I spoke with police today and they all said that yes, there are possibilities that I am making a mistake, however if I want to leave then I can leave. They also said that if they were in my situation they would leave as well. What they said they would do is meet me somewhere and let me explain the whole situation to them and then we would go back to my house. I would try to talk to my parents and if it wasn't going calmly they would tell me to go grab my stuff and the police would calm him down and tell him why. They would then walk me out of the house to ensure my safety. They agreed I am living in a mentally unhealthy environment and part of growing up is moving out.

Which is nothing different from what we have told you. However, I do find it surprising that the police would get that involved. Sounds more like a small town. I don't see the police in a large city getting involved in what is essentially a domestic dispute and civil matter.

But again, why initiate the confrontation? Why not just leave when he isn't around?

I work with Police Officers/Cops, I've dated them, I've lived with them, I've gone to their AM meetings, I have family members who are Cops - and I've NEVER heard anything like this. To begin with they cannot give anyone legal advice, and telling a person to leave is legal advice. Second, the OP is 18, an adult. She doesn't NEED parental permission (or a Police escort) to leave. Why would the Police get involved?

The Police aren't an escort service. You call them when you need them, not in advance.

Does anyone but me realize the problems the Police could have for advising the OP to leave AND assisting her in doing so when there is absolutely no reason/proof to do so?

Maybe this is in Podunk Falls - but I still doubt it.

Sorry, but I'm not buying any of this.

Judy, some Cops DO act as escorts when a person is moving out of a house when it is a possibly violent situation. They came out to my parents house when I was moving out of there. And I called them a day in advance.

Thanks, Jennie - I'll consider myself corrected on this subject again.

I, of course, can only address my years of law enforcement experience in my area. Very obviously it is different in other areas.

I wasn't saying you were wrong hon. Just that it CAN happen.

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Originally Posted by jenniepepsi

Judy, some Cops DO act as escorts when a person is moving out of a house when it is a possibly violent situation. they came out to my parents house when i was moving out of there. and i called them a day in advance.

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What size town do you live in? I agree that its not unknown for this to be done, but its much more likely in a small town environment. For example, I can see Andy Taylor (Andy Griffith Show) doing that. I can't see Officer Reagan (Blue Bloods) doing it. ;)

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Originally Posted by ScottGem

What size town do you live in? I agree that its not unknown for this to be done, but its much more likely in a small town environment. For example, I can see Andy Taylor (Andy Griffith Show) doing that. I can't see Officer Reagan (Blue Bloods) doing it. ;)

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And I see the Police getting sued if they show up in full view of neighbors to escort a person who is of legal age out of a house when there has been no problem. Now, person calls the Police, they show, no problem.

I see absolutely no reason for the Police to show up in anticipation of a problem.

And, yes, maybe in TV land or very small towns - although I live in a very small Town and that doesn't happen here, either.

EDIT: I'm interested in this, so I called my "family member." He said (and this is in NY) that the rights of one party are NOT superior to the rights of another. For example, the Police would not assist the party moving out by restraining or overseeing the other party UNLESS there are previous Police Reports concerning the individuals. The Police would NOT assume that one party is going to cause a problem for the other (when both are legal adults) unless there are previous Police Reports. The Police would also not be present to "guarantee" that the party moving out doesn't take anything he/she doesn't own.

They WILL take a call when there's a problem in progess.

I'll take his word for it. It very well may be different in small Towns. He felt taking the word of one person showing up at the Police Station but not filing a Report (or not having grounds to file a Report) violates the rights of the second person.

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Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

And, yes, maybe in TV land or very small towns - although I live in a very small Town and that doesn't happen here, either.

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I'm from a NYState Podunk (population was 1500 then, and State Police came when police were called, but never to help an adult move out of a family home without any history of 911 calls, and NEVER to give legal or other advice.

Jen, was there a history in your situation, that the police knew from previous calls there could be trouble brewing?

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

I'm from a NYState Podunk (population was 1500 then, and State Police came when police were called, but never to help an adult move out of a family home without any history of 911 calls, and NEVER to give legal or other advice.

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As you know I'm from West of Podunk (actually in Podunk Falls) and if I stand on my roof I can see your mother's house. Nothing to do with this thread, of course, but interesting... to me.

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Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

As you know I'm from West of Podunk (actually in Podunk Falls) and if I stand on my roof I can see your mother's house. Nothing to do with this thread, of course, but interesting ... to me.

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I thought you recently went back to Big City. And my mother told me you haven't been waving to her lately. Didn't you like her homemade apple pie that she had made specially for you?

(Sorry, Jen, for hijacking the thread.)

I wholeheartedly agree. There have been reasons to question the OP's veracity before. I can understand getting that advice talking to a school counselor or social worker, but not a police officer.

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Originally Posted by ScottGem

What size town do you live in? I agree that its not unknown for this to be done, but its much more likely in a small town environment. For example, I can see Andy Taylor (Andy Griffith Show) doing that. I can't see Officer Reagan (Blue Bloods) doing it. ;)

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I'm in phoenix.
It may be because I called and told them I moved to a DV shelter a few weeks before and I needed to get my daughters bed, and my parents told me never to come back. So the policeman simply informed them that I had a right to the bed that I bought her and they had to let me get it.

I went to the actual police station today, and I live in vegas, big city, and they said the same thing the school police said. But I am leaving tomorrow without notice. They said they would come in advance, but why provoke a problem when I can leave a note and just leave. So, that's what I am doing.

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

I thought you recently went back to Big City. And my mother told me you haven't been waving to her lately. Didn't you like her homemade apple pie that she had made specially for you?

(Sorry, Jen, for hijacking the thread.)

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Lol this isn't my thread my dear.

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Originally Posted by jenniepepsi

im in phoenix.
it may be due to the fact that i called and told them i moved to a DV shelter a few weeks before and i needed to get my daughters bed, and my parents told me never to come back. so the policeman simply informed them that i had a right to the bed that i bought her and they had to let me get it.

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Then I see VERY different circumstances from what has been asked. This makes sense. Asking for assistance in simply moving out when there is no history is something else.

And they weren't giving me any like, "legal advice" they were more stating options that I had and what could possibly result from them. Obviously there are concerns they have with the situation. That's normal though. It's hard to explain exactly what's going on to outsiders and not have it seem ridiculous or like I'm being irrational and uncaring. Im doing what I need to do for me

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Originally Posted by ttaayylloorr18

I went to the actual police station today, and i live in vegas, big city, and they said the same thing the school police said. but i am leaving tomorrow without notice. They said they would come in advance, but why provoke a problem when I can leave a note and just leave. So, thats what i am doing.

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I've been trying to be polite to you, but frankly I don't believe you. I think you keep making things up to counter the holes we keep finding in your story.

You didn't mention it was SCHOOL police you initially spoke to, which makes a big difference. But now you claim you spoke to the Vegas police. Even though you are repeating the same advice we gave you.

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

(Sorry, Jen, for hijacking the thread.)

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Quote:

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Originally Posted by jenniepepsi

lol this isnt my thread my dear.

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I know it isn't. I said "the" thread, since I had interrupted your comments with others regarding your own experience with the police.

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Originally Posted by ttaayylloorr18

they were more stating options that i had and what could possibly result from them.

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That's not what police do either. That's the job of a counselor or social worker or minister.