Ask Me Help Desk - Boyfriend pulled out a gun.

Boyfriend pulled out a gun.

I’m 16 and my boyfriend is 19. We have been dating for almost 7 months now. I know that we are truly in love. We stopped the arguing and are better than ever.

My mom told me whenever I want to go to his house I can ask. She only let me go once and then changed her mind and said no because she don’t want me pregnant. Last night my family caught me and him in my room having sex. My boyfriend and my brother got into it and my boyfriend pulled out a gun, but I know he wasn’t going to use it.

My family tells me to leave him alone because he's using me but they don’t even know him like that. My family doesn't like him at all. What do I do? I don’t want to give him up for nothing.

This idiot pulled a gun on your own flesh and blood and you want to stay with him?! What is wrong with you?

Depending on where you live, and what the legal age limit is for sexual contact, all your parents have to do is have him charged with statutory rape. Were you 15 when you two started dating? What state do you live in? They could also have him charged for pulling a gun on your brother.

The fact is, you're a minor, and your parents make the rules. If they don't want you seeing him, there's little you can do until you're an adult.

But I knew he wasn't going to use it.. he's not like that...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alty

Depending on where you live, and what the legal age limit is for sexual contact, all your parents have to do is have him charged with statutory rape. Were you 15 when you two started dating? What state do you live in? They could also have him charged for pulling a gun on your brother.

The fact is, you're a minor, and your parents make the rules. If they don't want you seeing him, there's little you can do until you're an adult.

I was 16 when we started dating I stay in South Carolina

Quote:

Originally Posted by laqueen1234

but i knew he wasnt going to use it.. hes not like that...

If he's not going to use it then why does he have a gun? Why did he pull it on your brother? How do you know he wasn't going to use it, can you read his mind?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alty

If he's not going to use it then why does he have a gun? Why did he pull it on your brother? How do you know he wasn't going to use it, can you read his mind?

He only carries it for protection because I stay in a bad neighborhood and he walks to see me . He was in distance when him and my brother was arguing. I knew for a fact he wouldn't do it I ran to him and told him to stop he's not like that he just was mad... I don't know

First thing.. read this post "https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/teens/all-teens-wondering-if-they-should-have-sex-teen-perspective-303617.html"

Don't ruin your life. I can't really say if you are right or your parents. There are many boys who do sex with girls and then after a few days (or weeks or months), they go away as if nothing happened. Who is at risk then? It's the girls.

I don't think you will listen to anybody who says to give up the relationship. So, I suggest that you at least stop adult activities until you are ready and capable of facing the consequences.

Tell me then... if he's not like that why did he have a gun? Lucky he didn't do that in my house, he would have been shot.

Now, yes, at your age your parents can, and should, keep you from dating this thug. Actually he should have been arrested for threatening your brother's life.

Moving out

Am I allowed to move out of my parents house at the age of 17 without a runaway charge? I live in Columbia, South Carolina

Wait until you are 18

No. You have to be 18 to move out and live with your thug.

Quote:

Originally Posted by J_9

No. You have to be 18 to move out and live with your thug.

So tell me.. what do you think I should do?

I think you should listen to you parents. You are too young to raise a child by yourself.

Yes, waiting is the only thing you can do now. Also, that guy doesn't look safe for you to move out. As I said earlier, if you neglect what these experts are saying, then you might regret your decision someday, and there is a heavy probability for that to happen.

Age of consent in SC is 16, but only if the older partners is 18 or under.

Its probably your boyfriend can be prosecuted as a sex offender.

Lets look at the facts here. Your parents wouldn't allow you to go to his house because they were afraid you would engage in sex. So, instead you defied your parents and had sex at your house. When caught, this thug, threatened your family with a gun.

I don't know your history, but this guy is not for you. He is clearly using you. You need to heed your parents and stay away from him.

Well, my uncle punched me in the face because I had my boyfriend in the house.. What do I do? That's why I want to move out..

You want to get your uncle in trouble because you defied your parents? Then report it to CPS. Then they may put you in a foster home and you will never see your parents or boyfriend.

No, my parents had done that many times(different reasons, though), but I never moved out.
They are your guardians and they have the responsibility to guide you through the right path.

Your uncle has a reason for doing that. They restricted you from going to your bf's house in the fear of your pregnancy, but you defied them, by having sex at home. Don't think this way.

Now just calm down. Put a period to your adult activities. Wait till you are capable of handling circumstances. Think over that guy then, if he is as safe as you think he is now. Take further steps only after that.

I understand

So you understand that he could go to jail and be labeled a sex offender for the rest of his life if you continue to have sex with him? Do you love him so much that you are willing to send him to jail?

Do you understand he could go to prison for pulling a gun on your brother?

Quote:

Originally Posted by J_9

So you understand that he could go to jail and be labeled a sex offender for the rest of his life if you continue to have sex with him? Do you love him so much that you are willing to send him to jail?

Do you understand he could go to prison for pulling a gun on your brother?

In the state of South Carolina I can be with him as long as I'm 16 or above. Ill be 17 next month, I understand everything everybody was telling me, but I just love him too much and really believe that he loves me . Like they always say, you can't put other people in your relationship because everybody makes mistakes and everybody can change. I know the real him and everybody is not liking him only because of what went down last night. So at the end of the day its my decision I will decide what I want to do. Its my fault that my parents don't like him because I allowed him to come in I believe that they shouldn't be mad at him... he works , go to school, makes money, and he even gives me money and take care of me when my family doesn't have the money. He's not a bad guy he uses the gun for protection when he comes to see me. He never been to jail or killed anyone he isn't in a gang or nothing. He works and provide for me and him.. that's why I neglect what my parents tell me about him..

Actually you don't understand. He could get in trouble because he is 19. If he were 18 he wouldn't.

I understand

You and your boyfriend are lucky your parents didn't have him arrested . I would have. You need to leave this thug alone.

Heck if the thug did THAT in my house he would have been shot!

I don't think you understand the severity of what happened last night. You defied your parents and had sex with this boy in your bed. They could have him charged for that because of his age and yours. Your brother was justifiably upset when catching his sister, a minor, having sex with an adult in her bed. Your boyfriend then pulled a gun on your brother. Your parents could have had him charged for that.

Right now, if you continue to defy your parents, they can send this man to prison, with a record and a sex offender title, one he'll have for the rest of his life.

So, tell me again how much you love him. Do you love him enough to leave him alone so he doesn't end up in jail?

Aside from all the other facts that people are pointing out to you, he is breaking the law by carrying a gun... never mind the fact that he supposedly pulled it on your brother.

How is he breaking the law Odinn?

Quote:

Originally Posted by J_9

How is he breaking the law Odinn?

Well, it's illegal to carry a handgun in SC unless you have a concealed carry permit... and I know he doesn't have one because he is not old enough to get one.

Yeah, I thought about that too. Have to be 21 to purchase a handgun.

But you can purchase a handgun through a private sale in SC as long as you are 18, just cannot get a carry permit until 21.

Yes, a real loser boyfriend, hope the parents put him in jail and keep this child away from him.

Also it is against the law to point the gun at another person.