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-   -   Letting go of dad (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=152239)

  • Nov 14, 2007, 09:05 PM
    perfect_butterfli
    Letting go of dad
    My children have a father who really wants nothing to do with them. So I was wondering how I go about getting him to remove his parental rights. Him and I have talked about it but he has not given me an answer yet. He told me he has thought about letting them go for good. Where do I start when he's completely ready to let go. We live in Colorado. Please help me. My husband wants to adopt them also!
  • Nov 14, 2007, 09:14 PM
    charlotte234s
    You have to have the real father agree sign over his rights. You can consult a family lawyer for help with that.
  • Nov 14, 2007, 11:59 PM
    oneguyinohio
    I personally know of a similar situation. It kind of sucks as far as a father being that way as far as I am concerned, but the guy was way behind on child support and thought that was his way out... anyways, it involved lawyers and legal papers that had to be signed and approved by a judge. I think they spent at least 3 thousand in legal fees, so I'd start asking legal advice. It might be cheaper if it is all voluntary and doesn't involve a lot of court stuff... the case I mentioned involved the real father not showing up to court and causing numerous delays which all cost extra legal fees... he seemed to think that the longer he stalled the more child support he could get away with not paying when things were final... It all backfired on him, and he was held responsible for half the legal fees and also all of the back child support. I didn't know him at all, but only what the child's mother told me. Also, as in all the legal stuff, I'm sure it is different in every state.
  • Nov 15, 2007, 08:48 AM
    needadvicenj
    Hi sorry about what your going threw... I myself am dealing with a similar situation. You can get help with the legal aid in your state.and make sure as much as you dislike your ex do not bad mouth him in any way in front of your children... trust me its hard I know but in the end it will help u. my ex wants nothing to do with my daughter just to make my life hell. In time your kids will learn the truth but for now stay strong and happy. Good luck
  • Nov 15, 2007, 09:04 AM
    macksmom
    As Charlotte said, you will have to have the bio father willingly relinquish his parental rights in order for you husband to adopt.

    As as far as where you need to start... with the bio father. It's up to him.
  • Nov 15, 2007, 10:15 AM
    ScottGem
    There are a number of threads here that all say the same thing there is also a sticky note in the Family Law forum about it. I suggest you look at them.

    The bottomline here is that relinquishing parental rights is a difficult business. It is rarely granted and when it is, its almost always to pave the way for the adoption of the child by a stepparent or adoptive parents.

    So the fact that your husband wants to adopt bodes well for you. You need to file a petition for adoption with your local Family court. You will need to get an attorney to do that. That attorney will also take care of the paperwork for the father to relinquish his rights.

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