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annsumm · Feb 17, 2009, 10:07 AM

I am 40, I have three great teenage kids and have been divorced for 18 months now. During this time, I have managed to finish my MSc, get a good job, and get my household in order. I feel I have done pretty well for myself and I am fairly happy with my life at the moment. I have a good circle of friends and family who have been very supportive. However, I can't seem to find a decent guy to put the icing on the cake, so to speak. I don't feel like I NEED a guy for anything but it would be nice. I am told I am young looking, pretty and have a great personality. I go out fairly often socialising, have had a couple of bad experiences that I have learned from and now feel like I would like someone special in my life. However, I seem to meet guys who are either too young, after one thing only or are already married/in a relationship. This, I think is also partially due to me having learned how to spot the non starters and what to avoid.

It gets me down a bit, usually when I am on my own in the house (that is, when I am reflecting on my life). I am not even sure what I am asking here but has anybody had similar experience? Or can anyone give a good suggestion on where, or even if, I might be going wrong? My friends say it will happen when the time is right and that I shouldn't worry too much, but time is ticking! Thank you.

Justwantfair · Feb 17, 2009, 10:13 AM

I have to second your friend on this. When the time is right it will happen. It is difficult to find something when you are searching SO HARD to find it, but life has a strange way of dropping something in your lap when you least expect it.

Hold your head high, you have managed to accomplish so many things in the eighteen months since the divorce and you still have teenagers who need your attention. Men will come, the right one will come along, just be patient. Keep getting out there and meeting new people. That is the best way to keep the process moving along.

kctiger · Feb 17, 2009, 10:13 AM

I truly believe that when you are constantly looking for something, you end up overlooking everything. Your friends are right, it will happen. You have something a lot of people don't have... you are truly prepared to love... now, while most people are lost, looking for something they ARE NOT prepared for, you, on the other hand, are ready for it, and that gives you an advantage... when the opportunity is right, you will know it, and you WILL NOT have to look for it.

While most people are out looking, you are simply enjoying, and that is the beauty of life. Just keep the faith, and continue on with your incredible life.

artlady · Feb 17, 2009, 10:15 AM

There are places where you can meet like minded singles.Taking a class that has always interested you.There would be no shortage of things to discuss.

Many people find on line dating to be fun,provided you do your homework.

It has always been my experience that when you least expect it.. Bam out of no where comes the one.
I would not presume that you are doing anything wrong... just hang in and check out some on line sites.It is not for the desperate only,many find it a way around the dating hassle.