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New Member
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Apr 30, 2008, 09:09 AM
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Want my Ex back. Should I ignore when he calls?
My ex and were together for almost 6 years. He broke up with me about 2 months ago because he said he couldn't do it anymore. He wanted to be alone... the whole deal. I am still in love with him and I know he's immature. We are both 22 by the way. I made it clear to him that I couldn't really talk to him or be his friend because it was too hard. We tried the friendship thing before and it usually ended up in disaster. So we talked about a week ago made things clear that we weren't going to be friends now or maybe ever. The past two days he has called me 5 times. I have not answered once. He left me voicemails saying he doesn't know what my problem is and that he will stop calling me because I obviously have nothing to say to him. Should I answer or call him back? I am sure he just wants to talk about nonsense... but I do ultimately want him back, I just want him to be sorry and realize what he lost because I know he will never ever find a girl that was as good to him as me. I feel that as long as I am there, he will just take advantage and never miss me, that's why I ignored him. I want him to be upset just like he makes me, I am always there for him and I'm usually always there to pick up the phone and be at his beckon call, but I can't anymore. I don't want to be a considering we live in the same town and I will surely see him, but in the end I know I love him and want to be with him 100%... but I no he's not calling to get back with me, just to talk I'm sure and see what I'm doing.. I'm trying to change my pattern so I get better results. I really need help I miss him so much!
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New Member
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Apr 30, 2008, 09:55 AM
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You wrote, "...I just want him to be sorry and realize what he lost because i know he will never ever find a girl that was as good to him as me."
Keep ignoring him, and he will realize that. However, he should be giving you attitude by asking you what your problem is, since HE is the one who left you in the first place! If you ask me, he deserves to be ignored, and frankly, I would do my best to move on. I wish I had your attitude about this because my ex came crawling back to me 4 weeks later after breaking up with me and I let him back into my life, only to have him break up with me again 2 weeks later for the same reason he broke up with me the first time- I caught him lying and he couldn't tell me the truth, instead he told me I was paranoid, etc.etc. Unbelieveable.
However, if you really think that you want the relationship back, perhaps answer the phone the next time he calls. Discuss how things are going to be different if you get back together.. etc.. etc..
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Senior Member
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Apr 30, 2008, 10:08 AM
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You are asking if you should ignore his calls, I believe no contact in this case is the best decision, being that this break up was fresh,and you could end up going in circles or get upset if he doesn't want you back, Each day you talk to him you will have to start all over again. Can you be friends at some point in life? Sure anything is possible, but first you must have to strengthen yourself, and as long as you have his indecisiveness in the picture you will be going backwards instead of moving forward. Let him realize his decision that he made, he has to live with his choice, and in the meantime, you shouldn't feel bad for not answering his calls. You have to stick to what you said and he needs to know that you are serious. It's not that you are playing games by doing this, It means that you know what you want and you won't settle no matter how much you love someone, in the end you have to love yourself MORE and know that this may be for your own sake... Good luck stick in there and take it one day at a time.
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Junior Member
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Apr 30, 2008, 03:31 PM
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He said "he wants to be alone". So, give it to him. Don't answer. My boyfriend gave me a similar line and then yet kept calling. Finally, you just got to stand up for yourself. If they want to be alone, if they want to be free, than you just got to give it to them! No contact is the best thing you can do to end your and possibly his confusion.
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Junior Member
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Apr 30, 2008, 08:29 PM
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No contact can be quite effective if you don't want to give him the impression that he can get you back so easily. From personal experience I happen to know that "silence is golden."
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