Ask Me Help Desk - Is this bad?

Is this bad?

Ok well, on Friday night, I hooked up with this guy and now we're dating. :3 he's amazing but he's seventeen and I'm only 16. Is that illegal or something? I want to know because whenever I speak about him to my mum, she gives me this like 3 hour lecture on how I'm too young/ maybe if I were sixteen, etc. (It may not seem like many different things to rant for but she finds a way). Sooooo any advice would definitely be appreciated. Oh and from my last two questions about what I should do about my boyfriend, well we broke up and I haven't gone for that guy that I like either. So yeah, thank you :)

Oops I meant I'm only 15

Not a real big age difference, but it is up to your mom if you can date, if she will not give permission then it is illegal for him to date you

That sucks... But thanks, needed an answer.

You hooked up with him? Does that mean you had sex?

Hahahaha, no!! I am so not ready for that yet, and I'm underage anyway :) I just mean that we made out and were ummm dancing at bluelight, which is this kind of dance thing for under 17's.

So you met a guy Friday and you're dating him already. Did you know him before Friday?
I agree with your mom, you are too young to date.

I am a mother of a young girl myself and yes, your mother is right. You are too young to date.

-_- I've dated guys before you know, when I was 14, I dated a 16 year old. And yes, I knew him before then, he's a nice guy

Quote:

Originally Posted by BridgeOfLight97

I just mean that we made out .

What does "made out" mean? Any sexual activity, even touching outside of clothes can have serious consequences.

But the bottom line is your parents set the rules.

Parent* just one. And I just mean kissing, no touching. I'm not a slut you know.

Quote:

Originally Posted by BridgeOfLight97

Parent* just one. And i just mean kissing, no touching. I'm not a slut you know.

I didn't say you were. You actually sound like have a good head on your shoulders where sex is concerned, unlike a lot of children your age.

So I've been told.

Bottom line here is, your mother is your legal guardian. She feeds you, supports you and gives you a place to sleep. You would do well to listen to what she says.

Coming from a teen perspective if you only met him on Friday you don't really know much about him.Maybe chat to your mum and be adult about the conversation and maybe she'll understand better

The illegal age would be 18, under that is fine. It is your mothers decision on whether you will be able to date him while living under her roof.

Quote:

Originally Posted by asompur

The illegal age would be 18, under that is fine..

Thank you! That's all I actually wanted to know, whether it was legal or not.

Quote:

Originally Posted by asompur

The illegal age would be 18, under that is fine. It is your mothers decision on whether you will be able to date him while living under her roof.

How do you figure that under 18 is fine?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alty

How do you figure that under 18 is fine?

How do you not?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alty

How do you figure that under 18 is fine?

I think you've taken my comment the wrong way. I meant it as in it wouldn't be illegal. You are considered an adult once 18 years old. Under 18 the person is a minor.

Example: a person that's 15yrs. Dating someone that's 18yrs would NOT be fine
Example: a person 15yrs old dating a 16yr old WOULD be fine
Example: a person 20yrs old dating a 19yr old WOULD be fine

What do you think about a 15 year old dating a seventeen year old?

Quote:

Originally Posted by asompur

I think you've taken my comment the wrong way. I meant it as in it wouldnt be illegal. You are considered an adult once 18 years old. Under 18 the person is a minor.

Example: a person thats 15yrs. dating someone thats 18yrs would NOT be fine
Example: a person 15yrs old dating a 16yr old WOULD be fine
Example: a person 20yrs old dating a 19yr old WOULD be fine

But see, that's not 100% accurate.

It really depends on the age of consent laws where the poster lives. Most states have a legal age of consent between 16-18. If the poster lives in a state where the legal age is 16, her boyfriend is legal, but she's not. If there's any sexual contact he's in big trouble.

Fact is, there's no law against dating. Even if one person is 18 and the other is younger. Dating isn't illegal. A child, and the poster in this case is a child, dating without parental permission, that is illegal, and the boyfriend could be in a lot of trouble if they continue to date once mommy said no. But, if mommy said yes, even if he's 18 and she's 16, it wouldn't be illegal, unless they had sexual contact.

Quote:

Originally Posted by BridgeOfLight97

What do you think about a 15 year old dating a seventeen year old??

It doesn't matter what anyone on this site thinks, only your moms opinion matters. If she says no, it's no.

It's fine in my opinion.. As they say age is just a number. You've only got a year before this guy is an adult. Spend your time well with him while you still have a chance to. If wanting to continue your relationship until YOU are an adult you would have to do it in serecy. If he was caught he could go to jail. Think before you act.

Quote:

Originally Posted by asompur

It's fine in my opinion.. As they say age is just a number. You've only got a year before this guy is an adult. Spend your time well with him while you still have a chance to. If wanting to continue your relationship until YOU are an adult you would have to do it in serecy. If he was caught he could go to jail. Think before you act.

Now you're advising her to go behind her mothers back? Date him in secrecy?

Please keep in mind that this is not a question where your opinion matters. Your opinion has nothing to do with the law.

The posters mother doesn't want her to date, so she can't date, and advising her to date the guy anyway, that's no only condoning and encouraging illegal behavior, but it's also morally wrong.

As long as her mother says no, she can't date him until she's old enough to make that decision for herself.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alty

Now you're advising her to go behind her mothers back? Date him in secrecy?

Please keep in mind that this is not a question where your opinion matters. Your opinion has nothing to do with the law.

The posters mother doesn't want her to date, so she can't date, and advising her to date the guy anyway, that's no only condoning and encouraging illegal behavior, but it's also morally wrong.

