[bnsmith]

OK so when my not quit husband looks at me or touches me I can feel the love. When I talk to others about what he means to me I can't stop from uncontrolable sobs. I love this man. Short history is first date was aug. 21 2007 moved intogether oct. 1 2007 we each have 3 kids from previous marriages and neither of us have ever felt this way or moved so fast and made so many rash way to quick impulsive decisions. Neither of us has looked back or regreted these moves.
OK so if I believe this why am I so insecure why do I think he's not happy or doesn't love me he was separated for 5 years and dated several women, never did he move one in let his children bond or put a ring on someone's finger. He has me! He tells me he loves me like he's never known possiable why can't I believe him. Well I do when he's here but when he's gone...
I even quit my management job March 08 so I could be a stay at home mom was that the right decision, is he only keeping me here because he feels bad for talking me into that and knowing that was my career and its gone am I here to do his laundry and feed the 6 kids or am I here because he wants my by his side his partner in life.
He is a flirt and has been since our first date, he likes to keep contact with exs and flirts with them. I love this man but should I trust him, he is one of a kind and the way he makes me feel I never knew was possiable! My insecurities are going to push him away how do I control this.
OR IS IT FOUNDED FEARS AND SHOULD I RUN

[Jake2008]

You have gone through some major adjustments, and maybe during all of this you have lost yourself.

A new mate, new family, new life, new responsibilities, new lifestyle. That is a lot to adjust to in a short period.

One of the biggest changes is changing jobs. Where you were used to your independence with your management job, both financially, socially, and intellectually, you are now in a totally opposite role as wife, mother, cook, housekeeper.

That caught my eye because when my husband and I had kids, I stayed home, and also quit a very good job. I didn't just lose the job, I lost the job friends, the routine, getting dressed up and going to work every morning, and otherwise interracting with adults all day long. The switch to stay at home mom left me all of a sudden with a huge gap in my life. When my husband came home I grilled him on everything from what he did during the day to what he had for lunch. I realized that I felt insecure because my life now revolved around him.

It sounds like he loves you very much. It might be time for you to get out of the house and do something just for yourself. Maybe get a part time job, just even a few hours a week. You may not make enough to pay the sitter, but your self-esteem and confidence will improve.

Just my opinion, but that is a tough job you are doing, and there has to be some balance there from the enormous task you have taken on.

[450donn]

Sounds to me like a major manipulator. He is using you for what he can get for free. He is able to manipulate you and your emotions. Sorry for that, but it is how I am reading your post.