I am 17 years old an am engaged to be married a couple of monthes after I turn 18 to my fiancé who is 19 and will be 20 by the time we marry. When I tell people this they act very shocked and it seems as though they dissaprove. What can I do to reassure them that this is definitely the person I want to spend the rest of my life with and that I am not being immature or hasty about it??

17 is a young age but ignore wat others fink of u getting married. It shouldn't matter to u wat others fink cos its ur life and ur in control of it.
Others may seem jealous of u getting married to ur boyfriend.
Jus concentrate on ur serious relationship and be happy. :)

Hello I'm 20 years old and planning to get married to my 19 year old girl friend in a couple of months also. We have been having the same type of ordeal. I guess that today people don't think that we are able to realize what love is because that we are young. They think that its just a little phase that we are going through. A lot of adults don't believe that we know how hard marriage is but we do we see it all the time. What you need to do is show that you too are going to make it work no matter what. Action is better than talk and after people see what you are doing to make each other happy they will begin to help you instead of bringing you down its true that marriage is hard but if take care of your business everything will be all right.

I wish you the Best!!
If you need anymore advise feel free

I think people just feel like you have your whole life ahead of you... im 20 and I personally cannot imagine myself marrying right now. I've been with my boyfriend for 5 years and we're pretty committed but we don't have plans of marrying until we're both settled.

However... in your case.. I hope everything works out. My question is what is the rush? I have no doubt that you're in love. All I'm saying is I know where other people are coming from... with the high rate of divorce and single parenthood.

But, I do know of cases where young marriages survive. My own parents are a testiment to that being married at 19 (mom) and 21 (dad). 20 years and 4 daughters later.. they're still very much in love.

Anyway, I wish you best of luck. Take care and congratulations

Hello,

I have been reading your debate about the pros and cons of marrying young with great interest.

My name is Nicola and I am working on a Channel 4 documentary about this very topic.

I would love to talk to anyone who married as a teenager or who is planning on getting married young- to talk about how it is all going.

Please feel free to get in contact with me even if its just to find out a bit more information.

Nicola Hurst
[email protected]
020 7317 2230 - ext 250

I'm engaged and I'm 23 years old, and I still have people telling me I'm too young to get married! :P
My advice is to do what your heart tells you. ;D
A friend's relative was married when she was 16, and they have been happily married for 50 years, and counting!

Good Luck!

I'm 16 and I'm getting married on my birthday. I've been with my boyfriend for 3yrs. People are very understanding where I am and my family support me in evrything I do.

As long as you know you are making the right decision for YOU not anyone else ( NOT EVEN YOUR FIANCE).. then go for it. You don't need to live your life for other people.. you need to live it for yourself, hun. You are the only who knows what is right for you. So if people say, oh.. your too young.. tell them they can think that, but all that you want is there support and them backing you. You don't really care about their opinion.

Follow your heart!
Good luck :D

First of all you can't reassure anyone of anything. Personally I could never get married so young but that's not what matters.
You should not try to assure anyone because all that matters that you want

I don't Think there is anything wrong with getting married young as long as you are in love and so is the person. I just turned 17 in may and I am getting married in August. :)

I know this is over a year old, so I'd just like to make a general comment. I really don't think 17 year olds should get married. There may be a small, very small, handful that are ready for the heavy responsibility that is marriage at 17, but they are not the majority. I think most people need time to be young and dumb and find out who they really are for the most part before they marry. Most 17 year olds haven't had that chance. But that's just my opinion.

If you are in love why does it matter? Age isn't nothing but a #!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Brandi Nikki

if you are in love why does it matter? age aint nothing but a #!

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Believe me, love is not all you need to have a good, healthy, functioning marriage. It also takes a lot of maturity and responsibility, something the vast majority of people in their teens don't have.

Hi,
The reason people are shocked at getting married as teenagers is simple; It is a fact that in America, 1 out of every 2 marriages end in divorce!!
In bi-racial marriages, the divorce rate is much higher.
The "old" days of young persons getting married as teenagers, and living the rest of their life with their spouse are gone. Why? Divorce is too easy now. If you don't make the marriage work, then it's easy to end it.
Think about what you are saying.
Wait until another couple of years. Will you feel the same way then? Still want to marry the same person?
Wait awhile.
Best of luck,
fredg

First of all you are to young both of you are you should finish school and the same with your mate after he is able to earn an income to support a family then think about getting married,don't get married until then other wise you will end up in a terrable relationship,with kids and then what will you do how will you support your kids

I do agree that 17 is too young to get married... take it from me I have been engaged twice before I hit 19 and didn't work either time.. never been married... you should give it some time and see what happens... as the two of you mature and graduate school things about you will change and you want to be sure that those changes are going to work out for the both of you... marriage is a big commitment and its forever... wait a while you are young and you have the rest of your lives to be together

0r maybe even consider a long engagement.. make sure its right before you do it hun... even if you're engaged your still committed..

Hi,
The reason people are shocked is simple; they know you are too young.
There is nothing you can do to prove it otherwise.
You will probably get married, and at 18, will probably be divorced before you are 23. If you are lucky, there will be no children at this stage in your life.
Best of luck, though.
fredg

So, I presume if you are young and reading this, you are contemplating marriage. I married my high school sweetheart at the age of 20, he was 21. We dated for 5 1/2 years and got married while I was in the middle of my junior year in college. We have been married for 13 years and I love him more than life. But wait until you say, told you so! Love is not enough! Following your heart is not the answer because your feelings will fail you! There will be days when you are not feeling in love. But then again, love is not just a feeling. You have to invest in your marriage and plan for the most difficult so you get the best. Don't make a decision based on romantic notions. Be wise. This is the rest of your life. There is a reason people say I got married too young. I have never met anyone who has ever regreted waiting. If it's meant to be, it will be meant to be a year, 2 years... from now.

I dated plenty of guys, lived a rough life, and have experienced plenty. I'm currently 18 but will be turning 19 in September. My boyfriend who is currently 21 proposed to me when I was 17. I was shocked and didn't give him a yes or no for months because I thought I'm too young, what would my family think, what is he thinking... Then I came to terms with all my thoughts. I love this guy, but we should have a long engagement first, and find that we really can work through thick and thin. We've been engaged for almost 2 years now and have been dating for almost 3 years... We're living together and granted we do have our rough times we make it through and we are getting married June 3, 2006. I do believe there is truth to getting married to young, but only you know what you really feel. I knew this was the guy I wanted to spend the rest of my life with because when I picture the future I can't picture it without him, he's my lover and my best friend. We can work through anything together... And yes, if it's true love why get married at a young age... because it gives you that extra step, that extra feeling, that extra happiness... If someone asks me aren't you too young I tell them in your eyes maybe but in my eyes I don't see an age I just see spending the rest of my life with my soul mate the only person I will ever love with my full heart... My advice: don't marry young unless there is no a single doubt in your mind, unless you not only can be a lover to your partner but also a best friend, unless you can work through anything together, don't worry what others say because they aren't you they would never understand because people always have some comment to make whether you are 16 or 76... they always have something to say it's human... It's important to have that feeling of "just knowing." Marriage is hard work, some days you'll think you just can't do it and others you'll think life couldn't get any better. It's not just love you need to consider it's everything involved in life.