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-   -   Man beater? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=405713)

  • Oct 13, 2009, 07:24 PM
    kendraroo2010
    Man beater?


    I honestly have no clue what is wrong with me. When I get in bad moods or have crappy days, I tend to beat the live out of my boyfriend.. I haven't the slightest idea why. At first I will just annoy and aggervate him, then he starts to get pissed off, after I get a rise out of him, I start hitting and punching and kicking. Anything I can do to hurt him.. I seriously think I have a problem. Am I bi-polar? Should I be medicated? I seriously don't think he can take anymore of it. And I really hate hurting him the way I do. I don't want to loose him because I can't control myself..
  • Oct 13, 2009, 07:27 PM
    friend4u178

    Yes there is something wrong with you and if you don't want to lose your BF go and see your Doctor so he can get you some help.
  • Oct 13, 2009, 07:38 PM
    kendraroo2010

    What do I say?
    And thanks for being so blunt about it. :P
  • Oct 13, 2009, 07:46 PM
    friend4u178

    You tell him exactly what happens , he'll then analyze it depending on the circumstances you tell him.

    Sorry if I came across as blunt , wasn't meant that way.
  • Oct 13, 2009, 07:48 PM
    kendraroo2010

    Its all right..
    I'm a little embarrassed to tell my doctor that I beat my boyfriend...
  • Oct 13, 2009, 07:53 PM
    friend4u178
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by kendraroo2010 View Post
    its alright..
    im a little embarrassed to tell my doctor that i beat my boyfriend...
    Better than losing your BF ;)

    And don't worry , your Dr will have seen it all before.
  • Oct 13, 2009, 08:16 PM
    kendraroo2010

    Your right. But which doctor do I go to.
    I just found out a couple days ago there is a doctor for everything.. haha
  • Oct 13, 2009, 08:19 PM
    JudyKayTee

    Should be combined with this - https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/childr...ml#post2030206

    Note that OP is 17.
  • Oct 13, 2009, 08:20 PM
    friend4u178

    If you go to your Local GP he can either diagnose you or refer you to someone who can.
  • Oct 13, 2009, 08:21 PM
    kendraroo2010

    I'm confused.
    Sorry. I don't understand.
    Are they related?
  • Oct 13, 2009, 08:33 PM
    Alty

    You're an abuser, so yes, you have a problem.

    You beat your boyfriend. You say you don't want to but that doesn't make you stop. You're abusive and your boyfriend should leave, just like anyone else that's being abused.

    You need to get help. That help is up to you. A doctor is your first step, then a psychiatrist.

    Either way, your boyfriend should move on at this point, at least until you learn to control yourself.
  • Oct 13, 2009, 08:36 PM
    kendraroo2010

    I really don't want to loose him.. I really just started doing this recently.. most of the time I just want to play around.. but it gets out of control wayyyy too fast..
  • Oct 13, 2009, 08:38 PM
    friend4u178
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by kendraroo2010 View Post
    i really dont want to loose him.. i really just started doing this recently.. most of the time i just want to play around.. but it gets out of control wayyyy too fast..

    Which is why you need to go to your Dr before you do.

    At least your aware of your problem , now you just need to do something about it.
  • Oct 13, 2009, 08:40 PM
    Alty
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by kendraroo2010 View Post
    i really dont want to loose him.. i really just started doing this recently.. most of the time i just want to play around.. but it gets out of control wayyyy too fast..
    I've heard this before.

    It's the same as when my boyfriend smashed my head into a windshield and then told me he was sorry, he didn't want to loose me, he was just playing around and it got out of control. He promises he'll never do it again, blah, blah, blah, blah.

    You need help. Right now, he needs to be away from you because you've admitted that you can't stop. If you can't stop then you won't, until you get help.

    This is not about you anymore, it's about him and the fact that he doesn't deserve to be treated like this.
  • Oct 13, 2009, 08:46 PM
    kendraroo2010

    Yeah. I will talk to him about it tonight and see if it helps any. Maybe we just need some space.
  • Oct 13, 2009, 09:00 PM
    paxe

    Go to a psychiatrist also he may help you out.
  • Oct 19, 2009, 10:30 PM
    kendraroo2010

    Its all right he left, and I'm not really worried about it anymore.
  • Oct 19, 2009, 10:38 PM
    Enigma1999
    Hello K,

    That still doesn't change the fact that you still need help. It doesn't matter if you and your boyfriend already broke up, what about when you start to date a new guy? You will just continue to do it no matter who you are with! My advice is that you still get help from a doctor.. Good luck.
  • Oct 19, 2009, 10:41 PM
    talaniman

    You should still seek some help, or you will probably do this again. You may not see it this way, but your dangerously out of control.
  • Oct 21, 2009, 09:49 PM
    kendraroo2010

    I think I just need to stay away from boys.. I think ill try a different approch.
  • Oct 21, 2009, 09:53 PM
    Alty
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by kendraroo2010 View Post
    i think i just need to stay away from boys.. i think ill try a different approch.
    What? Becoming a lesbian?

