Ask Me Help Desk - How do I confront him?

How do I confront him?

I recently found out that the man I've been sleeping with was sleeping with another women. I cursed him out. Maybe I had no right to do so because there was no formal commitment between us. Still in all I felt that he should have had enough respect for me to tell me that this was what he was doing. I apologized for the hateful things I said and he forgave me and said he would be in touch soon. I need to know how I can bring this topic up to find out if this other person is still in the picture. I would like to know only to make a better informed decision on whether to continue seeing him.

I wouldn't want to see him again; once a cheater, always a cheater. If I were you, the only thing I would worry about right now is getting to the doctor to be checked for STDs. You have no idea where he has been. Informed decision my butt, why would you even want to look at him again.

How long have you been sleeping together? If you are not in a relationship he didn't cheat on you but it would have been respectful to tell you this...

You already have enough to make an informed decision. He has someone else to sleep with, and no matter what is said, you will always wonder, where he is, and who he is with. Not a good way to start or build a relationship, and its not even cheating, since there was no commitment. What else do you really need to know?

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Originally Posted by confused63

I recently found out that the man I've been sleeping with was sleeping with another women.

This surprised you? I've never met the guy... or maybe I have I don't know and I'm not surprised that a guy would sleep around when he's single, you know because he's single and you put out without asking for a commitment first. Sorry lady that's not his fault.

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Originally Posted by confused63

I cursed him out. Maybe I had no right to do so because there was no formal commitment between us.

And you didn't. If you want a real relationship maybe you ought to bring up your own standards and not worry about his.

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Originally Posted by confused63

Still in all I felt that he should have had enough respect for me to tell me that this was what he was doing.

He had to tell you, a woman he has no ties to, that he was having sex with a woman? I didn't ask the lady who bagged my grocery's tonight who was bagging her because I have no ties to her and it's none of my business, just like a guy you willingly give it up to with no demands on him for a commitment.

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Originally Posted by confused63

I apologized for the hateful things i said

Good start.

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Originally Posted by confused63

and he forgave me

Good guy, most guys wouldn't have.

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Originally Posted by confused63

and said he would be in touch soon.

I would hold my breathe.

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Originally Posted by confused63

I need to know how I can bring this topic up to find out if this other person is still in the picture.

You mean the other person who has nothing to do with you? That's none of your business and until you start demanding a little more from yourself and quit sleeping with people who use your own weakness against you then it will remain none of your business.

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Originally Posted by confused63

I would like to know only to make a better informed decision on whether or not to continue seeing him.

I question why he would continue seeing you after this to be honest. If you want to screw him then get a commitment, if you don't he's free to do what he pleases and if you can't accept that then it is you who needs to reevaluate who is wrong here.