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-   -   Is it OK if a freshman girl likes a junior guy? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=725928)

  • Jan 3, 2013, 04:57 PM
    16willdn
    Is it OK if a freshman girl likes a junior guy?
    I am a freshman and I like a junior. How do I know if the guy likes me back because he talks to this senior chick? But he also talks to me so how do I know if he likes me?
  • Jan 3, 2013, 08:07 PM
    Homegirl 50
    He may like you but only as a friend. Unless he spends a lot of time talking to you he probably does not like you the way you want.
  • Jan 7, 2013, 05:29 PM
    16willdn
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Homegirl 50 View Post
    He may like you but only as a friend. Unless he spends a lot of time talking to you he probably does not like you the way you want.

    Then what should I do because I like him should I just forget about him and put him in the back of my head or what well like we danced to the song called "Your Everything"by Kieth Urban at homecoming but after we danced I gave him a hug and said thank you for the dance and he smiled and said your welcome but after that he hasn't talked to me or smiled at me or anything so should I just forget about him and try to find someone new
  • Jan 7, 2013, 07:40 PM
    Homegirl 50
    Yes. He obviously does not like you the way you like him.
  • Jan 8, 2013, 07:57 AM
    16willdn
    Then should I just try to find someone new
  • Jan 8, 2013, 10:12 AM
    Homegirl 50
    You should just try and find friends. You're what 14? You don't need a boyfriend at this point. Make lots of friends, boy as well as girls.
  • Jan 8, 2013, 10:34 AM
    16willdn
    How can I make a lot of friends when I am not popular and yes I am 14 then why does everyone else seem to be happy with there boyfriend and everything and it seems like every one has boyfriend besides me is that wrong?? And I really only have 2 close friends
  • Jan 8, 2013, 11:02 AM
    Homegirl 50
    Not everyone is happy or has a boyfriend. It only seems that way to you. You are only 14. You have plenty of time for boyfriends.
  • Jan 8, 2013, 11:07 AM
    16willdn
    OK well do you think that I should go to the winter homecoming that is on January 19th by myself or should I ask a friend to go with me
  • Jan 8, 2013, 01:48 PM
    Homegirl 50
    Either is fine. The more you get out the better your chances of making friends
  • Jan 8, 2013, 03:23 PM
    16willdn
    Okay I guess I will go but isn't homecoming about dancing with a date and if I go by myself I won't have anyone to dance with will I
  • Jan 8, 2013, 03:57 PM
    16willdn
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Homegirl 50 View Post
    Either is fine. The more you get out the better your chances of making friends


    OK
  • Jan 8, 2013, 03:59 PM
    Homegirl 50
    There are girls that go to dances with other girls all the time. Even Homecoming. You can go with a guy or a girl.
    When my god-daughter went to Homecoming she went with three other girls.
  • Jan 8, 2013, 04:04 PM
    Alty
    There will be guys going solo too, and those are the guys you dance with.

    You're really young. My son is 14, and he's never had a girlfriend, he knows he's not ready for that, and frankly, he's having too much fun hanging out with his buddies, and getting to know people. Why settle for one person when there are literally hundreds of people to just be friends with?

    You may think that everyone has a boyfriend or a girlfriend, but they really don't. Even if they are "dating" at 14 it's just hanging out, it's not really dating, they just call it that.

    So go out, have fun, and stop worrying too much about having a boyfriend. Trust me, none of the "couples" that are together right now in your age group, will be together in a year. Wait and see.
  • Jan 8, 2013, 04:04 PM
    16willdn
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Homegirl 50 View Post
    There are girls that go to dances with other girls all the time. Even Homecoming. You can go with a guy or a girl.
    When my god-daughter went to Homecoming she went with three other girls.

    Okay but my best friend is going with a guy so I will feel out cased because everybody will be dancing won't they and I won't be and my other friends aren't going so wouldn't I be an out cast
  • Jan 8, 2013, 04:09 PM
    16willdn
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Alty View Post
    There will be guys going solo too, and those are the guys you dance with.

    You're really young. My son is 14, and he's never had a girlfriend, he knows he's not ready for that, and frankly, he's having too much fun hanging out with his buddies, and getting to know people. Why settle for one person when there are literally hundreds of people to just be friends with?

    You may think that everyone has a boyfriend or a girlfriend, but they really don't. Even if they are "dating" at 14 it's just hanging out, it's not really dating, they just call it that.

    So go out, have fun, and stop worrying too much about having a boyfriend. Trust me, none of the "couples" that are together right now in your age group, will be together in a year. Wait and see.

    Okay thanks but how do you no that there will be solo guys there and what do I do if I don't like them and one asks me to dance or something
  • Jan 8, 2013, 04:14 PM
    Alty
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by 16willdn View Post
    okay thanks but how do you no that there will be solo guys there and what do i do if i don't like them and one asks me to dance or something

    Of course there will be solo guys there. Do you really think they all found dates? If you don't want to dance with those that ask you, then graciously say "no thank you, but thanks for asking" and hope that someone that you do like, does ask you.

    Even if you don't dance, it will be fun if you stop being so paranoid about what everyone else is doing. Just go because you want to go, and who cares what everyone else is doing?
  • Jan 8, 2013, 05:29 PM
    Homegirl 50
    My goodness you say you are not popular but you're worrying about the possibility of someone you may not like asking you to dance. He's asking you to dance not date.
    If you don't want to dance, you graciously say no.
    There are plenty of people who will go and not have dates. Probably more guys than girls.
    You go and talk to people maybe dance and just have fun.
  • Jan 8, 2013, 05:33 PM
    dontknownuthin
    I don't think it's unusual for a Junior guy to date a Freshman girl at all. At some schools there's a stigma but from talking to my son and his friends, it's perfectly fine at their school.

