[Nosnosna]

Even without any odd behavior on your part, it was probably still awkward for him to see you in those classes. He may have been able to switch to a different section of the same class without penalty, so while it may be due to you, it's entirely possible that it doesn't have a negative impact on his schooling.

As far as blocking you on MSN goes... it's likely that he's doing that as part of a no-contact regimen on his own part. He may have caught himself checking your status and such on there more often than he felt was healthy, and decided to put a stop to it.

As Tal says, don't worry about what he's doing... his choices are his, not yours. Good or bad, he has to deal with them on his own, and his problems are no longer yours to deal with.

[kaitou]

Hi all,

I've recently gotten back in touch with my ex after 1 year and 4 months of no contacts. He was the one that initiated contact, I've originally never intended to get in touch with him again. I must say, I was really surprised to receive a email from him genuinely asking how I was doing.

Without thinking, I responded happily, telling him how my year went, and how much I've grown, and that I have found my passions and dreams in life. This led to a series of email exchange between the both of us. We would email each other everyday, just catching up, our emails are soooo long their size range from 10kb to 20+kb. Telling each other our beliefs and aspiration, etc etc. I feel like I'm getting to know him again, and vice versa. The both of us changed so much since we've last spoken. Or maybe I never really knew him at all, since our relationship ended quickly and abruptly before anything gotten to serious.

I can't help but feel attracted to him all over again, I like how he is confident, strong, have goals and passions in life, and is independent. I feel like I want to better myself when I'm around him (before and now). Now I know I'm getting a bit ahead of myself, I haven't even seen him yet lol... just exchanging email is making me attracted.. I feel like I got it bad.

Anyway, I decided to not act upon my feelings. I planned to just go with the flow, and see where it develops, because although I'm attracted to him, I haven't seen him yet, and the reasons that we broke up in the first place still exists, and the problem is big, and requires two very committed people to solve it. I was even content to just stay as pen-pals or email-pals, or whatever you call it.

Anyhow, he has asked to meet up with me in his latest email and catch up. I am a bit scared. I'm happy with our relationship right now, and I am scared that it will be ruined if I meet up with him. But I do want to see him.

I told him that I can't meet up with him for the next few weeks, because I'm busy. Which is the truth, and he should know it, because I told him how busy my summer schedule was in my previous emails. But would love to meet up with him as soon as my schedule becomes less busy.

Sooo.. right now I plan to just get to know him more, go with the flow, and see where this goes. Maybe my feelings will fade to just wanting to be friends when I see him, who knows. Even if my feelings grow stronger after I meet up, I plan to not act on it, because again I need to get to know him, and also I see a lot of problems between us, sooo I don't want to do anything unless we're on the same page.

What do you guys think?

(my worst fear right now, is that he's reading this LOL)

[talaniman]

When you go into things without high expectations, and assumptions, or false hope, you can make rational decisions, and decide on your actions, and his in a realistic way. Don't just let your heart lead you into bad decisions, but weigh, the facts of the matter. YOU have been down this road before, so never forget the lessons you've already learned. Much Luck.

[jrsg]

Very true talaniman...
I am trying to get my ex back right now. If she was thinking like you I think I would be the happiest man on the face of the earth. I would give you advice, but with the situation I'm in right now, it would obviously be extremely biased.

[talaniman]

For one thing, as we all have, the OP has been through a lot, and made the recovery necessary to make good decisions based on facts, and not just emotions, and has a year of learning and growing under her belt.
https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/search...archid=2814860, as her writing shows. I think she will be okay, and cope with whatever comes up.

[kaitou]

Oh geez tal, thanks for making me feel so exposed.. by linking to my embarrassing history lol. But thanks for reassuring me that I've grown :). It means a lot coming from you!

[talaniman]

No need for embarrassment, as your story is inspiring in my view.

[Jiser]

Take it slow slow !

[Maggie83]

Hey there, I hope all goes well for you and you're a good advert for NC! : )

Sounds like the guy may be thinking the same way you are but T-man is right you have got to a place where you can make a rational decision, try to keep it that way!

