[ajhastings88]

There you go.

[guttedone]

I'd say that you have good reason to be suspicious of the other guy and I wouldn't be surprised if she is getting close with him.

What you should do is completely sack her and move on, when girls say things like 'give me time' and all that rubbish it basically means you are dead in the water, what she is doing is trying her luck with the other guy and keeping you dangling in case she needs something to fall back on, however that's only if she can get over her guilt from cheating on you which is why she is saying its unlikely you ever be bf/gf again.

She doesn't value you and is showing you no respect so move on mate and find someone that actually wants to be with you and treats you well, and also do what I did and promise to stick to the golden rule, 'only give them one chance!! ' if they give you cause for concern and effect you so much that you have resorted to help forums you need to sack them, trust your gut instinct! It is a natural warning system and is rarely wrong, if they lie to you or betray you once they are not trust worthy and will do it again!

[Sikativ]

Guttedone is right, I have given someone a second chance and for some people it may work out but for me it sure didn't. It ate at me for the months that her and I were together before I finally said NO MORE! The break up was smooth and she understood but you don't want to waste your time not knowing if you are happy or not with someone.
The answer of being happy or not with someone should be instantaneous and never "well im happy sometimes".

Anyway, you need to enjoy your trip, you've got things to do, people to meet, places to go, etc.
Don't let your feelings for this girl long gone get in the way of making new beginnings.

-Sik

[limeneko]

Hope she's not just saying that to think of me as a back up, almost 3 years and I love her so much.

[talaniman]

hope shes not just saying that to think of me as a back up, almost 3 years and i love her so much.

She doesn't love you though, now what? Oh right, if she would just let you run your lame a$$ rap from your heart, she would see the error of her ways and go back to her goody bar.
Man up, you can cry later, you have a life to get together.

[Sikativ]

hope shes not just saying that to think of me as a back up, almost 3 years and i love her so much.

She could be dipping her feet in some water that's new to her regardless of what she does you need to worry about yourself.
And don't think of it as being selfish. There is a difference between being selfish and looking after yourself.

Just do what you have to do like tal said.

[sandra6]

I agree with what most of them has said, I think you need this business trip more than ever, as he will clear you mind of what she is doing. I really do think she is moving on. I leaving you behind. I feel really sorry for you mate because you love her so much and she is giving no signs of it back. Don't get in touch with her let her come to you.

[limeneko]

Well if she's really moving on with some other guy then there's nothing I can do. But I probably won't get into any relationship for a good while.

[ajhastings88]

well if shes really moving on with some other guy then theres nothing i can do. but i probably wont get into any relationship for a good while.

that's what you think, that special someone is on her way as we speak. Remember that.

[damaged]

Don't worry about if she is moving on or not.. worry about you... Right now she is not with you, so start living your life and stop worrying about hers.. Its going to be hard but like u said, there's nothing you can do to make her change her mind...

And about not getting into any relationship for a while that's find.. Take some time for yourself and enjoy your new life... When you feel ready, you can try dating again... Its time to take care of you!!

[limeneko]

Wow I'm going furious now. She blocked me on msn and aim, and yet she's talking to that guy. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

[Fixer12]

You may not realize it yet, but this is a GOOD THING!! She is doing this so it can save herself pain, and you pain. You may think it sucks right now... but you need to realize that this is going to help you way much more! You won't have to talk to her or look for her being online.

Honestly you need to accept things. If she wants to talk to you, she will talk to you. If she wants to be with you, she will be with you. Just don't waste time waiting anymore.

[naivedude]

I know how you feel. Mine went one further and just changed her aim altogether. Its her fault, she broke up with me, I turned into a really nice guy in touch with feelings and emotions, sent her broken heart emails and correspondence, I'm blamed for everything, she trashed my pride and dignity then yeah -disconnected completely from us with IM. So screwed!! But I agree its better than watching her logging in and out all day... :(

[damaged]

Like everyone says this is a great thing... It sux right now but it'll be better later on... this girl has made it more than clear that she doesn't want to be with you.. She is blocking you from her life completely, please stop wasting your time and energy on this girl... move on & leave her alone!!

[Ash123]

Guys, guys, guys - stop beating yourselves up.

As soon as your libido and your hormones calm down you will see how lucky you are.

Do you want girls that are a total mess in your life? Well, yes, right now you do! :-)
You ( and your pen-- )want back in now! I know...

Well, Nutty chicks do not need to stay on our di---.
Those girls are not for long relationships.

A favor has been done to you. Go to Hallmark and write them thank you notes if you want!
You are free and can find a girl who will turn you on and let you be yourself!

Rent some movies ASAP and see what laughter and endorphins are again.
And cut those IM's, texts, emails... etc.

GREAT BREAK UP MOVIES

Swingers (the perfect guy's break up movie)
Raising Arizona (a comedy that is smart and nuts)
Wedding Crashers (a comedy for buddies that is not totally crazy but is fun)
Old School (a comedy about old guys trying to be where you are.. again)
American Pie (fun fun fun)
National Lampoon's Vacation (absurd road trip comedy)
40 year old Virgin (hey, you think you have troubles? )
A Fish called Wanda (smart and funny with a little drama)
The Departed (guns and drama - not a comedy but a good escape when you are ready)

CLASSICS:

Monty Python's Meaning of Life and Holy Grail (Smart comedy and crazy history)
CaddyShack (golf club classic)
Terminator II (action film worth watching)
Risky Business (Tom Cruise when he was normal)
Sixteen Candles (High School is funny)
Ferris Beuller's Day Off (High school is funny again)
Fast Times at Ridgemont HIgh (High School is funny again... )

That's a start... Anyone can add to the list that wants to:

Take your brain to a new place!

This is your first step...