I am 29 years old and have been with my husband for the last 9 years, we have been married for 5. My husband works abroad and we see each other for 2 months every 6-7 months. Half of this 2 months is spent fighting and I believe its because we are so very different. Our goals in life are different. He wants kids and we fight about it all the time. I want my career first, I am an auditor and I believe that I can wait a few more years, maybe 2-3 before having kids. He's 32 and thinks he 's old and wants them now. His family don't like me, they think a married woman should be home in the kitchen and with the babies, while the man works. Having kids is not the only problem, we are different in every way, we once joked that opposites attract but it doesn't seem funny anymore. I have never been unfaithful to my husband and I have no intention to but lately I have found myself wanting out of the marriage but afraid of what it would mean. I have never failed at anything that I have set my mind to and I can't bear to think that my marriage has failed but I don't know if I want it to work out. I sometimes sit and think I am alone most of the time anyway so nothing would really change. I also consider my nephews age 8 and 12 and my niece age 10 who consider my husband their dad, their father is not around and I don't want to hurt them or disappoint them by getting a divorce. My husband and I have been the stable factor in their lives and I have seen what their parents separation did to them. I don't know what to do, there is no third person involved just me wanting to be happy and I am not. The sad thing is that I know my husband loves me I just don't feel anything or rather I don't love him as before and I don't miss him the way I should when he's not here. The distance has also caused our communication to break down and he loves his job so I would never ask him to leave.
I have been in love with someone else since I am 14. I am now 30. This person was married and have been divorced for 10 years and I still love him. I don't know if the feeling is mutual. I am unhappy in my marriage.
Please help.