Woman husband knocked up wants us to have the baby when born
The story:
All right, my husband had sex with another woman while we were takign some time apart to think. He got her pregnant. Now this woman didn't want the baby. Has said all along that she would get an abortion cause she can't handle the responsibility and does have the money or patience to be a mom. Fair enough right? But he doesn't want her to abort the baby, and would much rather take the baby once it's born. And I agree with that. (The air has cleared around us). She's now too far to have an abortion and has told us since it's too late to abort she wants us to take the baby and wants nothing to do with it. Basically pretend like it never existed. I don't understand how she can due that, since I could never have done that to either of my children. Now she's 7.5 months along and we've started looking at it more logically.
The question:
We don't want to do this through court, and without a lawyer preferably. Since if she changes her mind and wants to keep the baby after all, good for her right!? Since he is the birth father he theoretically has the right to take the baby home from the hospital after it's born right? And she has the ability of signing off her parental rights in the hospital. But where do I sit through all this? We've come to terms with this, are working forward, but if we are going to be taking this child from this woman, I believe in raising the baby as our own.
By saying that, as his wife but not birth mother, would I be assuming custody after she signs off her parental rights? And since I have a full time job, would I be able for parental leave since it would be a newborn (and god knows my husband doesn't know what to do, even though we have two beautiful children of our own). What about EI?
Please reply, but be kind. I am not asking because of being clueless, I am simply asking for some advice.