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She moved here from nova scotia, and had a boyfriend there, and says that he's still her boyfriend. Unfortunately, he's about six feet tall, and her best friend says he's very good looking. I don't know if they talk much though, because he doesn't have face book or anything like that. Also, this person in her class asked her who she likes, (theres a lot of that arounf our school) and she said that I'm really nice, but also that one of my friends is very attractive. Unfortunately, this guy told lots of people this, and by lunch, everyone was talking about it, saying that I should ask her out. This kind of pissed me off because now, even if I do want to ask her out, I couldn't because it might hurt her feelings. There's a dance coming up somtime in December, and I don't know if I should ask her to it or not. But just as friends.

She moved here from nova scotia, and I don't know if she even still talks to her boyfriend any more, but I don't want to be the guy who recked a relationship. Her boyfriend is about six feet tall, and is apparently very good looking. Also, I told my best friend what I feel about her, and I can tell him anything. The first time I really talked to her, we were sitting alone under this tree, but there were lots of other people around us at the time. There are lots of *******s in my grade, and one of my friends tried to throw an apple at me, (im allergic to them) but he hit her instead! I was about ready to rip off his head,but I couldn't throw the apple back at him because if a teacher saw, id get suspendid.also, I didn't even notice she was crying until after. To make things worse, it was the day after the new iPod touch came out, and someone posted a video of the whole thing on Facebook.(the apple thing) and now everyone kind of knows I like her. Were really good friends now, but I don't know what to do now. Some of the really gossipy girls came up to us and said things lik "so are you two going out yet or what?" then she says that she has a boyfriend, every time and its driving me outa my mind! So I don't even know if she's telling the truth about him or not. Although I know he does excist and that she's not making him up. There is a bright side though, one day, some guy asked her who she liked, and she said that I was really nice, but that one of my good friends is really good looking. (and he's also kind of ripped) so then by lunch, every one was talking about it, so even if I did want to ask her out, I couldn't because it might hurt her feelings. The same gossiopy girls keep asking her questions that she obviously doesn't want to answer, like who she would rather kiss, (me or my friend) and I really just want to tell them to shut up. I know anyone answering my question isn't going to want to read all this, but I have memory loss, and I remember everything she says to me or that I say to her, so I think it means something.

I don't know what Province you are in, but I presume she's moved far from home. And she's left a boyfriend behind- apparently.

Sometimes having a 'boyfriend' is a protective shield. She won't get hit on, or be subject to guys thinking she is 'available', if everybody believes she has a boyfriend. I have told men hitting on me that I was gay, just to get rid of them.

But, if there is a relationship with another person, she has no reason to explain herself to you, or anybody. Unless she is sending signals that she is interested. If she is interested, and the two of you at least talk about it, you will know what's up with her. She will either be available to date, or she won't be available to date. There can't be three people in a relationship, even if the 'boyfriend' happens to be a couple of Provinces away.

I say, ask her to the dance. If she's already checking out the local guys as you said, perhaps she is looking for a friend, or perhaps she is looking for a boyfriend, or then again, perhaps she is looking for a good reason to dump the guy in Nova Scotia who knows.

Until you talk to her, directly, and skip the school gossip, you will never know.

Don't do anything man. She has a boyfriend. Until she's on the market you guys can just be close friends. By the way how old are you guys where gossip is that rampant? She's obviously stressed by the whole situation and the best thing you can do is be her friend.

-Drew

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I would say that it's too early to think about your feelings for her. Just keep being her friend and keep getting to know her better. With all this gossiping around, your friendship with her is going to be very fragile. Why not worry about strengthening a friendship with her first before worrying about a romantic relationship.

Furthermore, be careful no to be too needy with her. Just let things flow naturally and don't force things.

If you feel like being her boyfriend, then don't tease yourself and ask her out "just as friends", you are lying to no one. Yes, it does increase the chance of her saying yes, but what you are trying to accomplish will not happen. You sound young and I don't really see the point of having a girlfriend when your school still has "dances". But, you are entitled to make your own choices, since it is you who is living your life. Regardless of where the boyfriend is, she has one, and that means that she is automatically off limits to you. You can tell her how you feel and what you want, but you are going to have to back off and let her make her own decisions because if you don't you will disrespect her by not respecting her relationship. And that reflects negatively on you. Now, fortunately, she seems to like you a little bit. Also fortunately she has a long distance relationship, in a very likely case, just wait for it to end it shouldn't take long especially when she has her eye on someone. But, just make sure that she makes the choice, do not pressure her into anything because then she will feel like you did that (which you did) and rethink what she is doing.

Good Luck,

Javi

You she is stressed I think because of certain things not worth mentioning. Were both 15 but its just this one group of people that gossip obsesivley and try to screw things up for people and others just talk about it.

I know what you mean, and I trained myself my whole life to forget about emotions, and I'm very good at it, but I tried to forget about my feelings so I could focus on becoming her friend but its hard to forget about postitive emotions because I nvr tried

No ofense intendid but how have I pressured her to rethinking anything? And her boyfriend sounds like a nice guy, and someone I would probably end up being really good friends with.

Oh and the dance isn't from the school. One of my friends and some of her friends are organising it.

She obviously isn't too loyal to her boyfreind in Nova Scotia, how would you trust her to be loyal to you?

The thing is, no one even knows if he really is her boyfriend. But if he is, she's not ditching him in any way, she's pretty adimant about it, and its not like she's even really that into anyone els she was also nervous when people askd her dum questions

Its very difficult for me to talk to her without other people around, but do you have any sugestions on to how to talk to her in private? Or at least not with other people evesdroping?

What it all boils down to, is having a lot of questions and assumptions, and no substance.

Regardless of how you feel about her, you won't know anything that you can honestly say is truthful, until you talk to her. You have a general idea of her as a person, and that is enough for you to want to know more.

What you don't know is, whether she has a boyfriend, and until she tells you directly, you will never know. As I said in an earlier post, he may be her boyfriend, or he could be a person who does not exist, except to keep people guessing, and at arms' length. Having an imaginary boyfriend (if he is), is a safety valve for her. And a good one really.

If you are to learn about her, you have to start as a friend anyway, and regardless of the 'boyfriend', by not thinking friends first, you could be robbing yourself of adding a great person to your already existing circle. Many of your friends are probably girls, and some have boyfriends, but that doesn't stop them from having you as a friend. I think it is healthy to have both sexes as friends.

By thinking too much into this, based on rumour, and guessing, and being so focused on romantic interest first, you may be putting the horse before the cart.

Why not try to include her as a friend- to parties, school dances, hanging out, etc. and first get to know her. You may have a couple of conversations with her and realize that once you got to know her better, you'd rather have her as a friend anyway. Invest that little bit of time by considering her a new girl to the school, and get to know her better before you make any moves that could alienate her, and prevent a friendship at the same time.

This way, you kill two birds with the same stone. You satisfy your curiosity and interest, and see where that takes you, and, you may just find that she is a better friend, than a prospect for a girlfriend.

Thanks for the advice, but I have seen a picture of this guy, so I know he does exist,

I didn't say you did, I say make sure that you don't.

Ok well she's still with her boyfriend and still in touch with him. I Don't know if I'm angry or sad.

And I didn't ask her to the dance if anyone wanted to know