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    emeraldbear's Avatar
    emeraldbear Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    May 14, 2008, 06:34 AM
    Homeless and Confused
    Ok, this is a long story. I'm in my early twenties, was in a 3 year relationship that broke up about a year ago, we lived together, it was wonderful until the end. Now, I'm 6 months in with a guy in his late twenties, owns his own home, car, successful job, he's a very nice guy.
    So I had to move out of my apartment and the plan was stay with my parents until fall when I'll get a place with my friends (girls and guys.) This is the plan because my guy thinks its too early to move in together. I get it, 6 months isn't a long time. BUT we're going on a vacation together, we've met the folks, we've been through hard times, and we're in love. I practically live at his place anyway, spend every night there (yes, OK its mainly cause my place doesn't have much over-night parking available, he says he'd have stayed there more if there was and when I get a place with my friends he'll sleep there.) I'm just frustrated that he doesn't want to move this forward. Is it always going to be him in power deciding the timing of everything? I don't want it to be that way, but I feel it will be.
    So now, I had a fight with my mother and moved all my stuff to his house and I'm going to stay here for a while. My girls are like "ooooh, maybe you'll just stay there." But I don't think so. Others say "don't push him, you're already practically living there, why not just keep it like it is."

    I could really use some mature advice. Thanks so much.
    bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE's Avatar
    bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE Posts: 1,051, Reputation: 112
    Ultra Member
     
    #2

    May 14, 2008, 06:45 AM
    It sounds like your guy thinks that by moving in, it would be too fast for him, which after six months I don't blame him. Maybe he believes that your relationship would get ruined by doing that.

    You just got out of a 3 year relationship (long) and now after 6 months with someone new you want to move on to a very big step? What happened with you last relationship?
    thegreatestviz's Avatar
    thegreatestviz Posts: 70, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member
     
    #3

    May 14, 2008, 06:48 AM
    Well you have 2 options now
    Get back home with your parents and continue to be so called practically living every night at his house.

    Or continue living at his place which is quite risky because since you have mentioned he doesn't want to move forward with it

    If you are sure that you can hold on to him and his nature then it would be great

    Otherwise taking such a big decision involving undetermined risks would be a foolish thing to do.

    Think wisely.
    450donn's Avatar
    450donn Posts: 1,821, Reputation: 239
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    #4

    May 14, 2008, 06:57 AM
    Remember this:
    Friends first
    Then marriage
    Then sex
    Kind of sounds like he likes to be in control of everything. If that is the case, you are never going to change him, no matter what. Accept him as he is or move on to a better situation.

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