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Johnsgirl · Oct 23, 2008, 01:17 PM

My baby's father and I are unmarried and he did sign the birth certifacate and aknowledgement forms. My daughter is 9 months old and lives with me, I support and take care of her completely. He has given me 200 in 9 months. I was just wondering if we haven't gone to court who has custody of my angel? Can he just go to her school one day and take her legally and be gone?

Johnsgirl · Oct 23, 2008, 01:19 PM

Also we live in VA

cdad · Oct 23, 2008, 01:20 PM

Until there is a court ordered custody on file then the child is both yours. So can he go and pick her up from school.. yes. He has as much right to his child as you do.

Johnsgirl · Oct 23, 2008, 01:23 PM

What if I didn't let him leave with her and he called the cops would they take her from me and giver her to him? I don't see this happening since he doesn't even care enough to ask about her but he gets vindictive when I do notwant to be with him. I don't want to risk him taking her, he is a alcoholic and got a 2 yer old drunk before.

cdad · Oct 23, 2008, 01:32 PM

What you need to do is go to court and file for support and custody. You really need to clear this stuff up because as I had said the police would have to assume that since he is on the BC then he too is the parent of the child. And unless the court has ordered something different then they don't really like to get involved in domestic squables.
So your best option is to stop with the worrying and headgames your playing on yourself and get a lawyer and file right away.

Fr_Chuck · Oct 23, 2008, 06:27 PM

He has just as much legal right to take the child as you do, You can not stop him from leaving physcially if he was in your home and picked up the child and started to walk out, that would be assult on him and you would go to jail.

So you need to go to court and get a child custody order and a child support order.

cadillac59 · Oct 23, 2008, 10:52 PM

If the dad signed a pop-dec (voluntary declaration of paternity) then he is treated as a legal father (it's the equivalent of a judgment of paternity) so you both equally share legal and physical custody in the absence of specific orders saying otherwise. He can take the child, yes, but he must still advise of his amd the child's whereabouts amd all of that. To hide her from you would be a crime (possibly parental kidnapping) so you are somewhat protected from that sort of thing. There are also a lot of things you can do to prevent him from leaving the state with her so you should seek legal advise in your jurisdiction (I gave a synopsis of California law which may or may not apply in your state--it's probably pretty close, however).