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-   -   Ex on my mind AS SOON as I wake up.Is that normal? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=418898)

  • Dec 15, 2008, 01:33 PM
    kctiger

    But, major props to you. You should write an essay on here about moving on, as you seemed to do it perfectly, even as being the one who was dumped. I look up to you for that, and I am proud of you. Good job! Just keep moving forward. Relationships can be painful, no doubt about it, but you learn a lot about yourself with each.
  • Dec 15, 2008, 01:35 PM
    9Lives
    You guys are right. Since I still love him and think about him and all that. It is so funny, that day was such a hard day for me and in the end I see him and this is what happens.
    It is just weird. But he can't tell that I am suffering and missing him a lot. I just have to keep my calm face and play it cool.
  • Dec 15, 2008, 01:51 PM
    9Lives
    I can't take a whole lot of credit. I learned how to handle myself on this website and others. It has paid off no doubt. But it still hurts. It just don't hurt like it would if I would have been doing it my own self without guidance. So I am glad I have been following the advice given here. It really is good. I learn so much of what not to do to make yourself like a a/s and to have something to be proud of yourself. The ex can really tear you all the way down and it is nice to not be able to give them all that power. Im happy about that but I still have so much love for this guy. It is getting better though.
  • Dec 15, 2008, 01:53 PM
    kctiger

    Just take it day by day, all right? I know how it is. I am almost on month four of the break up and I still love my ex dearly... that just makes us good people, that's all. Nothing wrong with that. What matters is that we are healing and getting better, the time is not a factor. Keep your chin up.
  • Dec 15, 2008, 02:56 PM
    9Lives
    Excellent, excellent, excellent.

    I will write that down. TAke it one day at a time. That's all I can do.

    Yes I love my ex so much but this is where we are and I am working to accept it. Everyday is different and a challenge. It has been about a month for me as well.
    Oh well.
  • Dec 15, 2008, 04:57 PM
    9Lives
    (Group Hug) You guys are amazing. I am really glad I am here in the time of my life. I know I would have made every single dumb mistake to mankind without you all teaching me how to let someone go.

    I am working on it. I am working on it. That is all I cn say. It takes time, time, time.

    Then I seen him this weekend while I was on a date. It was weird. He was surprised too. He saw me before I saw him so he had that look on his face. I was playing it cool and acting like I really did not see him but I did. He said I need to date other people so guess what... Im dating other people. He looked shocked

    I have been telling myself, he is not coming back all weekend long. I just kept telling myself that and trying to convince myself to believe it. I have to do this everyday
  • Dec 15, 2008, 05:01 PM
    TrueFaith

    Take it day by day and you will be fine good luck
  • Dec 15, 2008, 10:28 PM
    talaniman

    Way to handle yourself.
  • Dec 15, 2008, 11:05 PM
    kp2171
    You are on solid ground.

    I know, it feels like crap... been there myself. First big love (6+years together) took me almost 2 years to get over.

    I don't know. I've lost a few big loves in my life... twice when I walked away... I still loved them, but the timing was wrong or they were wrong... yet I always secretly wondered if they ever thought about me, missed me, felt bad for how they hurt me... its normal to go through this.

    You can love a person that you cannot be with. Again... been there myself more than once.

    What was he thinking? Probably all you imagined. Most of us would love to think our ex's regret our absence. Its natural and normal.
  • Dec 15, 2008, 11:07 PM
    debdoes

    You are strong! Wow, impressive! That really must have felt great for you to have him see you with another guy, moving on, and not wating around for him. Nice!
  • Mar 8, 2009, 12:25 PM
    9Lives
    Love does not mean ANYTHING if he don't treat you right
    I have been in a off and on relationship for 4 yrs. I realize now that I love him but I don't like the way he treats me. He is a Gemini, he is sweet but not consistent. It is like when it is good it is great.. when it is bad.. it is bad. I crave him when we are separated but when we are together, he stress me out with his ways.

    My friend told me

    LOVE Don't MEAN ANYTHING IF HE DOES NOT TREAT YOU RIGHT

    She tells me, you can love someone that does not treat you. You have to separate the two which I had a hard time REALIZING. If they don't treat you right... regardless of how you feel about him, you have to back up or back out. One or the other!!

    Does this make sense?
  • Mar 8, 2009, 12:56 PM
    MiSSsy111222

    Yep makes sense to me, but sometime we become blind to our partners faults, we ignore the negative and try to find the positive. You would be surprised by the amount of people who are unhappy for the sake of love.

    But importantly are you taking this advice?
  • Mar 8, 2009, 12:58 PM
    miss shopaholic

    What is it that you crave about him exactly?
  • Mar 8, 2009, 01:04 PM
    9Lives
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by MiSSsy111222 View Post
    yep makes sense to me, but sometime we become blind to our partners faults, we ignore the negative and try to find the positive. you would be suprised by the amount of people who are unhappy for the sake of love.

    But importantly are you taking this advice?


    Yes I am. As stupid as this sounds, I was not mentally processing it that way. I am one of the people was putting love in front of treating me right. Treat me right if you love me for real. Anything else is bull/sh/t!!

    Yeah, I got it now
  • Mar 8, 2009, 01:06 PM
    9Lives
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by miss shopaholic View Post
    What is it that you crave about him exactly?

    His time, his attention, his body, his voice. HIM HIM HIM
  • Mar 8, 2009, 04:24 PM
    9Lives
    Women who have dated a Gemini Man


    I have dated a Gem man and it is crazy love. I love him but he is so inconsistent. First of all, he always got to be doing something. He can't sit down and chill. He always got to be going somewhere. He can be fun and exciting but then his twin comes out and he is mean, selfish, and hard to get along with. We have been going up and down so many times that it is just time to turn in the towel.

    Has anyone else dated a Gemini Man? What is your experience?
  • Mar 8, 2009, 04:27 PM
    J_9
    I don't think this has to be strictly because he is a Gemini, this is his personality, for better or worse. Many people of different signs have this personality.

    Either learn to live with it, or kick him to the curb and find a man that treats you well.
  • Mar 8, 2009, 04:35 PM
    9Lives
    Quote:

    J_9;1592233]I don't think this has to be strictly because he is a Gemini, this is his personality, for better or worse. Many people of different signs have this personality.

    Either learn to live with it, or kick him to the curb and find a man that treats you well.
    I can't live with it. He stress me out. I just want to know has anyone date a Gemini and what was their experience
  • Mar 8, 2009, 04:43 PM
    MsMewiththat

    I have been friends with a Gemini man for 12 years and WHOA! Very true about the twin. Although many people won't believe or agree that Gemini people can be very hot and cold it is SO true. Yes there are other people in this world with the same personality type Gemini's got it bad. I agree with what is being said about moving on if it's not what you need. Don't waste time and energy, chances of him changing are slim to none.
  • Mar 8, 2009, 04:52 PM
    9Lives
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by MsMewiththat View Post
    I have been friends with a Gemini man for 12 years and WHOA! Very true about the twin. Although many people won't believe or agree that Gemini people can be very hot and cold it is SO true. Yes there are other people in this world with the same personality type Gemini's got it bad. I agree with what is being said about moving on if it's not what you need. Don't waste time and energy, chances of him changing are slim to none.

    That's what Im saying. People don't understand,. Gemini men have it BAD BAD BAD. I have dealt with him for 4 years. We will be doing great. Loving and fun. Then one day... here comes that TWIN. I hate it! It is so twisted that you think you couldn't have met a better man so sweet and loving. Then here comes that other mean mutha fu/ker.
    It is a big roller coaster ride. It has taken me a long long long time to let him go. He stress me out

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