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Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

So why are we having this conversation?
She told you she does not want to be with you. She told you that twice. What are you not getting?
So then wait a month if she comes back and you still want her, good for you, if she doesn't, then there ya go. But in the meantime leave her alone.

I'm sorry, I don't understand what the problem is with you guys. Are you just not used to being told No! Do you just not know how to except the fact that someone may not want to be with you?
I don't want to see means I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU.

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Can you please explain what you're talking about? I know she doesn't want back with me.. what I want to know is why she's phoning me and if I dealt with it right...

I think homegirl didn't finish reading

Well If I misunderstood I'm sorry. I'm not getting what your asking. If you have decided to leave her alone, then you've done the right thing. You had a moment of weakness and chatted with her. Just don't do it again.
Again, I apologize

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Originally Posted by DazzaB

Can you please expalin what you're talking about? I know she doesn't want back with me.. what I want to know is why she's phoning me and if I dealt with it right...

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She called to take your temperature, and see where your head was at after a vacation. It was a big mistake to even answer the phone, because she knows you will be happy in the friend zone, and may call to chat you up more. Of course you'll eat it up, because you think she will change her mind and see what she has missed and things can be as they were before. WRONG! She will confuse your poor head, until moving on and getting healthy, will be even harder. That's what you need more than this one sided relationship, is to get your head on straight and deal with reality. She kicked you to the curb, but still wants you at the end of a leash(phone) Get real and check the caller ID, before you answer and stop talking like she is your friend, and you won't be wondering why this, why that. It not healthy to be consumed with what she does or thinks, before you know yourself enough too love yourself FIRST!! No contact, but in your case NO CHATTING either.

First of all answering that call WRONG!!

Your not listening to any advice you are receiving on here...

No contact means if she calls you don't answer. It's that simple either get srious with no contact or stay in the friend zone.

The reason she called you was cause she was feeling a bit lonely and thought old faithful would still be on the leash so she went to the cupboard pulled out some doggy treats and tossed them down the phone line and there was her little pupppy dog chomping at the biyt...

Imagine what she would have been thinking when you didn't answer. Or better yet don't be rude answer the phone but say EXACTLY THIS. Hi is everything OK she replies " I was just wondering how yourve been. You repoly " You said you didn't want to ever speak to me again so why are you calling? She replies "well i just wanted to know what yourve been up to and how yourve been . You reply " well Ive been fine but you said you o longer want to know me so that's that I have to go BYE!! Hang up get some control back don't be afraid she will call again if she is keen. Push her away she will get keener and if she is not that keen she won't and you will then have your answer to why she is calling!! She is calling to make sure your still waiting on her. Get some balls and show her you are no longe waitning on her!! Get some courage take a chance put her in her place let her know what she told you is what your sticking to!!

Really mate she said she doesn't want you so why would you even consider talking to someone like that!!

Quick run down my ex said same crap a s yours. I did the same crap as you. Then I realised she said she doesn't want to talk to me anymore. So what does that mean when she rings it means reafirm what she told you. She said she doesn't want to speak to you well give her that she has to live by what she says or elae she will walk on you like she is. Get some balls if you want this girl back give yourself a chaance and stop answering and act like you don't need her and you may just get a surprise... Either way she will get a surprise when she realises her dog ahas run away!! Everyone gets upset when they realise the dog is pff the leash and then they go looking for uoit. Diont go running back find a new owner and the old one will want you back! Girls LOVE what they can't have! ALWAYS

Feeling very disappointed now... a lot has happened in the past month.. we got talking again and we've met up a few times. Had a great night on Saturday night there when it felt like we had just started going out with each other, couldn't keep our hands off each other, etc. She sent a text to me saying "it really sucks not having you as my boyfriend"..

I was going to take it slow and then ask her to be my girlfriend again soon but this week has changed my mind.. she told me that she was free on Saturday so I asked her to meet up and she said yes. Now she told me that we're not meeting up on Saturday because her friend and her has plans, and apparently, friends come first.

She is also going to a wedding tomorrow with a male "friend"..

I think I'm regretting getting this close with her again..

I'm feeling so down tonight because I know she is going to be with this boy at a wedding allll day tomorrow. I think this is the first boy she's been with since we broke up and I keep getting memories of all the times she told me that she'd always be mine.

:(:( - has anyone else ever experienced this?

You need to leave her alone. She will string you along as long as you keep going for it.
Don't answer when she call and don't call her.

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Originally Posted by DazzaB

I'm feeling soo down tonight because I know she is going to be with this boy at a wedding allll day tomorrow. I think this is the first boy she's been with since we broke up and I keep getting memories of all the times she told me that she'd always be mine.

:(:( - has anyone else ever experienced this?

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Yes we have, most of us here have been through pretty much the same thing and some of us had to learn the hard way that the relationship was over, and we had to move on. Join the club. Now accept the facts, and get a healthy life through NO CONTACT, and move on, as she has.

