[RaineAndrews]

I recently got back from Iraq to a nine month old daughter who I'd only seen when she was two months old. I knew that it would take time for us to bond, but its already be two months, and she is so attached to her mother.

It doesn't help that my wife stays at home with the baby (no easy feat I might add), and I have homework, and school that keeps me away for at least 8 hours a day. But when I try to spend time with her, she won't choose me when my wife is available to choose from. It isn't that she doesn't like me, because after a fifteen minute cry-fest because mommy left her with daddy, she is fine as a flower.

I guess what I need to know, is how to encourage her to play with me when my wife is home. She is 11 months old, and very smart for her age, but I can't seem to connect with her whenever her mom is home. My wife doesn't try to hog the time, its just my daughter won't choose to spend time with me, and instead nag on her mom to entertain her.

[Fr_Chuck]

It would most likely be that way if you had been here the entire time, esp with her being a stay at home mom.

[godsbabygirl267]

I am not sure what it is about baby girls but they have a tendency to prefer their mother to their dad. I wasn't like this but most girls are normally closer to their moms than their dads. You could try playing with her more while the mom is there and what I did to get my baby brother used to me when I visited him the second time when he was 6 months old was at bed time after his bottle, I would rock him in the rocker and sing him a lullaby. Now, most of the time I am there he comes right to me and bops me on the nose. It's a game and he's the sweetest baby. Sorry off topic but try singing to her and reading her stories, these are ways to stimulate the brain which babies know is a good thing and they try to surround themselves with what they think is safe and good. Hope this helps

[kellylynn]

My husband was gone for a yr in iraq & our little boy was only 6 months old. When my husband got back our son was 1 1/2. it was VERY hard on my husband because our son wanted nothing to do with him. It takes a lot of time. He was been home now for a little over a yr & our son is just now getting attached to him. You have to be patient & just try to bond with her as much as possible eventually she will want you over mom. I promise! It got so bad with us that my son didn't even want my husband talking to touching me. He would cry out.. just give her, her space & let it take its time.
Good luck!