Ask Me Help Desk - How to I be happy? Seriously

How to I be happy? Seriously

Well,latley I've just been real down. There's many of reasons. Thinking about it makes me even more sad and I know what your going to say "Well dont think about it". You can't just not think about it. Anyway,I've read many of ways to get happy,but it takes time and that's what I don't have. I just want to know at least a way to get happy in little time. Im probably going to just keep blabbering on,but it just feels nice to let it out a little. Well last night I wrote a whole 2 pages of stuff that makes me,me.. (unique things about people interest me). I know weird but oh well. It made me pretty pumped up and hyper and stuff. But now that's gone again. I think there's something wrong with me but I don't know I'm not a doctor or anything. Im talking about mentally,like I'm not bipolar or anything. But the littlest things get me down,and no one else I know is like that. And when they get me down,buddy they get me down. And sometimes I just feel so alone,and recently the one person I could talk to about everything and just make everything seem so perfect,won't talk to me and I think he's iggnoring me. Idk what I did but man I wish I didn't. Its killing me. He made everything better and made all the weight lift off my shoulders. Just made everything seem right,you know? Anyway,I'm not even sure what I'm asking.. just needed to know if anyone else feels like this and what they do to help. No I'm not depressed. And no I don't think about suicide or anything like that... im just,really sad. I wish I knew what made all this happen and how I can fix it. I honestly don't see how some people are happy all the time and their life is perfect and nothing goes wrong? This an't a fairytale people. But if you are one of those people,how do you do it? Does anything go wrong in your life? If so,how do you handle it? I love hearing peoples opionons,so let me hear them,please. See? What did I tell you,I was going on blabbering about nothing real important. Bla,I don't know what to do.. mabye I should just get out more or something. Ive been cooped up in the house for about a few week and haven't done much. But I don't know. Im not even sure what the question I'm asking is. Oh well,if you have any opinions or anything let me know.

First of all, no one's life is perfect. If you could follow someone 24/7 for a week, you would find out that person is very much like you (and me), with ups and downs in moods.

Stop obsessing over how you feel or don't feel. Stop obsessing over how perfect everyone else's life is. How do you stop obsessing? Move out of your comfort zone and do something creative or positive. You didn't say how old you are, so I'm not sure about your ability to get around on your own. If you can manage it with some kind of transportation, get a volunteer job at an animal shelter or a library or a nursing home. Start giving back to your community.

You said you like to write? Then set a time every day, say, in the evening before bed, when you write for fifteen minutes. Write about the positive things that happened that day or write about an interesting person you met or write about what you ate or the weather. The main thing is to write. Use a wire-bound notebook and a page per day and date each page.

Do these things for a month and then let us know how it's going.

That's pretty good idea.thanks :)
I'm 15 so I can't really get out on my own yet.
I heard this saying once "If everyone threw all there problems in one pile and had to pick,then you would end-up grabbing your back." that really did make me think,I mean I have a good family and roof over my head and all that.. but I don't know,I'm just missing something I'm my life. Honestly I just got out of a really bad controlling relationship 2 months ago. Mabye that has something to do with this? Again I don't know I'm not a doctor or anything. Im just missing something I'm my life and man I just can't figure out what it is. I really wish I knew.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

First of all, no one's life is perfect. If you could follow someone 24/7 for a week, you would find out that person is very much like you (and me), with ups and downs in moods.

Don't forget how annoyed they'd be for you following them around for a week! XD

Unfortunately, like you said, it takes time. There is no real way around that. (Yes, you can have a temp fix (like writing), but as you have already learned, it's not lasting.)
However, keep working toward it, and the results are more than rewarding enough!

BTW: This "guy" you could go to with everything, was he a boyfriend maybe?

no.hes like my best friends since we were 2 or 3 lol
He helps me with everything and I help him with everything.
I really do care about him a lot and I don't know why he's iggnoring me lately. Its really brakeing my heart and I wish I knew what I did and what to do about it.
Thanks for answering though :)

Oh I have lots of opinons. I'm 16 and I know what you mean. Last year I had a best friend and just left me hanging because he had a girlfriend that didn't like me. I'm sure you get upset about just about anything just like normal teenage girls. Im sure your upset about a certain boy, or girl. I'm sure there are rumors and I'm sure your parents might be part of the problem. All I can say is don't try to make the situation worse by getting into it. Just leave it alone and if its with a dumb that says "oh im gonna beat your " she won't. But just in case don't intaganise her. Oh and yes start going out more even if its just for a walk around the block. You get to think about things "good and bad" and you get exercise.
:)
Goodluck.

