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-   -   Will She come back? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=220835)

  • May 28, 2008, 03:57 PM
    limeneko
    Will She come back?
    I know this has been asked over a million times here, but I can't help myself but to ask. Will she come back to me? It's been 4 days since she said to give her time and space alone. And she said she's afraid of me whenever she sees me now, and kept telling me to just give her time, and she will call me when she's ready. But she also said there's no way that we can be bg/gf again. But she said she will call me when she's ready. I guess I was too controlling, but I just can't help it when I see her goes out with other guys.

    I haven't contacted her today, but the day before I been bothering her telling her how much I need her. But she said Im not giving her time and I'm focing her. Next month the 15th it was suppose to be our 3 years anniversary. I know the chance of her coming back to me is not high. But what do you guys think? I'm going through the same stage a lot of you guys had gone through. I can't help myself, I want to call her I want to see her. But I didn't, at least not today.

    Also another thing that concerns me is, there's this guy that's a good friend of her and her brother. These couple of days when I drove by her house I would see his car parked in her drive way. And my heart is tearing apart as I see that. Thinking she will fall for that guy. But a friend is telling me that guy is going to Florida next month and probably won't come back. I'm so lost I don't know if I can believe that.

    Give me some ideas here guys please. I'm so lost, I know its my fault to begin with but I really want her back.
  • May 28, 2008, 04:02 PM
    limeneko
    She also told me that her love for me never changed. But she just don't know how to face me anymore. Would giving her time and space as she asked for the best thing to do? Cause I really afraid some guy will enter her life right now. Especially the guy that goes to her house every day.
  • May 28, 2008, 04:04 PM
    sandra6
    Hi have you sat down and talked about the relationship. Has she said why you have spilt up. If you are controlling then it could play a very part in this. You could give her space talk like friends and try not to be to hard. Why is she afraid when she sees you?
  • May 28, 2008, 04:07 PM
    limeneko
    For some reason she thinks ill hurt her. But I would never do that, I never did it. And no she told me to give her time and space. She don't want to talk to me or see me. She shuts her phone. All she said was to give her time and when she's ready she will call me, but she don't know when. People told me if she care about the anniversary date. She will probably call you that day. And yes she care about that day so much. Always ask me do you remember what we did last year and the year before. I just want her back so much.
  • May 28, 2008, 04:08 PM
    talaniman
    Stick a fork in it, this relationship is done, and she is enjoying her freedom, and you need to stop stalking, and spying, and get your own life in order.
  • May 28, 2008, 04:11 PM
    limeneko
    And there's no way to save this relationship?
  • May 28, 2008, 04:11 PM
    sandra6
    If this guy is only a friend what are you afraid of. She may talking about you. I don't think she would want to go straight into another relationship. Leave her for a while don't phone then in a couple of days phone her and just ask her how she is. Don't mention the relationship and see if she mentions it. Does that make sense?
  • May 28, 2008, 04:16 PM
    sandra6
    If you have never hurt her then I agree with talaiman a little. She is making excuses for her not to give you the answers you want. She keeping you dangling in case she changes her mind. I still think you should give her space to work out what she wants. Just try and get on with what you want to do, it will save some heart ache you are going through.
  • May 28, 2008, 04:16 PM
    limeneko
    But she told me not to call her at all, not until she's ready, if not I'm just not giving her time. Some people told me just do what she ask for to show her that I respect her decisios.
  • May 28, 2008, 04:18 PM
    limeneko
    I'm even thinking on the anniversary date get the rare flowers that she liked and show up in her house to talk about my feelings for her. But some say it's a bad thing to do
  • May 28, 2008, 04:23 PM
    sandra6
    I'm sorry mate I think that too. She is completely shutting you out for some reason. Why should you wait for her to call you. A relationship is a two people together not one waiting by the phone that might never ring. Get on with your life, I know it will be extremely hard but in the end you will realise it was the only thing you could have done. SORRY
  • May 28, 2008, 04:38 PM
    limeneko
    Well I guess what's done is done, I will give her time to be ready. In the mean time I should move on with me life. Its going to be hard. But ill try
  • May 28, 2008, 04:40 PM
    sandra6
    That's all you could do. Good luck and try to be happy in what ever you do.
  • May 28, 2008, 05:34 PM
    talaniman
    If a female had told me that (one has) I would disappear from her life, and never look back. Even if she called, I wouldn't take her back, I wouldn't even talk to her, because ain't that much love in the whole freakin' world, to kiss the butt of someone who treated me that way. Got it!! Save that money for the flowers and buy yourself a concert ticket.
  • May 28, 2008, 07:29 PM
    Fixer12
    Look man. I am going to have to agree with Taliman. Things do happen for a reason. If she just broke up with you out of no where saying, "im afraid your going to hurt me" sometimes that means, "i screwed up and im afraid of hurting you." I could be completely wrong as to I don't know your relationship to well besides the info you have given us.

    Yes, I think you need to give her her space. This will solve a couple of things. 1) You will start moving on and she will never call, and it won't effect you as much 2.) She will be totally blown away that you aren't trying to contact her and she will come crawling back (but don't expect it! Doesn't happen that way).

    When someone says they want their space, give it to them. Would you want someone bugging you constantly when you needed to think? Ya, when you are overcome with love you think, "yea i would actually like that they are showing they want to be with me." NO! No one likes someone that is making them feel uncomfortable.

    IF you don't hear anything by your anniversery. They you can drop her by some cards and some flowers... don't expect anything in return, or even a call. I would drop them at the door and do the whole "ring and ditch rutine" Just to show that you remembered. That's all. If you don't hear anything, then be done with it.

    I have been with a girl like this before, they want to have their cake and eat it. She may want to start something with this guy, I don't know better to assume the worst. But who cares? She left you, you did nothing wrong. It is OK to be jealous of her. Usually when your brain is telling you something like that, its cause your right... something is not going right. Listen to yourself. She may call you over-protective/controlling but something is telling you to do that... she is acting different.

    Good things.
  • May 28, 2008, 07:36 PM
    limeneko
    Only if I can get over it so easily
  • May 28, 2008, 07:43 PM
    Ash123
    READ THIS ASAP:

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...sh-114179.html

    Never chase a woman that truly wants space...

    Never.

    Ever.

    Ever.

    Never.

    Ever.
  • May 28, 2008, 07:46 PM
    Fixer12
    Its hard man. But you need to step up and accept it. You need to have some positive attitude otherwise... no... you won't get over it
  • May 28, 2008, 08:08 PM
    ajhastings88
    Neko, I know were you are coming from, I am on my 3 day of NC, I would go by her house and figure out he was over there a lot. Trust me man, it isn't worth it. Find something to do, call up some of you home girls and just chat. Go see a movie, do anything you can to get your mind off it. And if you are really set on the flowers thing, do what fixer said. That would probably blow her mind. But if she calls don't answer, if she text don't reply. Expect to get nothing, because if she does call you and can't get in contact with you, it will A. Drive her nuts, and she will realize W T F DID SHE JUST DO, ( RARE ) or B. Mean nothing to her and she will go on with her life, like it never happened. Hang in there dude you in that early stage like I am just moving a lot faster than I thought I would. I ,and We are here for you.
  • May 28, 2008, 08:19 PM
    limeneko
    Well her close friends told me she still loves me, but she just need time alone herself, and told me to leave her alone and she will come back to me. Only if that's true

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