[Ruchee]

My husband crossdresses. I caught him in my dress once when he confessed that he is not gay. After that, he has been testing my wits dressing and acting all feminine. I feel so disgusted. I feel as if I am living with another woman. Although he hasn't been out of closet yet, he still has online profile as a girl. I chatted with him as a guy and after a few chats, he was almost flirting as a girl. When I asked about this to him later, he said that he was trying to feel his "feminity" and he is not a gay. What should I do?

[N0help4u]

You either live with it or tell him you are leaving.
Cross dressers are not necessarily gay but it seems like he does have some sort of motive for it if he is posing on the internet as a girl.
You say you chatted with him as a guy one time?
I take it he didn't know it was you. What did he seem to be coming across like?
A girl wanting to pick up a guy? A girl wanting whatever 'she' could get?

Maybe ask him why it seems so important to feel his feminine side instead of getting more in touch with his masculinity?

[Ruchee]

Well I chatted with him several times. I forced him to talk about sex. After a few times, I initiated the adult talk. I commented on how feminine he looked and stuffs. The first time I did this, he was modest. But, in subsequent chats, when I asked him to comment on me (I had uploaded a photo of a male model) and if he would submit himself to me as a girl, he said he is very submissive and then admitted that he had wondered what it feels like to be a girl in bed. Although he said that he can't do this because he is married, he did say that he would like to submit himself as a girl to a man. Later when I asked him in person (after letting him know that it was me who chatted with him), he said that he was just "playing the part" of his alter ego.

[N0help4u]

Sounds like he is wanting to do fantasy type stuff but it can lead to more the more comfortable and addicted he gets with it.

[smoothy]

Cross dressers are rarely gay, and they rarely look for guys to play woman with. Now I can't personally understand why a guy does that any more than I understand a woman that dresses up in guys clothes.

It's a fantasy he has... but take some comfort in that it doesn't involve cheating or worse. I can understand how it upsets you so don't misunderstand what I'm saying.

[Choux]

Cross dressers are not known to be gay, most of the time.

You are going to have to negotiate this situation in your marriage so he gets what he wants, and you get what you want. :)

Whatever you do, don't let this turn you into a complainer. Either negotiate or get a divorce.


Best wishes, :)