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angle595 · Dec 30, 2008, 10:04 AM

I have never ever had an orgasm during sex I have only ben with one man so I don't know too much about it but I'm thinking its one of two things I'm not attracted to him or he just isn't doing something rite but I'm verry despret to find out the problem because I don't thiink I'm doing much good for him the bedroom but I think he's not worring about me too much I think he knows I don't feel good off it so he just hurrys up and gets off and doesn't even try to please me

complicatedlife · Dec 30, 2008, 10:21 AM

All I know is that if a guy cares about you he will do everything to make you feel better... and if he doesn't care he won't even try pleasin you/ look inside your heart if you feel that he doesn't worry about pleasing is because that's what he's doing other wise you woudnt be doubting it.

Synnen · Dec 30, 2008, 10:41 AM

Okay... MOST women do not climax during sex. Their buttons just aren't built that way.

If you can climax from oral or manual stimulation, I wouldn't worry too much about it.

chrissymarie · Dec 30, 2008, 03:56 PM

You need to speak up during sex. Communication is key. Focus on what feels good and tell him what you like and especially what you don't. Focusing on doing what feels good will lead you to having an orgasm soon enough. Remember your supposed to be getting pleased too. Take a stance!

Choux · Dec 30, 2008, 10:41 PM

From the way you worded your question, I get the feeling that you don't have a firm sense of self... that others have told you who you are and what to think. A woman knows if she is attracted to a man... a woman has confidence in her sexual abilities.

IN order to get a grip on your situation regarding your sexuality, I think you need to get a good beginner's book on female masturbation and take time three times a week to learn how to pleasure yourself to orgasm.

That will give you a lot of confidence, girl. :) Give you footing from which to see your present relationship for what it is.

Best wishes,

hamidrng · Dec 31, 2008, 01:59 AM

I think if you try to be on top and control the tings yourself,this helps you a lot

talaniman · Dec 31, 2008, 11:21 AM

You both have to communicate, and teach each other the way you want things to go, so talk to him. Before, during, and after sex.

smoothy · Dec 31, 2008, 12:04 PM

Incidentally how old are you. This does play a large factor into this.

mommyiggy · Jan 4, 2009, 06:39 AM

I believe that before you can expect someone else to please you, you have to know how to please yourself. Take time to find what really turns you on or what really gets you going. Then coach him. No guys wants to be given order in bed (well maybe some) but guide him to do the things you like and then say things like I love it when you do that, or ooh it feels good when you touch me there. In the moment a little whisper in his ear could work or perhaps a serious conversation afterwards. Either way sounds like you need to communicate with him about this. I like the idea that hamidrng had... get on top. The feeling of being in control may be enough to get you there. I sometimes forget that my hubby is even there in that position I almost lose myself in the moment. So give it a try... hope it all works out for you.

haribob · Jan 4, 2009, 09:04 PM

mommyiggy is write. I don't think this guy is write for you and I think you know it. You can do much better. I think is this relationship ended you would be devastated but it would be worth who you would eventually move onto.

smoothy · Jan 5, 2009, 06:43 AM

So how old is the poster? 16? 26? 46? It matters a great deal how old she is.