I'm 18 years old and I lost my virginity to my fwb (friends with benefits) he would be rough and would ram through me even though I said to be gentle. I stopped talking to him and I have a boyfriend who I've been with for a while. Yesterday he fingered me and it hurt but that was because I was tense. So I would try to relax and then it would feel good. I told my boyfriend that it hurt once the pain was unbearable. He was scared and upset that I didn't say something until last minute because he wants me to feel good. But he wasn't doing anything wrong, he was completely gentle. I don't know if its just in my head or there's something wrong with me. I do have irregular periods(1-2 weeks early/late) and I haven't seen a gynecologist (never seen one). I'm nervous to tell my mom that I want to go see one, but at the same time its my health and I don't want it to affect me conceiving in the future. So is the pain all in my head because of my fwb or is there something wrong with me physically?

It might not be in your head... so you really do need to see a gynecologist. There are a few conditions that can legitimately make it very painful for you. But they need treated by a professional.