[lrobertson]

Why is it that people in general insist on wanting what they can't have, this boy, man, whatever he may be referred to I loved him for so long....so so so so so long four years so long, we were best friends and would date on and off but were always the best of friends. When one wanted to be with the other, the other had too much on their plate... School, work, being with other people... He knew the whole time how I felt, it continued like that for two years..I find out I am pregnant... She's his baby.... he got scared and walked away from me when I was 34 weeks pregnant, he started dating someone else...Our beautiful baby was born...he didnt see her until she was three months old...I was serious with someone else... He ends up being a wonderful father and although I still have some resentment towrds him, its like we never skipped a beat he is also my best friend again...I am engaged to the other man... he writes me and email a long heart felt apology and no excuses says he will live with always wondering what we could be if he didnt act the way he did and get scared....Is it only because he wants what he can't have, am I taking away from my Daughter, OUR daughter by not trying to see one more time if we could be together if we could be happy...My poor perfect fiance he is so wonderful and I am such a terrible person....

[Crabbergirl]

Oh Girl. I am not sure how old you are but this guy sounds like he has a huge fear of commitment. And YES he only wants what he can't have. If you love the man you are engaged to then that is where you need to focus not on some looser who seems to just want to disrupt your life. You can postpone the wedding plans until you are sure but I wouldn't take baby's daddy at his word. You may just be meant to be friends. Make your decision based on your knowledge of past actions not on your heart. Just like men, we think with another organ... the heart... go with your brain that's why God gave it to you. I wish you luck because it is not just your life you are now responsible for... you have a daughter, the most important thing in your life. Do what is right for her. If he splits again how do you think that will effect her??

[N0help4u]

I agree stay with what you have. Your ex could just be remembering the good times and not thinking of the things that scared him off. If you got back with him and he got cold feet again he could leave again and leave you stuck and alone.

[tigerlilly3]

I would definitely stay with the guy you got now. He already had his chance and he left it alone even when you were pregnant with his baby! Just because he wants to be with you now doesn't mean he will want to get married and have a family like your fiancé already has showed! Think outside the companionship you have with him and remember the hurt when he left and look at how your fiancé treats you and you'll see what you should do. You could even make a pros and cons list for both of them! Hope everything ends up well!

[lrobertson]

Thanks everyone I really appreciate the answers, just to clear some things up I am only 21, well I will be 22 in July... Young I know but that's what happens when you act grown, you have beautiful children that change your life forever =) I don't know if its because he was my first love or what he just kind of has that effect on me. I love my fiancé very much and I have been very honest with him which probably was not the best things because now he cannot even be in the same room with my little girls dad. My little girls dad is a great guy, but I am deathly scared of him because of his commitment issues, you definitely hit the nail on the head with that one, and with all my decisions I ever make my little girl is always in my mind, I don't want to do anything that will hurt her in the long run... I guess this is one of those things I hear take allot of time "trust me I know from expereince your young no need to make any decisions at all" that is my favorite one... I love this web site =) Thanks again...