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sweetypie1 · Jul 30, 2008, 08:34 AM

My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 2 years and he's going away to school in August. His School is only 3 hours away. I might be attending the same school next year I just have to finish high school. Everyone is so happy for him, including me but I don't want him to leave. Is that so wrong of me? I read some messages of his and he told one of his friends going to the same college that he wants his friend to introduce him to hott girls. I wasn't concerned about it until now since he is leaving in 3 weeks. I trust him, but sometimes I have doubts. I haven't said anything about it to anyone except my close friend and he said just have faith. Should I say something to my boyfriend? I don't want to end things because of something he could just be joking around with. Is it hard to maintain a distant relationship? Should we try and work it out and see what happens? Should I ask him if he see's me in his furture or just wait things out?

talaniman · Jul 30, 2008, 09:09 AM

You have many questions. And you and your b/f really need to talk. I can tell you long distance relationships are hard for the most mature adults, to maintain.

Can you work together is the question, to get through this. Talk it over, and be honest, and realistic.

JBeaucaire · Jul 30, 2008, 09:17 AM

Yes it's hard to maintain a long-distance relationship.

You two are going to be in different geographies, but you're also going to be in different places mentally.

It's not wrong for you to fear him going away. But in the end it is pointless. It's going to happen.

Further, since you will be leading separate lives, there is a real possibility his going to college will mark the end of your relationship, whether you two admit it now or not.

It's hard (not impossible) for a HS girl to compete with a campus full of college girls. That's nothing but truth. Do you really NEED to compete with them?

It is so hard to maturely face inevitability, but maybe you're that mature. Can you let you guy go to college and let him know you'll be OK whatever he decides? That statement needs to be true.

It would be so sad to see your Senior year ruined by things you cannot control because you're trying to keep things the same, when they are some completely NOT the same.

My suggestion is that you let him go to school, stay in contact, but prepare your mind and heart for what is the most likely result, he will move on with his life at school as you do the same in HS.

It would be great if you two could make this next year one that is LESS stressful and real, instead of ignoring reality. Perhaps after a year apart and you arriving on campus next year, things may be just great between you.

But you need to be OK either way. Think about it.

Romefalls19 · Jul 30, 2008, 09:52 AM

You keep posting the same type of questions, if it's going to be this big of a deal. Simply end it

Tuscany · Jul 30, 2008, 10:01 AM

Communication is the key to any relationship. Long distance relationships can be tough, especially when college is involved. Talk to your boyfriend, discuss your concerns, find out what his thoughts are. Surviving college is doable. I was in college when I met my husband we survived a 3 year relationship where I saw him on weekends only.

Romefalls19 · Jul 30, 2008, 10:01 AM

Please use the reddies the way they are designed to, not just because you don't like the advice given to you in the first 3 questions you asked

KissMe10der · Jul 30, 2008, 10:01 AM

Sweetypie, you came on here looking for advice. Accept what others opinions are.. or don't ask.

Romefalls19 · Jul 30, 2008, 10:04 AM

Kissme, my only problem with her post.. It's been the Same problem as she has posted 3 times before... she hasn't liked the advice received on the other posts so she starts a new one.

To the OP

If you are looking for someone to agree with you and tell you to keep going, find a new forum. On here we are honest, sometimes brutally honest(Tal ha ha! ) but it's the advice you NEED to hear, not what you want.

KissMe10der · Jul 30, 2008, 10:04 AM

You started dating in high school, people change when they are in college.

Whether it works for you or not.. but me I kick myself for having a 4 year relationship in high school to have him go to college before me.. and decide we aren't right.

KissMe10der · Jul 30, 2008, 10:09 AM

True rome, She is asking for OUR advice... From whatever we pull it from, rather from experience or knowledge... etc.. BUT this is what we think, we aren't in control of her life.. no matter what we say she is going to do what she wants.

ScottGem · Jul 30, 2008, 12:16 PM

Separate threads merged