing that after everything she is doing God knows what with her Ex, I'm not mad... I just want us to be OK. I want to hold her and kiss her on the forehead and tell her how much I love her. Trying to get my mind off things I went out with some friends this weekend and all I could do was think about her and wish she was with me. My friends were joking you know checking all the women out and I felt bad that I was sitting there. I don't want to check out other women, I don't want anyone else. I know everything will get easier as time goes on, I just wish I could forward myself to that time. I miss every little single thing there is about her. I can't seem to enjoy anything any more. I sure hope this pain goes away quickly.
