Ask Me Help Desk - Shame or not?

All due respect, exactly what is your "friends" problem? Without input for her, everyone is going in circles. As we all feel attractions to those around us, why is she having such a hard time dealing with her own feelings. Is there a problem beyond just her feelings? I don't get it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

She should stay away from married men, co-workers included.

I see no problem finding someone to be attractive. I know lots of attractive people. I do see it as a problem if it becomes an embarrassment to either party or an inside joke in the workplace.

What exactly ARE her feelings toward him?

Ok here we go.. Wha do you mean by 'stay away'. Did I mentioned that I pestering him?

Quote:

Originally Posted by jmjoseph

This "person" will be viewed as chasing a married man. THAT is something that you do not want. This person will be labeled names that I am sure you can figure out.

It never is a good idea to try to keep an office romance secret in the first place, but when one of the people is married, and not even interested (you didn't say if he was or not), that is viewed as being pathetic by many.

Marriage is a sacred union. Never covet another woman's man. You can look, but it ends there. Don't cross the line.

The world is full of single men, tell this "person" to go out and find one.

Did I say that it is a romance?

Quote:

Originally Posted by talaniman

The flame is what she has to deal with, and that is a test we all take. Her thoughts may be a jumble, but her actions should not be. Thats the real point we humans face all the time, as we are thrown into many social, and professional settings.

Its not unusual at all to feel that others can read your mind, or sense your feelings, when we are in the middle of coping with our own feelings.

Thanks for your answer, I like it!

Quote:

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

OP appears to have a variety of problems in the workplace - this is just one of them.

Can you control yourself? I do control myself but please can you read my question before answering?? :(

Quote:

Originally Posted by Klaipeda

Concentrate on the question please, don't paraphrase my question, please. If you cannot do it without showing yourself as 'being clever', please don't answer as I will not regard it as an answer but because answers are not possible to delete, I disregard them as 'unwise'. I need answers from down to earth people, not from 'clever' not 'having a lot of brains' or 'having a lot of experience'. Each answer I read, I got an Idea straight away what kind of person is writing ( and with what degree of therapy she/ he needs to have) . Look at yourself and if I have enough courage to talk at all, you are not so talkative to share your insecurities with others for the simple anxiety problems.Do not pretend please that you don't have any problems in your life and that you are immune to all kinds of arisen problems that's not true!
All kind of insulting speach I disregard!

I think that it is funny that you continue to try to write in the third person, as if we do not know that the person is ACTUALLY YOU who is CHASING (yes, chasing) a man that is married.

I do not care how you "view" me. If you can figure out "who we are", after reading our posts, then you should already know that it is wrong to chase a married man.

And in addition, you cannot choose who can, and cannot, answer your post.

And I am "down to Earth".

You need help in the worst way, for many of your personal issues. Do not come here and try to insult US, when you are the one in need of assistance.

And I mean professional assistance, by appointment only.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jmjoseph

I know you understood. You're as sharp as Crocodile Dundee's knife.

Guys a bullying is not appropriate place here ( I came back tough, your 'bashing' does not bother me. All bullies are mentally ill..
She is not sharp she is silly.. As simple as that ;(

Quote:

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

OP appears to have a variety of problems in the workplace - this is just one of them.

Wrong! In general- easy going atmosphere, it could be worse as in other workplaces.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

yes, there is alot of shame in "wanting" a married man too much,
She needs to move on to other interest

Please read my question..

Quote:

Originally Posted by talaniman

The flame is what she has to deal with, and that is a test we all take. Her thoughts may be a jumble, but her actions should not be. Thats the real point we humans face all the time, as we are thrown into many social, and professional settings.

Its not unusual at all to feel that others can read your mind, or sense your feelings, when we are in the middle of coping with our own feelings.

I like your answer, thank you!

Quote:

Originally Posted by jmjoseph

JudyKayTee agrees: If you read ALL of her posts she should consider a counselor for several issues. This is just one of them.

Yes, it is indeed a shame.

It takes all kinds doesn't it, Judy?

I'm just glad I'm not the guy at her job.

I would be forced to get a restraining order.

Or a stun gun.

I don't think I will need to fight with my inner feelings towards you if you were my coworker... I'd say the opposite,- YOU WOULD TRY TO BE MY GOOD FRIEND :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by klaipeda

if a woman likes her coovorker and everyone can sence her feeling towards him even though she tries very hard not to show them: Is it a shame for her if she understands that others ( and him himslef) actually can see what's going on inside her,- that others understand that she likes her coleague and he does understand it too? Especially if the person that she feels symphaty for is married?
What should she do? :o

Please read the question carefully and then reply, most of the answers I disregarded as inappropriate!
Thank you

Quote:

Originally Posted by jmjoseph

I think that it is funny that you continue to try to write in the third person, as if we do not know that the person is ACTUALLY YOU who is CHASING (yes, chasing) a man that is married.

I do not care how you "view" me. If you can figure out "who we are", after reading our posts, then you should already know that it is wrong to chase a married man.

And in addition, you cannot choose who can, and cannot, answer your post.

And I am "down to Earth".

You need help in the worst way, for many of your personal issues. Do not come here and try to insult US, when you are the one in need of assistance.

And I mean professional assistance, by appointment only.

OK are you the person in my workplace that you are saying that I am actually chasing him? The question is placed, plese please please read carefully before answering, read Talanimans post and you will see what I mean. If I need an assistance I will get it, all I ask of you that you answer the question exactly in the way it was asked. OK?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Klaipeda

ok are you the person in my workplace that you are saying that I am actually chasing him? The question is placed, please please please read carefully before answering, read Talanimans post and you will see what I mean. If I need an assistance I will get it, all I ask of you that you answer the question exactly in the way it was asked. OK??

Tha's all :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Klaipeda

I don't think I will need to fight with my inner feelings towards you if you were my coworker... I'd say the opposite,- YOU WOULD TRY TO BE MY GOOD FRIEND :)

YOUR inner feelings? I thought it was a "coovorker"

This post should be closed, in my friend's opinion.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jmjoseph

YOUR inner feelings? I thought it was a "coovorker"

This post should be closed, in my friend's opinion.

That's why I asked you -read well first before answering the question. And all posts will be closed if you cannot give appropriate answers to a simpole questions hon;)

Quote:

Originally Posted by jmjoseph

YOUR inner feelings? I thought it was a "coovorker"

This post should be closed, in my friend's opinion.

You think too much and when you think too much you make mistakes..

Klaipeda, your really confusing people and for what purpose. Are you an advice critic?

You ask what should you do? I ask what are you doing? And why is it this is important if your professional at work?

Quote:

Originally Posted by talaniman

Klaipeda, your really confusing people and for what purpose. Are you an advice critic?

You ask what should you do? I ask what are you doing? And why is it this is important if your professional at work?

I don't like people misreading my questions Talaniman and ASSIGNING TO ME WHAT THEY WANT TO ASSIGN.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Klaipeda

you think too much and when you think too much you make mistakes..

Oh, OK. NOW I understand. I think too much. That makes a lot more sense. Let me empty my head and get back to you.