[bowdishgirl]

I'm 13 and I'm TOTALLY in love with my boyfriend tyler... well ex-bf. He and I were going out for a while and then about a week ago for no reason he broke up with me. I'm a mess and I'm losing all my friends because they say I'm to depressing to be around. I have NO IDEA what to do and I REALLY need help!

-Depressed & Confused-

[CarlyTD]

Well... my first reaction is to suggest you get over it. Chances are it won't be the last time you get your heart broken.

But having been there that advice isn't very helpful - actually it sucks.:)

Two things that helped me...

1. You have experienced a loss. So grieve. Hurt, be mad, bargain, and then accept. Nothing will undo the break up, but time really does make it better. And when you finish grieving and things are better, you are a better, stronger person.

2. One of the things that I figured out was that my ex made me happy. I realized that that was wrong. I should make myself happy. He could contribute to my happiness, but making him solely responsible for my happiness was not fair to either of us. There is an old movie called The Sound of Music... get the soundtrack and listen to "My Favorite Things" over and over. It will come to you.
:)
And with your friends, being around people is important. They are being honest with you and telling you how they feel. That's a pretty good friend. So try to make things a little better with them, slowly. Say you hang with them for an hour and you mope and whine about your ex for the whole hour. Maybe then next time you are with them, make an effort to do something fun or tell a joke or just pretend to be happy for 5 minutes, then then next time 10 minutes... don't go cold turkey but make an effort.

Eventually you will be back to your old self (just better).
:)
I know it means nothing when you are in the middle of it, but sadness is an important emotion. You don't have to forget the pain, but you need to remember no matter how bad things are, they ALWAYS get better. Just hold on tight until the storm passes.

Good luck.:)

[babyshooter11]

I'd definitely suggest getting over him. He's not going to be the only person you love in whole entire life. Trust me there will be more as hard as it sounds there will be more.

Your not alone. Lots of people have been where you are I've even been there in fact I experienced my first heart break when I was your age. It took me over a year to get over him but that's because I made some very poor choices and bad mistakes.

One mistake that I made was I convinced myself that one day he would come back. NEVER EVER EVER do that to yourself. Accept the fact that he's gone and don't expect him to come back no matter what! Even if he promises he will.

Another mistake that I made was I talked to him after we broke. That's a very bad idea to. Trust me. Cut all ties that you have with him even if you guys agreed to be friends. Do not talk to him unless you can talk to him and see him honestly as nothing more than just a friend. This make take months and it gets really hard but you have to keep pushing through.

Grieve about it. Cry you eyes out. It's OK. It really is. The worst mistake I made was I went in denial about being heart broken. If your sad then be sad. If you happy then be happy.

Good luck. And trust me there will be more.