Okay, time for a cat joke;

The Cat and The Husband

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A man absolutely hated his wife's cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park. As he arrived home, the cat was walking up the driveway.

The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He put the beast out and headed home. Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat!

He kept taking the cat further and further, and the cat would always beat him home. At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there.

Hours later the man calls home to his wife: "Jen, is the cat there?"

"Yes", the wife answers, "why do you ask?"

Frustrated, the man answered, "Put the little bastard on the phone, I'm lost and need directions."

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Originally Posted by Altenweg

Okay, time for a cat joke;

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Cute one!!


Okay, hope you have a day or two for this list, heehee (As you will see... I am an animal personal all around)

At my home currently...
2 Cats (Tabby and Jezebel) and a Gecko (no name... just gecko, lol)
Tabby is an adopted cat from a vet drop off.. roughly 11 years ago... Jezebel was the "loose" cat that would not leave my job about 4 years ago... someone had to take her :)
The gecko was bought from a breeder about 1 year ago


Left at mom's years ago (I was afraid age and stress of a move would kill them)

3 cats (Rascal, LuLu, and Munchkin) Rascal=stray/17 years old... LuLu=stray/6years old... Munchkin=just kind of appeared two years ago (mom's only animal, lol)

1 dog (Maddie) Airedale terrier... 11 years old... purchased from breeder

1 Bird (African Grey) Misty/ 6 years old... bought from breeder




Yes, I took in every homeless animal as a youngin! Mom hated it... probably even more now that she got "stuck" with most of them, lol.

Rpg, thanks for the freerice.com link.

I have an inflatable sheep named Sheepie. Does that count? Well... I guess she's more like family than a pet. Lol.

Mafiaangel - TMI (Too much info). Now I'm picturing you with this inflatable sheep, the images aren't good. AHHHHH!;)

I once found an unidentified critter in the back yard when I was a child, as far as we could tell it was a cross between a hamster and a rat. The poor thing was dying and my Dad and I tried to nurse it back to health, it didn't last a day and is buried in the backyard. My Dad was great, he even bought me a pet mouse once, Mom wasn't at all pleased about that.

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Originally Posted by Altenweg

Mafiaangel - TMI (Too much info). Now I'm picturing you with this inflatable sheep, the images aren't good. AHHHHH!;)

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Hahahaha :) If you're interested in pics let me know. Muahahahaha.

AGHHHH! No pictures, although they can't be any worse than the ones in my head.

This IS my cat... YouTube - Wake up Cat

And yet, I'm still a cat person...

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Originally Posted by Altenweg

AGHHHH! No pictures, although they can't be any worse than the ones in my head.

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LMAO, they aren't that BAAAAAH-D!!


Lol couldn't resist.

HC - I'm still laughing, too cute.

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Originally Posted by mafiaangel180

LMAO, they aren't that BAAAAAH-D!!!!!!


lol couldn't resist.

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Hee, Hee, Thanks I needed that. Although the thoughts in my head are still tormenting me at least I can laugh about it. That's a good sign, right? I'm not going insane, right? Someone tell me I'm okay. Is anybody out there?? :p

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Altenweg

Hee, Hee, Thanks I needed that. Although the thoughts in my head are still tormenting me at least I can laugh about it. That's a good sign, right? I'm not going insane, right? Someone tell me I'm okay. Is anybody out there?????:p

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You are totally crazy! But that's OK... you're in good company. :D

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Altenweg

Hee, Hee, Thanks I needed that. Although the thoughts in my head are still tormenting me at least I can laugh about it. That's a good sign, right? I'm not going insane, right? Someone tell me I'm okay. Is anybody out there?????:p

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Lol... Lets consider the elements:

Blow up
Sheep
Picture

Yeah... I'd say that you're not insane... :)

Course, the elements in MY head at the moment are:

Cute Guy
Canadian
Snowplow
Caffeine

Not much better!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by HistorianChick

Lol.... Lets consider the elements:

Blow up
Sheep
Picture

Yeah.... I'd say that you're not insane.... :)

Course, the elements in MY head at the moment are:

Cute Guy
Canadian
Snowplow
Caffeine

Not much better!

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I saw her sitting all lonely on a shelf at Spencer's. She was a discount item for crying out loud!! What can I say... I have a soft spot for homeless and unwanted animals.

