Husband refuses to resolve issues from deceit after 2 years
My husband has deceived me financially for the past 7 years of our 27 year marriage. He has refused to discuss the origin of the financial issues, does not respond to my needs for resolution and trust, refuses to acknowledge my needs or feelings, and is very indifferent toward our relationship. He has become verbally/emotionally abusive. When I tell him I have had enough and need to leave, he becomes loving and makes promises to work on issues. When I bring the issues up or express needs, he again becomes annoyed, angry, self absorbed, makes excuses not to share information, says I am too needy, forgets important financial information, continues to lie about bills, then says I am accusing him of lying when confronted. He blames me for tension and all his physical problems; fatigue, elevated blood sugar, elevated blood pressure,. He has told me he understands I can't trust him yet does not need to rebuild trust. He tells me I should just forget it all and move on; he says he has resolved the marital issues on his own. I feel I am on a roller coaster of emotions and living in limbo as I have no idea of financial situation, do not know if he is committed to the marriage, I cannot make any decisions, and have no options. He was never like this, we always had a respectful, loving marriage. He has changed drastically and his communication with me is filled with contempt, anger, and defensiveness. We have become distant during the past 2 years from refusal to address any issues. He will not think about us, has not read any books or articles I thouth may help us. I cannot continue to live like this, but we have 4 children and I do not want to break up our family. We have become very distant and the intimacy, trust, caring, respect in our marriage has been destroyed. I feel I cannot continue as the pain has absorbed so much of me, yet I do not want to give up and break up my family. I have 4 children to consider. I also cannot face the fact that he has no feelings for me and is not affected by the deterioration of our marriage. If I give up, it will be the end of 29 years together, if I stay, I will continue to deteriorate and lose self respect, esteem, confidence,. What should I do?