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lovergirl12708 · May 21, 2008, 04:58 PM

Sometimes I have other thoughts during sex. Not always can I not concentrate on my boyfriend, but sometimes I have odd thoughts. Like, laundry, homework, dinner, my dogs. I sometimes make a to do list. Plan what I'm going to do tomorrow. Think about my problems, my life. Basically everything. Sometimes exes. I feel horrible when I realize I am doing this. It's not that We have bad sex. Our sex life is amazing. But I don't know. Sometimes I can't help it no matter how hard I try. Sometimes I can't be in to it mentally. Is there anyway I can fix that? Is it normal?

Xrayman · May 21, 2008, 05:28 PM

It's called being a woman. The amount of things on a woman's mind would blow-up the best supercomputer.

On the other hand you may be bored with sex with your BF.

lovergirl12708 · May 21, 2008, 05:36 PM

Originally Posted by Xrayman

It's called being a woman. The amount of things on a woman's mind would blow-up the best supercomputer.

on the other hand you may be bored with sex with your BF.

True. It always feels great, but mentally I can't be there. Maybe it could be boredom. Maybe something new would help?

southerngalps · May 21, 2008, 05:51 PM

I would think if your mind is wondering, then the sex isn't AMAZING as you say. Maybe some new positions, ideas, etc. might keep your mind on the prize.;) ;) ;)

bushg · May 21, 2008, 05:59 PM

Maybe you have too much to do, ask him to help ease your load.

Fr_Chuck · May 21, 2008, 06:06 PM

Call it multi tasking. Our minds can think of 100's of things in a few seconds,

southerngalps · May 21, 2008, 06:12 PM

Yeah... we can do that but why would anyone want to do that while having sex?? I have never done that, and I don't think I would really want to.

lisap024 · May 21, 2008, 06:21 PM

I'm surprised at how many people think this is okay and normal. This is only my opinion and my experience but, I think it would be disrespectful to make a "to do list" while having sex! I try to think about what will make my partner happy and think about why we're here together. It shouldn't be so impersonal.

lovergirl12708 · May 21, 2008, 06:26 PM

Originally Posted by southerngalps

I would think if your mind is wondering, then the sex isn't AMAZING as you say. Maybe some new positions, ideas, etc. might keep your mind on the prize.;) ;) ;)

Because my mind doesn't ALWAYS wander. And the sex is amazing. And it always feels amazing.

Yes maybe I do have a lot on my plate.

And yes multi-tasking. I know... I would just to not be multi-tasking while having sex with my boyfriend.

lovergirl12708 · May 21, 2008, 06:29 PM

Originally Posted by lisap024

I'm surprised at how many people think this is okay and normal. This is only my opinion and my experience but, I think it would be disrespectful to make a "to do list" while having sex! I try to think about what will make my partner happy and think about why we're here together. It shouldn't be so impersonal.

Well see, so do I that's why I asked. I want to always be there mentally. I love my boyfriend I just don't know why I can't always focus on him

lisap024 · May 21, 2008, 06:44 PM

Well... I know sometimes my mind wanders but my partner notices and will do something crazy like pull my hair to bring me back (I know TMI). I like to have sex to forget about all the bs.

lovergirl12708 · May 21, 2008, 07:21 PM

That actually helped in a odd way. Thanks lisa024.

Choux · May 21, 2008, 09:29 PM

So, it comes down to the fact that you are servicing your husband... that is what happens to a lot of married people who are busy and who have lost passion for each other!! All woman have to do that at one time or another... but a steady diet of distracting yourself from what is happening to you in the now is not healthy, in my opinion.

Sex is pleasure... for your sake, I hope you want to find a way to add real mental and emotional pleasure back into your life.

Why not redecorate your bedroom in dark lush colors, add mood lighting and put a lock on the door. Get Dr. Northrup's book on female sexuality and begin practicing her recommendation that every woman needs to have three thirty-minute episodes of self-pleasuring every week. Reawaken your passion at all costs. :)

Regular healthy sex is so important to mental and physical health! Don't put sexual bliss on the back burner in favor of housework... go for it! :)

lovergirl12708 · May 22, 2008, 05:27 AM

Originally Posted by Choux

So, it comes down to the fact that you are servicing your husband....that is what happens to a lot of married people who are busy and who have lost passion for each other!!! All woman have to do that at one time or another..... but a steady diet of distracting yourself from what is happening to you in the now is not healthy, in my opinion.

Sex is pleasure..... for your sake, I hope you want to find a way to add real mental and emotional pleasure back into your life.

Why not redecorate your bedroom in dark lush colors, add mood lighting and put a lock on the door. Get Dr. Northrup's book on female sexuality and begin practicing her recommendation that every woman needs to have three thirty-minute episodes of self-pleasuring every week. Reawaken your passion at all costs. :)

Regular healthy sex is so important to mental and physical health! Don't put sexual bliss on the back burner in favor of housework....go for it! :)

Hmmm... I shall try. But regular sex is a no for me since not tha I moved I won't be seeing my boyfriend maybe one weekend out of every month. I won't be seeing until sometime in the middle of next month