I don't know what to do about this.
I, (if you read my previous questions) have had it pretty crap with men so far. Who hasn't I guess.
However, I have been in an amazing relationship with an amazing man for the last few years. He treats me so well, takes me out on trips and holidays, makes sure I know that he loves me, and all was well.
Basically... It's been three years now and I am 33 and he is 35. I kind of asked him if he would be interested in moving in with me. He said no, because he doesn't like the idea of living with a cat. This kind of took me by surprise as he adores my cat, who is called Bowie. Like he loves him. Rubs is head off him, picks him up and plays with him all the time. When he said no because of this reason, I kind of didn't take it too well and we had a big argument in which he assured me that it wasn't me, it was the cat and sometimes cat hair. I asked him what does he mean by this exactly, that I have to give up my cat or wait until he dies or what? WHAT THE HELL? He said "I dont know". By the way, he still lives with his parents.
So anyway, still being hurt, we were having sex and it literally took me about an hour of fooling around with him to get him in the mood that morning, and when he finally was in the mood, he climbed on top of me and it was all over instantly. Sometimes this is an issue with him, but I'm always very understanding and tell him that it's OK and that I'm actually flattered. Its not always like this either so whatever, the sex is mostly good. But this particular morning, probably due to him telling me he doesn't want to live with me because of a cat, I lost it and said some bad things. Bad things while he was still lying on top of me. Bad things about his performance.
Since this particular morning, he has been so strange with me. Nitpicking at everything I do, like I went on holidays with him and he just complained about how I cleaned the dishes in cold water (there was no hot water or kettle). Just nitpicking. I asked him to stop doing this. It makes me feel like Im not good enough.
He ignored me for a few days completely and now he's acting really aloof and distant, I've apologised profusely and I spent the entire time he was ignoring me crying. I don't know why I exploded at him like this, and I regret what I said. All he has said to me since is, it's OK but everything is "a little grey" right now.
Oh my god. Please help, I am so lost as to how to fix this. I love him. I don't want to break up over a bad sex incident and I don't know what to do. I think I really hurt him. But I don't know how to explain that he made me feel so inadequate that dayWhat can I do?