Recently I contacted my ex, it's a long story but I just passed on some info from a friend, I didn't ask how she was or what she's been up to, no kisses on the email just simply the info, I was basically expecting a thank you and that's it... three days later I get a novel back from her asking how I was twice in the email, asking how my parents were and calling me honey and sweetheart, its weird when they get back in touch after a while so I'm airing on the side of severe caution!

[ka1111]

Link doesn't work for me...

[talaniman]

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/search...archid=2870393

Try this one.

[f104]

Thanks for sharing. Your story gives me hope for me and my ex in the future. Thank you so much.

[damaged]

Neither of the links worked

[kaitou]

Hey guys,

So I thought I'll give an update on what happened after my last entry. It's not the ending I hoped for, but I'm contend with the ending regardless.

So shortly after my last entry, he disappeared on me (we never saw each other before the disappearance). I was upset for a bit, but I just shift back to no contact.

Now half a year later, he contacts me again. From what he's telling me it would appear that he still thinks about me from time to time. But this time, he seemed to open up more, he talked quite a bit about our time together. Replied to him a couple of time, and well long story short, he disappeared again.

Compared the last 2 times that he left, this time I feel a lot more calm and happy. Instead of feeling sad about myself, I feel sad about his behaviour, his immaturity, or maybe his character. Perhaps I was always just an option to him.

This time I really feel a sense of closure, because I have said everything I wanted to say to him. And also I finally realize what he is.

If he were to appear in the future, I am pretty positive that I'll ignore him.

[LifeChangesMan]

This was a good post, thanks for sharing it with us.

[kaitou]

Hello everyone,

Just wanted to update my story again..

I finally met someone new, and he's awesome.

He's also a big contrast to my ex. Now I look back, and realize that my ex wasn't great at all...

The new guy pay attention to the things I say, treats me like a lady, and would make time for me despite his busy schedule.

I am really happy, and I'm definitely going to cherish this guy.

So there's light at the end of the tunnel. Stick with NC, and move on! You'll never know what's in store for you :)

[kctiger]

hello everyone,

Just wanted to update my story again..

I finally met someone new, and he's awesome.

He's also a big contrast to my ex. Now i look back, and realize that my ex wasn't great at all...

The new guy pay attention to the things i say, treats me like a lady, and would make time for me despite his busy schedule.

I am really happy, and i'm definitely gonna cherish this guy.

so there's light at the end of the tunnel. Stick with NC, and move on! You'll never know what's in store for you :)

That's great news. Now... just take it slow, no epectations, and have FUN!!

[kaitou]

So update again, I don't know how many people actually read my thread LOL, but I just want to update it for people that has been following my story.

My relationship with the new guy didn't work out, but we're now great friends :)

I wrote to my ex recently (the guy I talked about in my first post), I was stress, sad, and disappointed about various things in my life. I was speaking to him as if he was my confidant.

I didn't expect a reply. Basically I wrote the email, thinking it's like a message in a bottle that you throw into the sea, but in this case I know someone will read it LOL

But a few weeks later, he wrote me a longass reply.

Basically telling me that the moments we had were special, and something that he cherished, and that it is something he never shared with anyone else. And apparently that's why he always send me incoherent emails, 2 years later after our break up

Apparently, I am the person he wants to turn to when he's lonely, and sad, or just missing the "moments we had". And he was pleasantly surprise that he was that person for me too.

Also, apparently the past couple of years, he has actually written me long long emails (a couple of them) that he ended up deleting, because he thought they were inappropriate, or that I probably hated him LOL.

He concluded that, because what we had was special that we'll always send the occasional email to each other. And that he is more than happy to be my confidant.

With that said. I didn't completely stick with NC, but I broke it after I have healed. What he wrote was so genuine, and sweet! I couldn't ask for a better closure. I can finally say I've found my peace.

I wrote him a reply, and for the first time ever, there was really no ulterior motives. I don't know how many of you would actually believe me, but I REALLY REALLY mean it this time.

I can't believe I am saying this (and mean it), but I'm finally ready to just be friends :).. or just a non-romantic online friend..