[brownes88]

Hi everyone,

First of all thanks for reading and I really hope someone can shed some light for me. I'll try not to take too long writing this. I have just recently broke up with my boyfriend of 11 months, really not too bothered, treated me really badly so the relationship was over a long time ago. So I'd started seeing this amazing guy pretty much since my ex left so he'd text me every day, bring me up to his house and cook me dinner and I'd stay there, go pictures all that kind of dating stuff! Like last week he stayed in my house on Tuesday and Wednesday. Anyway everything was all good apart from this weekend. I met up with him on Friday night so I stayed in his house on Friday then I left Saturday morning (well about 2pm!) I texted him later to see if he had recovered etc and I didn't get a reply so that was fine. He came to the house later but me a friend went to the pub so we came back a couple of hours later and he pretty much ignored me the whole night... he was really quiet with everyone though but I tried talking to him a good few times and got nothing back. Then I went to the petrol station across the road to get smokes and didn't even realise that he was behind me in the queue... strange like he didn't even say anything to me. Then later he just up and left, I was sure that he was staying. So Sunday I woke up and there all out the back (sorry he is friends with a couple I live with, that's how I met him) so me and my housemate went out the back and were just chatting between ourselves, he made no effort to talk to me, said a few things but that's it?? Then this hits me, one of his mates that lives in the house with me asks him "so when is the mrs coming over???" now he had told me that he had a girlfriend back home (she's from France) but he said that he was now single and she was suppose to be coming over but not anymore but when his mate asked him that he goes "I don't know what the story is" he put his head down and said no more. I was gob smacked, I looked up and a few of his mates were staring at me cause they all know that we've been kind of dating y'know so my head is all over the place now! I really want him to text me and he hasn't, it's really odd, he always always texts me during the week about 10 times a day. And I swear everybody else is texting me today apart from him and every time it vibrates I think it's him (no other day will anybody text me! So annoying! ) he's really really nice too, treats me so nicely! So I don't know what to do now, will I text him or just wait to see what he does, what do you think?? :-(

[ylaira]

Sounds like he's married or has an unfinish business wfrom his recent relationship and on a rebound with you.

Distance yourself, don't be a clingy and quit sleeping with him.

Are you sure he's a bachelor and not currently having a divorce in process?

[brownes88]

Hi, thanks for answering! No he's definitely not married or getting divorced. He's only 22 and in Australia on a working holiday visa, I'm the same and were both from Ireland. I'm pretty much on the verge of texting him now just something light hearted, when or if I see him again I would like to have a chat with him to see where he stands so if the ex/girlfriend is coming to Australia well then I'd know where I stand and it would put my mind to rest and I could move on but do you think I should wait to see if he gets in contact first. I've seen him everyday over the weekend and pretty much all during the week so I was thinking it might be moving too quick for him. It's just so odd how things can completely change so soon, I've never had this happen to me before!

[ylaira]

How long have you been going out?

[brownes88]

Only a month, not too long at all but I've fallen for him pretty hard. I've known him for about 5 months though not very well though. He knew the crap I went through with my ex so I can't see him going out of his way to be nasty to me. He was the one that actually saved me. My ex was going off one night screaming abuse as usual, smashing the place up so he brought me back to his place and I've been seeing him ever since. So in a way I look at him from saving me from what I went through with the other guy. What I was thinking was that maybe if I left texting him for another couple of days so if he is going through any crap I'll just give him his space then I'll text something lighthearted and see if he wants to catch up then if I don't hear anything then I'll know where I stand or do you think I should just wait it out - maybe if I show that I'm not clingy and hounding him he'll get in touch. The thing is too though is that it was never me asking him out, always him calling me, it was always him that got in touch first, I just played it cool and I did think that we were just having fun but now after this weekend, I realised how much I actually do like him, men I tell you, we'd be so much better off without! :)

[talaniman]

Are you kidding me, your in deep with this stranger, after only a month. There is no telling what his story is but you sure should find out! Don't your room mates know anything about him?

[brownes88]

Yeah my housemates know him really well, they all grew up together so I know he's a good bloke. I'm friendly with them but I wouldn't dare ask them what they think cause I know it would get straight back to him but I think I've decided what to do. If he doesn't text me by tomorrow I'll text him, just something light like "hey, how's it going? haven't heard from you in a few days, everything ok? if your not busy wanna catch up?" something along those lines then if I don't hear back I'll just leave it at that and won't bother any more but if he does and we meet up again, I'll have a chat with him then. How does that sound?

[N0help4u]

Yep sounds like he was getting what he could while he could and now he knows the game is up. Forget him and if he does call you and try to 'work things out' tell him you want to know everything and tell him if you don't feel like he was all up and up with you you WILL ask his friends. At the point you tell him you will ask his friends then it is that you DID warn him so all is fair.

[brownes88]

Hey guys well I broke down and texted him today, just light asking him if he wanted to catch up later, got a reply saying he couldn't tonight because he has to bring his friend to the airport (I know this is true cause his friend lives in my house) so hopefully we'll meet up on the weekend and I can have a chat, so wish me luck! :-)