As long as her mother says no, she can't date him until she's old enough to make that decision for herself.

I in no way advised her to date behind her mothers back. I don't have time for this, its late and I've got work tomorrow, goodight.

Quote:

Originally Posted by asompur

I in no way advised her to date behind her mothers back. I don't have time for this, its late and I've got work tomorrow, goodight.

If you're not advising her to date him behind her mothers back then why does she have to date him in secrecy?

Quote:

If wanting to continue your relationship until YOU are an adult you would have to do it in serecy

I said she would have to do it in secrecy if SHE chose to continue her relationship. Do you do anything but pester people?

If you're a pets expert Alty, then why are you commenting on a question to do with a teenager and her dating situation? Just wondering. Also I'm almost of legal age to date whoever I want, because the legal age where I live is 16. Sorry to say, but I asked for opinions, not more lectures from adults I Don't know, as well as my own mother.

Quote:

Originally Posted by asompur

I think you've taken my comment the wrong way. I meant it as in it wouldnt be illegal. You are considered an adult once 18 years old. Under 18 the person is a minor.

Example: a person thats 15yrs. dating someone thats 18yrs would NOT be fine
Example: a person 15yrs old dating a 16yr old WOULD be fine
Example: a person 20yrs old dating a 19yr old WOULD be fine

I think you are not being misunderstood, I think you are not expressing yourself clearly. Plus you are wrong.

There are no laws governing dating. Any laws that involve two people of differing ages deals with sexual activity. However, there are laws against parental interference. So as long as a person is under 18 they are subject to their parents control. ANYONE who defies parental edict, can get in legal trouble.

Quote:

Originally Posted by asompur

As they say age is just a number.

Who is "they"? In my experience the only people who say age is just a number are those trying to justify a relationship that is wrong. The fact is that age DOES matter. It matters less and less as one gets older, but it does matter. I don't see a major problem with 15/17, but 14/16 is iffy and 13/15 is a nono. And 23/25 is just not an issue.

Quote:

Originally Posted by BridgeOfLight97

If your a pets expert Alty, then why are you commenting on a question to do with a teenager and her dating situation?? Just wondering. Also I'm almost of legal age to date whoever I want, because the legal age where I live is 16. Sorry to say, but I asked for opinions, not more lectures from adults I DONT know, as well as my own mother.

Aren't you paying attention? THERE IS NO LEGAL AGE FOR DATING. THERE ARE NO LAWS THAT TALK ABOUT DATING.

But there ARE LAWS that make you subject to your parents control until you are EIGHTEEN! Therefore if anyone defies your parents edict preventing you from dating they can be in trouble with the law. Please read your responses.

Many of us may be experts in one area, but that doesn't preclude us from being knowledgeable in other areas as well.

You got opinions and you got some facts (not all correct facts though). My opinion I don't see a general problem with a 15 yr old dating a 17 yr old. But I don't know the players. So the ONLY opinion that really matters is your parents. If they say no, then its no.

Stop saying parents. It's parent. As in just one. And your telling me to get my facts right... Geez, way to contradict yourself.

You've got a lot to learn about life sweetheart. You're so oblivious to good advice because your narrow mind is set on your own priorities. Respect is another thing you need to adopt, the people on this site volunteer their time to help people, not get insulted by children.

I can't wait until you have a 15 year old daughter of your own. We'll see just how many 17 year olds you let near her.

Either you take the advice given to you with class, or get off this site and continue to be the litte ignorant kid you've shown us to be.

Quote:

Originally Posted by BridgeOfLight97

Stop saying parents. It's parent. As in just one. And your telling me to get my facts right... Geez, way to contradict yourself.

Excuse me, but I was taking in generalities. My responses were meant for ANYONE reading not just you. That's why I used parents, plural.

Interesting on you focusing on that one point and ignore all the others.

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Originally Posted by ScottGem

Excuse me, but I was taking in generalities. My responses were meant for ANYONE reading not just you. That's why I used parents, plural.

Interesting on you focusing on that one point and ignore all the others.

That is cause by the fact that she only wants to listen to what she wants to hear. Typical behavior of an ignorant kid. This whole thread is useless she is clearly not taking in anything being said.

I thought adults were meant to be responsible and you know, MATURE. So far, all your doing is acting like a child and pointing out everything that I stuff up, so yeah thanks for the help :(

Quote:

Originally Posted by BridgeOfLight97

I thought adults were meant to be responsible and you know, MATURE. so far, all your doing is acting like a child and pointing out everything that I stuff up, so yeah thanks for the help :(

Don't try and turn the tables on this young lady. You've done nothing but scold and insult everyone that has posted something intelligent.

You deserve nothing but the same in return.

Can you please just stop. I got the advice I needed and every time someone adds something else, its to have a go at me. I'm being polite and using manners, kay? Please stop.

Quote:

Originally Posted by BridgeOfLight97

I thought adults were meant to be responsible and you know, MATURE. so far, all your doing is acting like a child and pointing out everything that I stuff up, so yeah thanks for the help :(

OK, I'm going to give this one more chance. We have tried to help you. We've actually sided with you that a 15 yr old dating a 17 yr old is not a big deal as long as there is no sexual activity going on. Unfortunately, for you, our opinion doesn't matter, its your mother's opinion that does.

What do you do, you insult us for trying to help. The only one acting childish here is you. I can understand why your mother doesn't think you are old enough.

If you continue in this vein the thread will be closed.

I'm sorry. I actually am sorry, I shouldn't have carried on, I was acting like a child, I'll admit. I should learn to keep some things to myself so I don't insult people. Sorry.