Definitely move on no contact she will string you along

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Originally Posted by DazzaB

I'm feeling soo down tonight because I know she is going to be with this boy at a wedding allll day tomorrow. I think this is the first boy she's been with since we broke up and I keep getting memories of all the times she told me that she'd always be mine.

:(:( - has anyone else ever experienced this?

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Hell yeah everybody's experience this. Some of more then once. As I went back and reread the thread to refresh my memory all I could think of was "if he had just taken this advice the first time." Everything was there but you were blinded by it all and you didn't want to accept the fact you were being strung along. Well accept it now. Learn from it now. When it's over and when she calls for a break you get out of there and grant her, her wish and prove her wrong by not being available to her.

I got to the point and asked her did she ever see us in an exclusive relationship again after she was acting "off" with me once again. She told me she didn't want to for years to come, so I told her we're better off going separate ways as we wanted different things.

No contact comes into tact again.

Hadn't heard from her since I broke it off with her except for Thursday night when she rung me. I shouldn't have answered it but I did and I've learnt that I shouldn't answer anymore because it just makes me think about her even more.

She has put up things on her Bebo profile about how much she loves boys and all this other crap, probably to make me jealous and to hurt me. I try not to look at her profile but the temptation is too much.

Apart from looking at her profile, I've been keeping well. I occupy my whole day by packing in as many things as possible, but today I'm not doing anything and it's making me think and hurt about her.

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Apart from looking at her profile, I've been keeping well.

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Stop looking at at her profile, and torturing yourself.

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Originally Posted by DazzaB

Hadn't heard from her since I broke it off with her except for Thursday night when she rung me. I shouldn't have answered it but I did and I've learnt that I shouldn't answer anymore because it just makes me think about her even more.

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I think you learned this lesson before that, now you must put it into practice.

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Originally Posted by DazzaB

She has put up things on her Bebo profile about how much she loves boys and all this other crap, probably to make me jealous and to hurt me. I try not to look at her profile but the temptation is too much.

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She does probably do it to torture you. That doesn't exactly make her somebody you should be having feelings about does it? It shows her for the true coward she is. It shows her for the true cold hearted snake she really is. It shows her for her true lack of respect not only for you, but the relationship she had with you. I could go on but my point is that this is the real her, so you need to start accepting it and USE it as leverage to start telling yourself that you are to good to be loving someone that acts like and treats other people like this.

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Originally Posted by DazzaB

Apart from looking at her profile, I've been keeping well. I occupy my whole day by packing in as many things as possible, but today I'm not doing anything and it's making me think and hurt about her.

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Go running or for a long walk.

I'm doing fine without her, honestly I am. It's been two long months without her and if I hadn't of gone back, I'd probably be over her by now...

I've joined my new college and there's plenty of good looking girls. I like it so that's keeping my mind off her.

I feel for you, I really do, braking up is always so damn hard.

I got to be honest, at 15 she probably want to see what else is out there y'know, she's young and so are you and she has been with you for awhile. I hate to say it but usually these things stay gone, although that is not written in stone, just from past experiences oncea girl says date other people it means she has moved on and will not be coming back.

As for writingher and this and that, I doubt very much that whether you write her or not will make any difference. If she is set on dating others than whether you chat with her on MSN will not change her mind, it will not sway her one way or the other. Although I would lay off it, I mean all you are doing is exposing your feelings to her and making yourself vulnerable, she has all the control.

Back-off, hurt and heal, that's the recipe. I hate that it tastes so bad butwe all got to gotrough it my man, we've all been there and I won't waste your time telling you your going to find someone better and all that jazz, you will I hope, but you'll hurt, its just the way life and relationships works, goodwith the bad.

Best of luck and stay cool.

Thanks for that BMI. I have stopped all contact with her, I feel like I'm in control now and she seems to be doing the chasing.

This week I think I've been happier than I have been in a long while. Maybe that's the sign I'm getting over her. Have to stop looking at her Bebo profile though, that's what's making me hurt even more.

I've realised the relationship is over and I'm doing stuff now that my ex would never have let me do when we were going out (going to housepartys and stuff) but there is still the occasional moment that I miss her.

That's normal, good idea to get rid of anything that you can spy, I deleted my Facebook account because I was lookingat her profile everyday and wondering who was talkingto her and what was going on, it drove me mad. Stay strongand keep doing what you are doing, in acouple of weeks/monthsyou'll feel incontrol and then who knows where the cards may fall.

I was you 5 months ago, I wentthrough the same thing, then ideleted my Facebook and left italone andthen came back 3 months later, we talk now and things may be going toward us getting backtogether or at least well... geting... NEVERTHELESS! You get the picture

Well, I kind of hooked up with my ex's friend, not knowing that they were friends and now gossip is getting about. It'll only be a matter of time before my ex finds out and that'll be us over for good. Probably a blessing in disguise though...