Quote:

Originally Posted by HelpinHere

Don't forget how annoyed they'd be for you following them around for a week! xD

Didn't you know? You're the first on the list. We start following you around at 9 a.m. Monday morning.

Quote:

Originally Posted by rosebud135

Oh i have lots of opinons. im 16 and i know wat you mean. last year i had a bestfriend and just left me hanging because he had a gf that didnt like me. im sure you get upset about just about anything just like normal teenage girls. Im sure your upset about a certain boy, or girl. im sure there are rumors and im sure your parents might be part of the problem. all i can say is dont try to make the situation worse by getting into it. just leave it alone and if its with a dumb that says "oh im gonna beat your " she wont. but just in case dont intaganise her. oh and yes start going out more even if its just for a walk around the block. you get to think about things "good and bad" and you get excercise.
:)
goodluck.

Thanks :D
Well this past school year has probably been the worst yet.. I was in a contolling/abusive relationship the whole year. I lost %90 of my friends because of that (ive got them back now thank goodness). I got in a fight with one of my best friends and got in a fight with her and it got the principal and all of our parents involed in it. Now that that is all behind me,I'm trying to like start over and try to make peace with everyone and be a good person you know? But this is just getting in the way and hurting it all. And my guy friend (that I was talking about) he has helped me through it so so much and I just can't thank him enough,he means a lot to me. I just don't know what to do now.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Didn't you know? You're the first on the list. We start following you around at 9 a.m. Monday morning.

Well, if YOU have really been following me, you'll know that today I took my car to the shop and fitted it with a "James Bond patented Oil Slick" to get rid of this pesky tail I have had lately... xD

Have you asked him why he is ignoring you?
Even if he is, you can still at least get him to talk to you for a minute, I'm sure.

Whatever his reason, if you know it, it's still better than wondering. I suggest finding out, and maybe trying to get him to talk to you more.

Well I tried txting him but he won't ever reply.
And he won't talk to me on myspace either.
Its eating me up inside.
I think he's just busy with other girls or something (hes trying to find a gf) and he's too busy for me :P

Hi, taylor2012!

Anything that a person does to communicate on the Internet or via phone with typed in words is communication but potentially not the sincerest and/or genuine form of communication.

What do you think that I mean by that, please?

Thanks!

Hmm... well, if he's been your best friend for over 12 years? I'm sure you know where he lives. Drop by where he'll be next time it's on the way, and just ask him what's up.
If he appriciates your friendship as much as you do, he'll at least give you the courtesy of talking to you.

Hum Clough,you confused me lol

Lol and funny you say that HelpinHere cause he moved a few weeks ago and now I have no idea where he is lol
And yeah,I haven't realized its been that long since I've known him lol

Quote:

Originally Posted by taylor2012

thanks :D
well this past school year has probly been the worst yet..i was in a contolling/abusive relationship the whole year. I lost %90 of my friends because of that (ive got them back now thank goodness). I got in a fight with one of my best friends and got in a fight with her and it got the principal and all of our parents involed in it. Now that that is all behind me,im trying to like start over and try to make peace with everyone and be a good person you know? But this is just getting in the way and hurting it all. And my guy friend (that i was talking about) he has helped me through it so so much and i just can't thank him enough,he means alot to me. I just dont know what to do now.

Oh yea you and me are on the same page. I think I'm in a realationship right now that certainly isn't the greatest but I can't seem to leave him. He doesn't hit me but I can't see my friends or do anything that I use to. Just talk to your friends as much as you can and although people need time to themselves try to have more friend time because you'll get your mind off A lot! Trust me it works. :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by taylor2012

Hum Clough,you confused me lol

lol and funny you say that HelpinHere cause he moved a few weeks ago and now i have no idea where he is lol
and yeah,i havent realized its been that long since ive known him lol

I do feel badly that you're confused by what I asked, taylor2012. But, I would still appreciate it if you would try to answer the question that I asked.

