[Ehob1]

Me and my ex was together for a year. We've been broke up for three months now. It's been hard for me. I'm o.k with it until I see him. We had problems just like any other couple. There was no cheating and no major arguments. I didn't know how to talk to him when something was bothering me. I would lash out at him because I felt that it was the only way to get his attention. I kept pushing and pushing until he left without telling me why. I know that I did some damage to my relationship. If I could undue what I meesed up I would, but I can't. When I saw him, we had a conversation and he told me that he misses me and still had feelings for me. I had him, but I feel like I've lost my best friend and my relationship, I just don't know what to do. When I'm in church because we attend the same church, he stares at me a lot and will sometimes come to the other side to approach me, but he doesn't call me anymore. I don't know what he's really thinking. Is there a possibility that he don't know what to say to me? Does he still have feelings for me, but could be confused? Should I go to him and talk to him?

[Skell]

Perhaps it is best if you asked him those questions. If you feel there is a chance that he may still have feelings for you and you think it you can make it work (you have to be real honest with yourself when answering that question) then talk to him. See how he feels. But be prepared for an answer you may not want to hear. I don't think getting back with ex's is a good idea. Something has to be different the second time round. Something obviously didn't work the first time so something has to change to make it work the second time otherwise your just wasting time that could be used to move forward with your life and not back.

It is important that you be honest with yourself when analysing whether it is worth trying again.

Good luck!

[Chery]

Hi dear. Please go to the following page and read the very first sticky... then read the next three.

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/

People put in a lot of effort to compose these and they are worth reading.

There are no guarantees in any relationship, but what is important is that you learn from the good and the bad and make your future choices wisely.

If I had 5 cents for every time we get a 'I want him/her back' post I would be a millionairess now.

We all have gone through it many times in our lives and also come into contact with people from our past - believe me, it will get easier in time.

So, do some reading now and then get back with us on what you think you want for your self-respect and peace of mind.

Good luck. We'll be here to help you along no matter what choice you make.

[JBeaucaire]

He may be waiting for you to get better on your own in terms of whatever stuff you're going through. Needy girls can only attract men who want needy girls. I guess that's not him.

My wife is completely independent. She doesn't need me at all. She can figure things out, smart as a whip, a total doer and can organize her way out of a tornado.

Having said that, she relies on me all the time. By choice. She defers to my skills on things I KNOW she can do fine on her own. It's very endearing and respectful.

What I'm saying is that two completely confident indidivuals who CHOOSE to share a life together is so much better than one clingy/needy/crazy/problematic one and one having to help the other "solve their issues" all the time. It gets tiring. He may just not be up for it.

If you want him, you may need to just get your act together and head on straight and stand up tall and be THE GAL! Much more attractive to many men, perhaps him as well.

Think about it.

[Chery]

He may be waiting for you to get better on your own in terms of whatever stuff you're going through. Needy girls can only attract men who want needy girls. I guess that's not him.

My wife is completely independent. She doesn't need me at all. She can figure things out, smart as a whip, a total doer and can organize her way out of a tornado.

Having said that, she relies on me all the time. By choice. She defers to my skills on things I KNOW she can do fine on her own. It's very endearing and respectful.

What I'm saying is that two completely confident indidivuals who CHOOSE to share a life together is so much better than one clingy/needy/crazy/problematic one and one having to help the other "solve their issues" all the time. It gets tiring. He may just not be up for it.

If you want him, you may need to just get your act together and head on straight and stand up tall and be THE GAL! Much more attractive to many men, perhaps him as well.

Think about it.

Your wife's a lucky girl and she know it. I envy the heck out of her and wish cloning was legal.

[starlite1]

I agree with Chery!

[brian1231]

I was on the other end of the spectrum where I was always solving my ex's issues. It does get tiring. Take time. Work on YOURSELF. Whatever your issues were, fix them.