    Do you plan never to date again?

    You need help.
  • Oct 21, 2009, 10:18 PM
    rockie100

    Don't you want to get better? You could have a illness. It could be you have a hormone imbalance, or something else that could be treated. You should at least care about your health.
  • Oct 21, 2009, 10:20 PM
    friend4u178
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Altenweg View Post
    What? Becoming a lesbian?
    I wouldn't recommend trying to beat up on a Lesbian either , just sayin'

    Bottom line is you need to get some help to fix your problem if your going to lash out at anyone your with.
  • Oct 22, 2009, 05:24 AM
    JudyKayTee
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by friend4u178 View Post
    I wouldn't recommend trying to beat up on a Lesbian either , just sayin'

    Bottom line is you need to get some help to fix your problem if your going to lash out at anyone your with.

    Maybe a man won't put his hands on a woman, won't fight back - get the feeling it's not the same with lesbians so OP dating one and beating up on "her" might just end the cycle.
  • Oct 22, 2009, 05:39 AM
    jmjoseph
    Have you always gotten angry when you didn't get your way?

    How would your parents describe you?

    Not too many people would want to be with someone who is so quick to "snap". You should seriously consider getting help.

    Things like this always get worse before they get better.

    What if you DON'T get help and you get angry with one of your children one day?
  • Oct 22, 2009, 06:08 AM
    J_9
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by kendraroo2010 View Post

    i honestly have no clue what is wrong with me. when i get in bad moods or have crappy days, i tend to beat the live out of my boyfriend.. i havent the slightest idea why. at first i will just annoy and aggervate him, then he starts to get pissed off, after i get a rise out of him, i start hittin and punching and kicking. anything i can do to hurt him.. i seriously think i have a problem. Am i bi-polar? should i be medicated?! I seriously dont think he can take anymore of it. and i really hate hurting him the way i do. i dont want to loose him because i can't control myself..
    Maybe some jail time and a domestic violence charge will straighten you out. This is domestic abuse no matter how you look at it. Men more frequently abuse, but women do also.
  • Oct 22, 2009, 06:14 AM
    Romefalls19

    Avoiding your problems will only cause more. You need to own up to it, because I'm sorry if this offends any women on here. A man can only take so much abuse before he may eventually snap as well. Everyone knows, we all have our breaking points
  • Oct 22, 2009, 06:15 AM
    JudyKayTee

    I just checked the history of OP - she has many, many issues in her life, some of which (undoubtedly) are causing violent behavior. https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/childr...ml#post2030206

    She needs counselling - in a big way and now.
  • Oct 22, 2009, 06:16 AM
    I wish
    You're lucky your boyfriend didn't call the police. You will need to take care your problems eventually, why postpone it? Your problems are not going to magically disappear. If you can't figure out which doctor to see, then see your family doctor to get a recommendation. But it sounds like you might need to see multiple doctors, counsellors or therapists for each problem.

    It's not about being embarassed/pride/ego, it's about taking care of yourself. It takes even more confidence to accept that you have problems and to go fix them. It's easy to hide away and pretend nothing is wrong.
  • Oct 22, 2009, 11:56 AM
    slapshot_oi
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by kendraroo2010 View Post
    its alright..
    im a little embarrassed to tell my doctor that i beat my boyfriend...
    Better he knows than the local police chief. You at least have doctor-patient privilege.

    You know you have a problem, you know you need to get help, so why are you wasting time asking us these questions? Get help already.
  • Oct 23, 2009, 10:32 AM
    kendraroo2010

    Its not that I snap. I don't need help anymore thanks. I don't beat him anymore. I fixed th problem on my own. I'm not going to beat lesbians. And I'm not going to jail. Sorry about your luck.
  • Oct 23, 2009, 10:37 AM
    kendraroo2010

    Okay. I think all of you are under the impression that I actually beat him.. like men do to their wife's. I'm severely underwieght. I weigh not even 100 lbs. more like 93. I'm pretty sure I could not actually BEAT him. He is 18 years old and a lot bigger and stronger then me. You guys obviously don't understand what I'm trying to ask so I I will handle it myself. Thanks for all your help...

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