Thanks!

You really need to get rid of him,that's what this guy did and it just ruined me.
I wish I could talk to my friends this summer but my 2 best friends (other then my guy friend) are sooo busy all the time and I never get to talk to them or have them come over or anything. I love talking to my friends though. They're awesome. :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clough

I do feel badly that you're confused by what I asked, taylor2012. But, I would still appreciate it if you would try to answer the question that I asked.

Thanks!

Um I don't understand the question. Im sorry.
Could you re-word it?
Thank You :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by taylor2012

Um i dont understand the question. Im sorry.
Could you re-word it?
Thank You :)

Okay, let me put things a different way then as far as asking a question concerning the topic and context of what I was inquiring of you.

If you're going to communicate with someone to let them know exactly how you think and feel, which of the following ways do you think would be the best way to communicate those things?

A. By texting via a cell phone.
B. Via an online site.
C. On the phone so that the two of you can actually hear each others' voice.
D. In-person, one-on-one, face-to-face meeting.

It's okay to choose more than one. I'm just looking for your opinion and thoughts here.

Thanks!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clough

Hi, taylor2012!

Anything that a person does to communicate on the Internet or via phone with typed in words is communication but potentially not the sincerest and/or genuine form of communication.

What do you think that I mean by that, please?

Thanks!

Rewording it:

You can communicate through the internet, cell phone, etc. but unless you are talking to someone in person it is not genuine, as you cannot see their face, hear their emphasis, etc. that makes speech the great thing it is.

What do you think he means by that?

EDIT: Nvm, he beat me to it! XD

I'm really sorry that he moved. I'm sure that when you keep trying, you'll be able to do something about it.

Ah I see now lol
D. because body language is a big part in communticating.
Dang your really smart.
See? You couldn't see me smiling over this lol

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clough https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/amhd_i...s/viewpost.gif
Hi, taylor2012!

Anything that a person does to communicate on the Internet or via phone with typed in words is communication but potentially not the sincerest and/or genuine form of communication.

What do you think that I mean by that, please?

Thanks!

Quote:

Originally Posted by HelpinHere

Rewording it:

You can communicate through the internet, cell phone, etc. but unless you are talking to someone in person it is not genuine, as you cannot see their face, hear their emphasis, etc. that makes speech the great thing it is.

What do you think he means by that?

EDIT: Nvm, he beat me to it! XD

I'm really sorry that he moved. I'm sure that when you keep trying, you'll be able to do something about it.

LOL! I think that you and I are definitely on the same "wave length" here, HelpinHere!

I'll greatly enjoy seeing what else we have in common so that we can further collaborate on things on this site! A number of us have definitely formed an allegiance of sorts on this site where we call upon each other in times of need for someone else or each other.

Thanks!

Thank you for helping me everyone :D
Ive stayed up all night looking for help for a lot of things.
I love this site!
It really does help!

Yes, it's a really great site, really well moderated and much easier to use than most of the other question and answer type of sites.

I've been hooked on it ever since I started here a couple of years ago.

Thanks!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clough

LOL! I think that you and I are definitely on the same "wave length" here, HelpinHere!

I'll greatly enjoy seeing what else we have in common so that we can further collaborate on things on this site! A number of us have definitely formed an allegiance of sorts on this site where we call upon each other in times of need for someone else or each other.

Thanks!

Hmm... maybe! I just believe the same way though (as far as the communication goes) so I got what you meant right away!
If you want to ask me anything/call on me/etc. just send me a personal message, xD

If I see a thread I can help in, I will!

Glad you can find this site, and the people on it, helpful!
I fell in love with it the day I found it. Get help, and give help. (Which, if you can do it effectively, I believe is very theraputic.) Don't be worried to ask anything you need help in, or give help if you can!

