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    grace martin's Avatar
    grace martin Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jul 27, 2008, 04:47 PM
    Custody and court orders
    I am was in abusive relaitionship and thought it was best to remove myself from the situation for a while I am pregnant with number five to the father of my other three kids he left for australia 2 weeks ago I have been told about counselling and other things to help me get my marriage together I have been sucicidal since him leaving his family are controlling how we speak to each other which we are not allowed to do if I ring or email there place they will ring the police I want my family back and for us to do counselling I have forgiven him and want to know how do I apply for full custody of my three kids and get a summons for my husband to come back and do court counselling. He was arreseted in April for viloence in front of the kids I have forgiven him and am not coping with out him how do I court order him back to do counselling and anger management for the sake of our children. What rights do I have as a mother to make this happen and summons him back from australia or do I give him time to think about it while in the mean time he plays with my head .:confused: :confused: :mad:
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #2

    Jul 27, 2008, 05:10 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by grace martin
    I am was in abusive relaitionship and thought it was best to remove my self from the situation for a while i am pregnant with number five to the father of my other three kids he left for australia 2 weeks ago i have been told about counselling and other things to help me get my marriage together i have been sucicidal since him leaving his family are controlling how we speak to each other which we are not allowed to do if i ring or email there place they will ring the police i want my family back and for us to do counselling i have forgiven him and want to know how do i apply for full custody of my three kids and get a summons for my husband to come back and do court counselling. He was arreseted in april for viloence in front of the kids i have forgiven him and am not coping with out him how do i court order him back to do counselling and anger management for the sake of our children. what rights do i have as a mother to make this happen and summons him back from australia or do i give him time to think about it while in the mean time he plays with my head .:confused: :confused: :mad:

    I do not know where you are but I do not know any Court that will force him to come back to you. They will order support, they will make an order concerning custody - but they can't make him come back to you.

    You should also talk to a mental health care worker if he committed an act of violence in front of your children to the extent that he was arerested and you have "forgiven him" and want him back - your children should not be subjected to this behavior.
    stinawords's Avatar
    stinawords Posts: 2,071, Reputation: 150
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    #3

    Jul 27, 2008, 05:17 PM
    If you are in the US it istn't going to happen. As judy poitned out they will order support and will make a custody order (which is best) but they won't make him come back to you. Have you filed for divorce yet? At the same time as that they will do custody and support if you haven't filed for it already.
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
    Internet Research Expert
     
    #4

    Jul 27, 2008, 06:22 PM
    If you have the kids then maybe best to do nothing at this time. In most places if he doesn't support his family obligations then that will be considered abandonment but only after a long period ( 6 months to a year ). Then you can file for full custody and a divorce at the same time and he should be paying child support.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #5

    Jul 27, 2008, 07:14 PM
    No, you are not going to force him back, what you do, ( and need to do) is file for divorce. And you need to get counseling. Do you hear yourself, you can't email without them calling the police? ( do they have a restraining order? ) You are a abused wife, you do not need to go back, you need counseling to learn to stand up for yourself
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #6

    Jul 28, 2008, 07:11 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck
    no, you are not going to force him back, what you do, ( and need to do) is file for divorce. And you need to get couseling. do you hear yourself, you can't email without them calling the police ?? ( do they have a restraining order ??) You are a abused wife, you do not need to go back, you need couseling to learn to stand up for yourself


    And if she won't protect her kids from this man, from watching her being abused in front of them, from him turning his abuse toward them, then somebody needs to step in to protect those children (particularly if she can't or won't).

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