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bronxrose · Dec 23, 2008, 11:04 AM

I live in Virginia, my child's father lives in New York. I have sole custody of my 12 yr. old son, I brought him to see his father because he left him years ago, he has been with him for 6 months, does this constitute abandonment? and will I have a problem taking my son home with me?

JudyKayTee · Dec 23, 2008, 11:12 AM

Originally Posted by bronxrose

I live in Virginia, my childs father lives in New York. I have sole custody of my 12 yr. old son, I brought him to see his father because he left him years ago, he has been with him for 6 months, does this constitute abandonment?, and will I have a problem taking my son home with me?

Who has physical custody of the child? You? Joint?

And, no, it's not abandonment.

bronxrose · Dec 23, 2008, 11:18 AM

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

Who has physical custody of the child? You? Joint?

And, no, it's not abandonment.

I have sole/physical custody, the court order has no visitation, no joint, nothing, just me.

JudyKayTee · Dec 23, 2008, 11:47 AM

Originally Posted by bronxrose

I have sole/physical custody, the court order has no visitation, no joint, nothing, just me.

Then you have absolutely control - the "ex" may kick and scream but under these terms, he will lose.

When you go to pick up your son, take a copy of the Order with you.

bronxrose · Dec 23, 2008, 12:04 PM

Thank you JudyKay, I already have the court order in my car. I was just a little afraid of the time span, not really sure if it would make my custody papers null and void. :)

JudyKayTee · Dec 23, 2008, 01:15 PM

Originally Posted by bronxrose

Thank you JudyKay, I already have the court order in my car. I was just a litttle afraid of the time span, not really sure if it would make my custody papers null and void. :)

The only thing that can change a Court Order is another Court Order (or somebody drops dead - :). You're good to go.

And I'm actually in NY - Police (should your "ex" decide to go that route) refuse to participate in these disputes when there's an Order in place - and usually when there isn't an Order in place. It's civil, not criminal.

Fr_Chuck · Dec 23, 2008, 04:23 PM

Yes, at least where I am from, and in other states, the police will not do anything to enforce your court order.

He could call the police on you for trespassing if you won't leave his property when ordered.
I had a somewhat similar issue some years ago in Texas. I have a MO court order giving me custody of the children, went to Texas she would not give me the kids, she called the police, I was hauled off in a police car for tresspass and some threats she claimed I made. Had I not worked for the US Justice Dept in a law enforcement role (had the badge in the car) most likely I would have a record by now.