    I would say that, regarding the dance, either go with a boy you have feelings for, or go with a group of friends and without a date. Going on a date-but-not-really with a guy you think of as just a friend is awkward. Unless the guy has a shot with you, go with a group of kids. If the junior boy likes you and you like him and he asks, go with him.
  • Jan 8, 2013, 06:08 PM
    16willdn
    Okay I will go and just have fun but okay there is this senior kid that goes to my youth group and he talks to me all of the time and like he sits by me and everything and he is a really nice guy so should I ask him to go to homecoming with me as friends or should I wait and see if he will ask me
  • Jan 8, 2013, 06:14 PM
    Alty
    Ask him. Tell him that it's just a friend thing. Who knows, it may end up being as more than friends down the road.

    Just ask, and have fun.
  • Jan 8, 2013, 06:18 PM
    16willdn
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Alty View Post
    Ask him. Tell him that it's just a friend thing. Who knows, it may end up being as more than friends down the road.

    Just ask, and have fun.

    Okay I will ask him and well since he drives a car should I ask him to pick me up or should I say my dad will drop me off
  • Jan 8, 2013, 06:30 PM
    Alty
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by 16willdn View Post
    okay i will ask him and well since he drives a car should i ask him to pick me up or should i say my dad will drop me off

    That's really up to your parents. Are you even allowed to date? You should talk to mom and dad before you ask him. If they agree, then ask if they are okay with him driving, or if they want to drop you off. It's all up to mom and dad, since you're not old enough to choose.
  • Jan 8, 2013, 06:30 PM
    Homegirl 50
    You can ask him. Make sure he knows it's just a date to the dance as friends. Check with your parents. Make sure it is OK with them.
  • Jan 8, 2013, 06:34 PM
    16willdn
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Alty View Post
    That's really up to your parents. Are you even allowed to date? You should talk to mom and dad before you ask him. If they agree, then ask if they are okay with him driving, or if they want to drop you off. It's all up to mom and dad, since you're not old enough to choose.

    But it isn't a date it is just going as friends and if I ask my parents they will say no because they don't let me do anything but they do know who this guy is and they know the parents so maybe they will say yes but I am scared to ask them and see what they say
  • Jan 8, 2013, 06:36 PM
    16willdn
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Homegirl 50 View Post
    You can ask him. Make sure he knows it's just a date to the dance as friends. Check with your parents. Make sure it is OK with them.

    Okay I will but the thing is my parents think that it is wrong for a girl to ask a guy they think that the guy should ask the girl
  • Jan 8, 2013, 07:02 PM
    Homegirl 50
    You either ask them and see what they say or just go by yourself. If they know the guy and you are just going as friends, they may have no problem.
  • Jan 8, 2013, 07:11 PM
    16willdn
    Okay I will ask them and if they say no should I still go to homecoming or just forget about it
  • Jan 8, 2013, 07:35 PM
    dontknownuthin
    Don't do anything behind your parent's back because it will backfire. They will assume the guy is a bad influence on you if you start sneaking around. So ask if they are OK with him picking you up, and if they aren't, ask if they will provide you a ride.

    As a parent of a high school senior, I can tell you that when my son starts acting sketchy about things, I turn the screws and tighten up the rules and boundaries. When he's acting honestly and following family rules, I give him a lot more freedom because I trust that he's being upfront with me.

    If you end up wanting to date this guy, it will be really hard to ever be allowed to if you start by irritating your parents in how you go about it.
  • Jan 8, 2013, 07:46 PM
    16willdn
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by dontknownuthin View Post
    Don't do anything behind your parent's back because it will backfire. They will assume the guy is a bad influence on you if you start sneaking around. So ask if they are ok with him picking you up, and if they aren't, ask if they will provide you a ride.

    As a parent of a high school senior, I can tell you that when my son starts acting sketchy about things, I turn the screws and tighten up the rules and boundaries. When he's acting honestly and following family rules, I give him a lot more freedom because I trust that he's being upfront with me.

    If you end up wanting to date this guy, it will be really hard to ever be allowed to if you start out by irritating your parents in how you go about it.

    Okay thanks I will definitely make sure to ask my parents
  • Jan 9, 2013, 10:24 AM
    16willdn
    If I go to homecoming the theme is superhero what kind of superhero women are there?
  • Jan 9, 2013, 10:35 AM
    Homegirl 50
    Wonder woman, Batgirl, Isis, Storm, Black widow.. Google it. You can find a lot.
  • Jan 9, 2013, 03:26 PM
    16willdn
    Okay where do I find a costume for one of these superhero women that isn't to expensive because I only have $34 to spend
  • Jan 9, 2013, 04:18 PM
    Homegirl 50
    Look at pictures of the costumes and put together something from what you have. Or buy a few pieces. Use your imagination.
  • Jan 9, 2013, 07:25 PM
    16willdn
    Okay I guess I can do that thank you
    Can I ask you another question okay why is high school so boring what can I do to make my high school years more enjoyable because I feel like I am just going through the motions and it isn't fun and people say high school is the best years of your life enjoy them but I don't know how to enjoy them when it is boring so how do I enjoy them
  • Jan 9, 2013, 08:53 PM
    Homegirl 50
    Join some clubs. You're in your first year. The freshman year is always kind of rough. It gets better.
  • Jan 10, 2013, 09:57 AM
    16willdn
    I hope so because right now it is pretty rough
  • Jan 10, 2013, 10:13 AM
    Homegirl 50
    Like I said get active, join some clubs. It does get better
  • Jan 10, 2013, 10:27 AM
    16willdn
    Okay
  • Jan 20, 2013, 12:12 PM
    16willdn
    Well last night was homecoming and it was really boring why am I now wishing I never had went

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