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-   -   Give up my sex lifestyle to have a man or no? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=155731)

  • Nov 25, 2007, 09:12 AM
    packer2007
    Give up my sex lifestyle to have a man or no?
    I met a guy several weeks ago. We get along great. Seems to be something there. We both want marriage again someday. I t just feels real good between us. He calls several times, see's me, is caring, loving, protective(a cop by the way), honest, doesn't drink nor smoke and loves sex. One thing is our sexual lifestyles, opposites(hes into swinging, etc and I am not, I want 1 on 1) He seems to think things could work for us. I don't know. Would any of you out there continue with this relationship and set aside the differences on sex or would you run and hope to find Mr Right or somebody along that line? (we are both in our 40's, divorced)(I have met so many Mr Wrongs that I feel maybe I should just go with him and have a man in my life and take a chance or is that being foolish?)
  • Nov 25, 2007, 09:23 AM
    excon
    Hello packer:

    I don't know. It's not like he likes chocolate and you like vanilla. Could you screw a guy while your old man was screwing some beautiful young chick right in front of you?? If you can, then marry him. If you can't, then don't.

    excon
  • Nov 25, 2007, 09:44 AM
    N0help4u
    Dump him find 1 on 1. How could you ever be happy knowing he is devaluing your values by being with anybody else? 1 on 1 is for a reason! Don't hurt yourself to please him when it is evident that 'ANYONE can please him'
  • Nov 25, 2007, 10:29 AM
    stonewilder
    You only met him "several weeks ago" there is still plenty of time to learn he might not be the man you think he is. My point is if you are going to dump him for his lifestyle this would be the time to do it. If you were to fall in love with him, ask yourself this... Could I handle the one I love having sex with another woman? If the answer is no save yourself and dump him now!
  • Nov 25, 2007, 10:59 AM
    shygrneyzs
    That difference in sex is no small difference. That is his preferred lifestyle and will he hold that against you if you two keep in the relationship and you tell him to give up the swinging? A few years after my divorce I met a guy like that - we were compatible in many ways and he and my youngest son really got along well. But he finally told me his "secret" and that was a swinging lifetsyle. Said he and his late wife were into it and he loved it. He explained it all to me and said it would be my preference but if I declined the invitations, that meant he would not get the invitations or he would get less than what he wanted. At least he was honest.

    I had to say no, I was not going that way. If he wanted that, fine, then he needed to find a woman who felt the same way. Funny thing - he said he had found a woman who felt the same way about swinging but she would not have anything to do with a committed relationship. Takes all kinds to make the world, doesn't it?
  • Nov 25, 2007, 12:11 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    Never work
  • Nov 25, 2007, 12:46 PM
    cerisa
    Why would you debase yourself, and allow him to debase you by saying you are not enough? What next? You are not good enough on your honeymoon, not a lot to look forward to in the long run.

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