My boyfriend constantly threatens to leave me and it scares me so much, please help?
Okay, my boyfriend is 20 and I'm 17. We've been together for 19 months and this is both mine and his first actual relationship.
I'm not a perfect girlfriend, I get moody easily, and moan at him for insignificant things etc. But I do love him so much. I guess I fuss at him so much because I don't feel like he appreciates me enough. I would never hurt him in any way but he's happy to hurt me: cancelling our plans, putting time with his friends before me, lying to me, hiding things from me, ignoring me, etc.
About a year ago the cycle of "I'm breaking up with you, actually I didn't mean it I love you so much" began. It must have happened about 5 or 6 times. It was so heartbreaking and confusing every time. Sometimes he had a legitimate reason, like I was arguing with him too much, but other times he really didn't. I wasn't strong enough to leave him.
Then after a while he broke up with me "for real". We went on a break instead and stayed together, but the relationship was so afterwards. He ignored me loads, kept saying he wanted more space and was having doubts about us, and I felt so damn worthless. Still... I stayed :(
We're still together now and we really do have the best of times. We can talk for hours on end about serious things or complete nonsense, we make each other laugh so much, he tells me how beautiful I am and how me he loves me nearly every day and our sex life is awesome.
But... every time we have a tiny argument I'm scared he wants to break up with me. He mentioned it again only last month but assured me afterwards he didn't mean it, he only said it because we weren't getting on very well (not having good conversations in person) and he didn't know how to fix it.
Please someone tell me what to do, I love him so very much at the minute, more than I ever have, but I can't shake the resentment of all the many horrible things he's done.