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Originally Posted by Clough

What is it about your relationship with this boy that makes you feel good, Beth?

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I would appreciate and answer to my question, Beth. Thank you.

Yeah... you shouldn't snoop like that. That's kind of messed up. My ex broke up with me, and then she started getting mad at me about something that was on my email acct. which was weird... because it was a huge misunderstanding. But it pushed me away from her further and it made me change my password...

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Originally Posted by beth911

What about how he treats me? He thinkd I don't do anything for him but I did alot.

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Stop making it all about you and how you suffer and how noble you are. That kind of person is called a martyr.

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Stop making it all about you and how you suffer and how noble you are. That kind of person is called a martyr.

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Thought martyrs were people who died for a cause, on top of those things... but mainly for a cause. In this case, she's not exactly doing this for a cause... cant' call her a martyr. Just... a really sad lady... who doesn't know what to do at this point.

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Originally Posted by ISneezeFunny

thought martyrs were people who died for a cause, on top of those things...but mainly for a cause. in this case, she's not exactly doing this for a cause...cant' call her a martyr. just...a really sad lady....who doesn't know what to do at this point.

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Yeah, she's dying for a cause--her cause. In psychology, a person who has a martyr complex desires the feeling of being a martyr for its own sake, seeking out suffering or persecution because it feeds a psychological need. "Oh, Sneezy, after all I've done for you. I've been such a good mother and you treat me like THIS?" That's a martyr.

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Originally Posted by Clough

I would appreciate and answer to my question, Beth. Thank you.

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No one has ever cared about me before. Iv'e never even had friends that cared,

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Originally Posted by Clough
What is it about your relationship with this boy that makes you feel good, Beth?

Originally Posted by Clough
I would appreciate and answer to my question, Beth. Thank you.

Originally Posted by beth911
No one has ever cared about me before. Iv'e never even had friends that cared.

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Thank you for the answer to my question. So, how is he caring for you now?

He did before and now yeah... I'm 2 tired 2 think

Clough asked, "HOW did he care?" Any examples?

Later, I'll answer that.. Right now, he e-mailed me saying that he was looking for the perfect girl and he knows he'll never find her but he's still going to wait... I told him "yeah you never will find her because you just let her go"
But how could he have loved me and now not care anymore when I didn't do anything?

Then I just told him that's he's not perfect either and she wouldn't deserve someone who isn't.
He used to say if I just lost a few pounds I would be perfect and that he would never leave unless I cheated on him. I didn't cheat on him.

He was a lot like how I am to him and then he changed slowly.
He e-mailed me back and said "I am so perfect. How am I not?''


By the way, MERRY CHRISTMAS!! (He didn't say that part. I'm telling that to you)

He said that he showed that girl he's always talking to his "u no what" . Do you think he's just trying to upset me? I told him that I didn't care and there's no reason why he should be telling me that.

In one sentence you are saying how much you love each other and then in the next sentence you are saying he acts like he doesn't know me. If he really wants to be with you he wouldn't be so evasive and making excuses. Often when teens don't want to be with their gf/bf they don't want to have a scene or 'break up' so they just avoid because it seems to them to be the easy out.
Also at your age what many teens want one day is totally different another.

I'm confused by what he's saying... its like he's kind of talking to me but then every now in then he brings up that he doesn't want to talk to me and we aren't together anymore. He keeps talking about how he wants to go to strip clubs and stuff... do you think its just to make me mad?

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Beth, J doesn't want a needy gf. That's what you are. Stop. Right now. Stop.

Now, think about it. What can you do to act NOT needy around him?

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I already said that she was extremely needy. It's like she can't stand on her two front feet. :rolleyes:
Look teenage boys are really thinking of one thing and it's NOT "love."

Your b/f is just like you, young and confused.

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Originally Posted by beth911

im confused by what hes saying.... its like hes kinda talkin to me but then every now in then he brings up that he doesnt wanna talk to me and we arent together anymore. he keeps talkin about how he wants to go to strip clubs and stuff..... do u think its just to make me mad?

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You are confused because you want to make things to fit the results you want and
Not accepting the explanations of his behavior that we have all given you.

He may want to simply be on decent talking terms with you but realizing that you are in denial that it is over he is saying stuff like wanting to go to strip clubs and so forth to make you accept he isn't the guy you think he is and think you love. Whether he actually wants to go to them or not is beside the point.

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Originally Posted by N0help4u

You are confused because you want to make things to fit the results you want and
not accepting the explanations of his behavior that we have all given you.

He may want to simply be on decent talking terms with you but realizing that you are in denial that it is over he is saying stuff like wanting to go to strip clubs and so forth to make you accept he isn't the guy you think he is and think you love. Whether he actually wants to go to them or not is beside the point.

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Beth, get over him, because to me he sounds like a JERK. He keeps you hanging, enjoying all your attention while he secretly laughs at you. Look almost all woman went through what your going through. Trust me, this feeling you have will pass. Your are just obsessing over one fish in the sea. Not everyone is meant to be together. I was friends with my partner before we started going out. You think your "in love" but really your just hurting that this guy blew you off. I don't blame you, because he sounds like a JERK. Be friends with the next guy before lovers!

See eveyone tells me they've been through this and that I'll get over it... every time I think I'm going to be fine with out him I make sure I won't be. And theirs not a thing anyone can do to change that. That's why I say even if I feel like giving up on being with him I won't give up and I stick with it. I've felt like I would b OK but then I still make sure I don't give up.


We e-mailed each other back and forth for like 3 hrs last night. At least he was willing to talk to me but all he really did was try to make me mad. He kept talking about how he signed up for the airforce and how he's 18 now and he can go to strup clubs and all that other stuff. I'm hopeing he wasn't being serious.

Wondrgirl, if you read this.. Do you think that he was making that up to make me mad? He said that they were going to go somewhere but his dad was tired so they just went to the pancake house instead. He said none of his friends are old enough to go with him. Do you think he's just making up stories again? Or Do you think he's being serious?