Quote:

Originally Posted by taylor2012

You really need to get rid of him,thats what this guy did and it just ruined me.
I wish i could talk to my friends this summer but my 2 best friends (other then my guy friend) are sooo busy all the time and i never get to talk to them or have them come over or anything. I love talking to my friends though. They're awesome. :)

Yea but its so hard. We've been together 10 months and before that he was my best friend. Oh well if there your bffs tell them that they need time for you!! (:

Quote:

Originally Posted by HelpinHere

Hmm... maybe! I just believe the same way though (as far as the communication goes) so I got what you meant right away!
If you wanna ask me anything/call on me/etc. just send me a personal message, xD

If I see a thread I can help in, I will!

When someone's in a real bind on this site, there are certain ones that I call upon to go to the thread to help out. There's no reason for someone to be alone here. Some of those people that I call upon have left the site, for one reason or another. It's really good to get some "fresh blood" in here!

Thanks!

Lol... well, I've "been here" a little while, but I was gone for about a month or two... =[

It wasn't until I came back that I realized really that answering questions more than asking them was helping me... and my post count has almost doubled in two days! (from ~150 to what it is now)

@rosebud: I know, it can be hard. I've been through something similar before. But, know that you're completely right saying a true friend WILL find time for you. If he cannot do that, then he shouldn't get as much care as you still give him.

Hey, taylor2012!

Are you still there?

Thanks!

Okay, taylor2012!

I can see that you're no longer logged on to this site. Sometime, in the near future, when we're both on here at the same time, I do have some activities that I like to do with folks here that can help them to not feel so down and feel better about themselves. If you'd like to know what those activities are and maybe participate in doing them, please let me know on this thread.

Thanks!

Hey!
Im sorry I feel asleep lol
Anyway,thank you for helping me everyone :)
I like activities! Lol

Hey clough!! I would be cool to here about these activities! And taylor2012 I wish you the best of luck with your friends. If he isn't talking to you why beat yourself up over him? Maybe confide in some of your other really good friends and tell them how you are feeling. Good friends will always understand! Sorry to hear that he moved, is he still in the same town as you just on a different street or did he move to another town/state? Maybe he hasn't had time to talk because he is busy unpacking boxes and things and getting settled in his new home. Don't worry, I'm sure you have plenty of other friends to talk to. He's probably just going through a rough patch in his life right now, so don't worry. Good luck! :)

He just moved houses in the same town.
Its just hard because I have only 3 really good friends and he's one of them,and my other 2 are busy all the time and I just feel alone :(

Quote:

Originally Posted by THEpurplepeanut

hey clough!!!! i would be cool to here about these activities!...... :)

Yes, the activity things are something that we can definitely discuss as far as what to do here! There are a number of things that we can do...

It's nice to hear from you again, THEpurplepeanut!

Thanks!

Yes, I also would like to hear of these!
Since I deal with people like this in real life, too, would it be possible to adapt these for in-person conversations also?

If you don't want to reveal them until taylor is online, could you perhaps PM me them?

I work with things in music and other arts like the visual arts and arts that concern writing.. I would be happy to brainstorm on this thread as to the possibility of activities that we might do on this site in order to help each other as well as others who come along...

The writing songs thing has turned out to be a success. Although, it has been hard for me to keep up with it in recent months because of my health and other things that I've had to do...

Thanks!

Quote:

Originally Posted by taylor2012

He just moved houses in the same town.
Its just hard because i have only 3 realy good friends and hes one of them,and my other 2 are busy all the time and i just feel alone :(

I'm sorry that you feel alone, I too am having problems with friends (my best friend and I got into a fight a few days before school ended, and I haven't talked to her for over a month), maybe you could spend a little more time with your family, that's what I'm doing and it is helping me get over the trouble I'm going through, like talking to my mom more and not hiding in my room. Maybe hang out at the library and check out a few books to read to keep your mind off the loneliness you are feeling. This summer so far for me has been a relaxing time away from my friends and with my family and maybe that's what you may need too. Do you have any brothers or sisters? You could hang out with them and get to know them better. Maybe some family time is the best medicine in this type of situation. :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clough

Yes, the activity things are something that we can definitely discuss as far as what to do here! There are a number of things that we can do...

It's nice to hear from you again, THEpurplepeanut!

Thanks!

It's been a while:) how are you doing?