HC - Have I filled your head with thoughts of burly, brunette, muscled, cute, Canadian snow plow drivers? At least it's better than sheep. :p

Mafia - I'm feeling better now, really, don't call the men with the padded van and the jacket that does up in the back, I'm fine now. You do believe me right?:D

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Altenweg

HC - Have I filled your head with thoughts of burly, brunette, muscled, cute, Canadian snow plow drivers? At least it's better than sheep. :p

Mafia - I'm feeling better now, really, don't call the men with the padded van and the jacket that does up in the back, I'm fine now. You do believe me right?:D

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I won't make the call as long as you don't make the call. Lol.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by mafiaangel180

I saw her sitting all lonely on a shelf at Spencer's. She was a discount item for crying out loud!!!! What can I say....I have a soft spot for homeless and unwanted animals.

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Spencers? You bought a blow up sheep at Spencers... wow... Mafiaangel... you're awesome. :D I still think my Mother is going to spank me if I go into Spencers... and I'm 28! Sheesh!

HC - The spanking comment is only going to put thoughts into Mafia's head, after all, who owns the blow up sheep? Lol.

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Originally Posted by HistorianChick

Spencers?? You bought a blow up sheep at Spencers.... wow..... Mafiaangel... you're awesome. :D I still think my Mother is going to spank me if I go into Spencers.... and I'm 28!! Sheesh!

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Yep, god I love the shock factor I get toting her around. Let's put it this way... Sheepie was a big fan of the new Rambo movie.

Seriously. GUYS LOVE THE SHEEP.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Altenweg

HC - The spanking comment is only going to put thoughts into Mafia's head, after all, who owns the blow up sheep? lol.

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OUT DAMN THOUGHTS OUT!!

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Originally Posted by mafiaangel180

OUT DAMN THOUGHTS OUT!!!!!

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LOLOL!! That's right, MA, bring in Shakespeare... wow... :D

Come on over to my Coffeeshop... https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/other-...ee-189285.html

Yes Mafia, join HC's coffee house, otherwise we're going to get in trouble for sabotaging this thread, even though I know Fallen won't be too mad, she and I get into trouble all the time.

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Originally Posted by Altenweg

Yes Mafia, join HC's coffee house, otherwise we're going to get in trouble for sabotaging this thread, even though I know Fallen won't be too mad, she and I get into trouble all the time.

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Ack!! Don't want to sabotage it!! Sorry Fallen!! :)

The Truth about Dogs:


A dog is truly a man's best friend.
If you don't believe it, just try this experiment.

Put your dog and your wife in the trunk of the car for an hour.

When you open the trunk, who is really happy to see you?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by magprob

The Truth about Dogs:


A dog is truly a man's best friend.
If you don't believe it, just try this experiment.

Put your dog and your wife in the trunk of the car for an hour.

When you open the trunk, who is really happy to see you?

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This is the honest truth. :D

Basenjis and the particular Chihuahua I have don't smell like dogs. (Doggie odor makes me nauseous.) Are there any other breeds that don't smell? Don't be telling me that stuff about how they don't smell when they're clean. The same line applies to women's crotches.

Dog people have been telling me for years how dumb my cats are. I finally got a dog and gee, dogs are just animals too. True, cats don't attack burglars or bark but they are reliable as far as telling me someone is in the driveway. One of my cats has different communications as to who has arrived. All of my cats knows it's name, and 4 out of 5 come when I call them. I love having dogs now though, but they aren't all that smart. They are very different than cats.

Parrots are so smart it's scary sometimes. One of ours seems to read my mind. He will say random things that I am thinking, out of the blue. He's an African Gray. He will never be more intelligent than a 5-year-old human child but sometimes... Wow, my jaw drops and I just stare at him, "what did you say?" Then he says, "trouble?"

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Originally Posted by simoneaugie

Dog people have been telling me for years how dumb my cats are. I finally got a dog and gee, dogs are just animals too. True, cats don't attack burglars or bark but they are reliable as far as telling me someone is in the driveway. One of my cats has different communications as to who has arrived. All of my cats knows it's name, and 4 out of 5 come when I call them. I love having dogs now though, but they aren't all that smart. They are very different than cats.

Parrots are so smart it's scary sometimes. One of ours seems to read my mind. He will say random things that I am thinking, out of the blue. He's an African Gray. He will never be more intelligent than a 5-year-old human child but sometimes...Wow, my jaw drops and I just stare at him, "what did you say?" Then he says, "trouble?"

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I know what you mean simone,the cats we used to have were such wonderful ones.Knew when we called their names,may times even answer with a meow.One of them always let us know when it arrives home,would call,search out one of us and only then go and eat their food.It was so cute.

I love it when cats curl up on my lap or at my feet.Cats are so much fun,they are playful no matter how big they get (not just kittens).

