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gothicangel · Jan 3, 2009, 10:50 AM

I have the boyfriend of my dreams and I love him very much and he loves me!
Well at least he used to... My class says I'm green,I don't really care but I have a feeling they're right.By the way Green means too shy to hold hands or hug or kiss in public.
Anyway,I feel that if I don't hold hands with him,or hug him or kiss him I'll lose him.I see him always hanging out with his guy friends and checking out other girls.Like the in my class.:mad:How do I get him back?

N0help4u · Jan 3, 2009, 10:56 AM

I am confused if you are saying you are not together or you are together and afraid of losing him.
If you are together then you need to discuss things with him.

ja77 · Jan 3, 2009, 11:11 AM

Can you be a little more clear please.

How old are you and are you still with your BF or not?

bmc_imr4308 · Jan 3, 2009, 12:00 PM

You didn't really make your point clear but from what I got out of it, it seems that the two of you seem to be growing distant. The best thing for you to do is to just talk to him about it, and work things out that way. If that doesn't work then you shouldn't have to completely change who you are for one guy, its not worth it. In my experience with girls who have tried to change who I am it never works out. If your happy with who you are then and he doesn't like it then just leave him, you will find someone who actually likes who you are and the way you live your life, that is the type of man you want to be with.

starbuck8 · Jan 3, 2009, 12:01 PM

My sense is that you are very young. You are about 13 or 14. Am I correct? If I am not, please correct me. You are loving the excitement your fantasy "relationship" is giving you. I'm not saying you aren't having real feelings for this boy, but the thoughts seem to be more of a "idealistic" relationship. This is normal, and most young girls go through this. Boys do too, and to both of you it feels like it's a love that will last forever, when in reality forever feels like two months from now. You don't yet have the ability to see further than a few months into the future.

Don't let your classmates talk you into anything you are uncomfortable with. Just because they say you're "green," doesn't mean you have to follow with what they think is the right way to act with a boy. If you lose him by not holding hands, hugging, or kissing him in public, he isn't worth keeping. This is why a lot of young girls have sex! They think if they do that for him, it will keep him around. It will backfire on you every time if that's all you have.

There is nothing you can do to get him back, if he doesn't want to come back, but to be yourself and not change for others. Also, don't get mad at the girls in your class because he is paying attention to them. Even if they play along, it is him that is going along with it, and not the girls fault. I know girls like to play games and try and steal boyfriends, but if he is willing to participate in the game, you don't want him. Trust me you don't.

Whatever you do, don't play games yourself. Be confidant and refuse to play those games. You will be the one that wins out in the end, whether you end up getting back together with him or not! It will show other people, girls and boys, that you won't stand for it. You will get much more respect from not only this one boy, but other boys too. They will know that you are confident in yourself, and in the end that will be the only reason a boy worth keeping will stick around.

Set your rules and boundaries, and stick to them. Don't listen to the background noise.