I am so worked up I just need to vent to someone--my husband and I have been married for 25 years. 3 years ago his widowed father became terminally ill and died--it took a long time to sell the house in this market (1 1/2 years) during that time my husband reverted back to being a pot smoking teenager with his loser brother. Husband has 3 brothers --the 2 not living here are good guys --have their masters in their field . My husband is a good guy --doesn't do anything wrong with the law--goes to work, good father. Well, his one brother that lives in our town is a loser --was addicted to cocaine--was caught selling --tried went to 1 year rehab for that. Does not work, lives with the latest girlfriends who are lonely(he is 52) never pays taxes. Back to my husband--his work brought on big account---they had everyone drug tested -he tested for pot--now for people saying "whats the big deal" it is for some companies and my husband should have known that! He now has to be out of work 2 to 4 weeks--go to counseling( which I am not upset about)--This happened 22 years ago when we were first married --we applied for mortgage and it showed a 3,000 dollar loan--found out he was staying home from his job and smoking pot with his loser brother--he was fired back then--I went to my husband's mother back then and we went down to her loser son's apartment to yell at him to not drag my husband down. Of course I can't blame my brother in law for it all--its my husband reposibilty. Our kids are in college now--both made the dean's list --when their father was hanging out at "pot house" with uncle steven--I said a little to them I don't like this--my daughter was mad at me "Jee mom, I like that dad is hanging out with his brother --he went through a rough time with grandpa's death" so you know I sat back , and look what mess this is in---I told him I cannot be sitting here always thinking he is meeting someone for a joint---his office will be testing again--I am a registered Nurse of 28 years and it got by me. Anybody got any advice for me? I am really down right now.

He's lucky to have not been fired. Maybe this will be an eye opener for him. Today's job market doesn't have a lot of alternatives for the recently unemployed, so I wish him luck. For you, I also hope that GOD grants you strength and serenity at this trying time. Remember that things can always be worse.

Maybe he should stay away from the brother, for now.

Not sure what to say except that there's no fool like an old fool.

My Ex got caught drink driving a while ago and lost his driving license for 12 months. He had to attend 2 months counseling and rehab and it did him the world of good.

Perhaps the same thing will happen to your husband - they often take greater heed of the authorities than their wives!

Being exposed through his work might just be the kick in the butt that he needs.