I love birds too but never had a chance to keep one.If I were to keep birds, I want the luxury of having a huge open space where I can let them roam freely and fly around trees and be their natural selves.
For this same reason I don't have a cat now:(.Maybe someday when I have some space.

YouTube - Talking Parrot

That's what my Misty (african grey) looks and sounds like, Firmy. She really talks like that too. She likes to scare my mom, hollering like it is me at my mom's house... mom will start talking to me... and I am not there, hahahahahaha.

And, I will have to say my cats are pretty darn smart. The little floozy one (:D ) can open doors... if they are unlocked... so the dead bolt has to always be set around her, lol. And you better watch it... my 17 pounder (Tabby) will attack worse than any ankle biter, lol.

In my house there is a dog and 4 cats. But that's not my choice ; you can thank my wife and kids for that one. Personally I'm a goldfish person. Nobody can accuse me of not making sacrifices for my family!

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Originally Posted by rpg219

That's what my Misty (african grey) looks and sounds like, Firmy. She really talks like that too. She likes to scare my mom, hollering like it is me at my mom's house....mom will start talking to me....and I am not there, hahahahahaha.

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Wow... sure would like to hear her sometime.

I had 2 chow chows, but they have both passed on. One in 2005 & one in 2006. They were both 14 years old when they died. My female "Roxi" was the sweetest most gentle dog I had ever known. I really miss her. I still have a cat, "Chubs".. . He is a persian and is absolutley a pain in the butt.. . But I love him anyway. I guess I am more of a dog person

Cat!!

I'm more of a kitty lover but dogs are awesome!! :)

I love cat and dogs equally, I've always loved nature and all animals.

Sure would love to post pics once I get my new computer. Having trouble.

I love both cats and dogs. I have a beautiful Calico. She is 13 and healthy. I rescued her. I am highly allergic but do what I have to. She was about to be put to sleep. I also feed 2 other cats. 1 of those 2 won't let me too close. The other of the 2 is very affectionate. One is definitely a stray. The other I am still not sure has a home but my doors are open.

Long black haired cat w/green eyes. The other is black and white spotted. Looks like a miniature version of my cat except doesn't have gold/tan.

I had a dog for 16 years and that was pretty tough when I lost her. Have also lost another cat back in 2006. My dog was 1/2 beagle and 1/2 hot doggie. The cat that passed was a gray tabby. Adopted also.

I like both dogs and cats I have trained dogs and have a friend who is a Labrador I also befriend cats. I don't have an animal living with me as I consider I have lost enough friends and prefer to befriend other people's pets and don't wish to lose any more of my own pets

I am an all around animal person! I prefer to own dogs though. The idea of an animal doing it's business in a box in my house just doesn't sit well with me ;)

I have two dogs - both rescues. One is a Bully mix, here in Nova Scotia we call them Valley Bulls, named Fischer and I have a boxer mix named Lady.

I also have have three gerbils -- what was that about me not wanting to clean up animal business in my house? -- They were rescues as well, and my daughter had been pestering me for two years for some sort of furry rodent. My daughter named them Ramona, Princess Fiona and Sir Nibbler Von Nibbles the second (even though all three are girls).

I have two hermit crabs, Herman and Hermoise. I know not very original lol
And a tank filled with guppies, tetras and platys.

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Originally Posted by Aurora_Bell

I am an all around animal person! I prefer to own dogs though. The idea of an animal doing it's business in a box in my house just doesn't sit well with me ;)

I have two dogs - both rescues. One is a Bully mix, here in Nova Scotia we call them Valley Bulls, named Fischer and i have a boxer mix named Lady.

I also have have three gerbils -- what was that about me not wanting to clean up animal business in my house??-- They were rescues as well, and my daughter had been pestering me for two years for some sort of furry rodent. My daughter named them Ramona, Princess Fiona and Sir Nibbler Von Nibbles the second (even tho all three are girls).

I have two hermit crabs, Herman and Hermoise. I know not very original lol
And a tank filled with guppies, tetras and platys.

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And when Marty and Bo have their first clutch, you're getting a cockatiel. Right? :)

Haha oh sure why not throw one more in there!

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Originally Posted by Aurora_Bell

Haha oh sure why not throw one more in there!

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I'll build you a cage for it. This is the one I'm going to build for Marty and Bo.

Google Image Result for http://www.monica-hagen.com/bilder/bur/ferdig2.jpg

Just find an old wardrobe, it has to be tall, and I can make it. You'll have the coolest bird cage in town. :)