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jessica1989999 · Feb 17, 2009, 03:52 PM

When men look at porn, are they picturing there self with that person or is it just for stimulation, because, I know this seems very naïve but when I think of my boyfriend looking at it I get jelous of the though of him imagining being with sum1 else.

Choux · Feb 17, 2009, 04:02 PM

They aren't thinking of their girlfriend or wife. :)

Alty · Feb 17, 2009, 04:13 PM

Men are very visual, women are more emotional.

Why do men look at porn? Because they can. It's the same reason dogs lick themselves. ;)

Really though, unless he's doing it a lot, needs it to get aroused, can't have a normal relationship because of it, porn is not an unhealthy part of our sexuality.

Maybe ask him to watch it with you, for some couples it can be a real big turn on.

Good luck.

DSM521 · Feb 17, 2009, 04:16 PM

Stimulation all the way, I have never pictured myself in the scean... that would be a total turn off.

smoothy · Feb 17, 2009, 05:03 PM

Guy like to see naked bodies... like some people like to see art. Its appealing to men, pure and simple. Has nothing to do with our girlfriends or wife. They can be Beauty queens that can show a porn star a thing or two in bed. A naked woman is a pleasure to look at.

BlueEyedSeeker · Feb 17, 2009, 09:05 PM

If he's watching it occasionally it's most likely harmless, and just arousing. I can see why you'd feel jealousy, but it's different for most men than it is for most women. It doesn't mean he loves you less.

LONE_DAD · Mar 13, 2009, 05:12 PM

A lot of men like to watch porn - women too for that matter. In my past the women I have been with enjoyed porn too, but were so insecure with (herself, our relationship, or something else). If I suggested it, it was suggested that I didn't get aroused by her anymore - but untrue. I just like to watch other people having fun and orgasming. My current GF is as much of a voyeur as I. I let her know, frequently, how attractive I find her; and I prove to her that she is sexy. The self-confidence that brings her allows her to enjoy porn with me. We will talk about the places our imaginations take us as we watch the wide variety of adult shows. There are so many things I think about while watching, but rarely (if ever) do I see myself on screen, though sometimes I get aroused by pretending that I am watching the woman I love enjoying herself (and others) on screen. My point is that when men watch erotica it is just because we enjoy being an audience (just as some enjoy having an audience). It is definitely not because we wish that we were doing it with the pretty skinny naked woman on the movie (she is usually bad at it and sounds like she is faking it - our GFs/wives do it better - its watching the 2 main body parts interact).

wotwotoldchap · Mar 16, 2009, 07:02 PM

It is a particular quirk of the male psyche to be primarily visually aroused and interested. Women are far more emotionally tuned then men and thus it can be rather upsetting for a man's female partner to know that her man is viewing pornography. Looking at pictures of other women does not always mean that the man is thinking of other women, but the problem is that it can mean this and the only person who can know this is the man who is viewing the images.

In a healthy relationship this should be discussed, and there are any number of solutions. Pornography can also develop into an addiction and thus must be treated like any other stimulant. My advice is that you talk about this together and always make sure that you are both happy with what is going on. Your sex lives belong to each other and should lead to each others pleasure and satisfaction.