Ask Me Help Desk - How old is too old?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

Of course he doesn't care. You meet this 28 year old guy ONLINE, he knows you are a minor and doesn't care. This guy is a creep. I wonder how long he'll hang around when he figures out he's not getting any.
Or maybe he will hang around because he can't deal with women his own age.
I know you're tired of the negative, but you asked the question and this guy is a creep.
I'll bet he won't be taking you home introducing his 17 year old friend to his family. This is wrong on a whole lot of levels.
You won't like this, but I think if you had gotten positive attention from your father, we would not be having this conversation. In fact I bet if your father knew about this guy, he would hit the ceiling. I know if you were my daughter, I and my husband would be paying Mr. Wonderful a visit a long with the police.

1.He knows he is not getting any and he is still here.
2.I strongly doubt he is only hanging around because he can't get with women his own age.
3.I'm sure if he still lived in New York with his family He would introduce me.
4.ONCE AGAIN MY FATHER HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH ME LIKING A 28yr old. AND NEVER WILL HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH MY LIFE
5.You could call the cops but what could they do? Nothing unless they had sex. And we didn't

But you guys haven't even met.

Lovely you don't know who this guy is at all. The internet allows people to hide, pretend to be someone other then who they are.

Quote:

Originally Posted by GlindaofOz

But you guys haven't even met.

Lovely you don't know who this guy is at all. The internet allows people to hide, pretend to be someone other then who they are.

Yes that is true glinda
But what if he is who he says he is?

Quote:

Originally Posted by GlindaofOz

But you guys haven't even met.

Lovely you don't know who this guy is at all. The internet allows people to hide, pretend to be someone other then who they are.

You are spot on with that one Glinda! Although yes ths is my real picture lol

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss lovley

1.He knows he is not getting any and he is still here.
2.I strongly doubt he is only hanging around because he can't get with women his own age.
3.I'm sure if he still lived in New York with his family He would introduce me.
4.ONCE AGAIN MY FATHER HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH ME LIKING A 28yr old. AND NEVER WILL HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH MY LIFE
5.You could call the cops but what could they do? nothing unless they had sex. and we didn't

Whens your birthday?

But what if he isn't? Have you really thought about that? How you heard stories about girls who go across the country to meet someone they met online and the person is not at all who they thought they were. Sometimes the person turns out to be a psychopath and kidnaps the girls, kills her or rapes her.

Its easy for him to say that he would never pressure you or that he respects you when he has not been around you. Right now you have no way to see if his words match his actions or if he is who he really says he is.

I would especially be cautious if he is hesitant to come to meet you face to face that is a HUGE flag that he is not who he says he is (under no circumstances should you go out to see him and if he comes to see you do not go alone, please, please listen to that if nothing else).

Oh geeze, this is all about someone she's never actually met? And she believes all the garbage this guy must be feeding her? I'll bet he's really a pimply faced 15 yr old who is laughing at her.

Quote:

Originally Posted by GlindaofOz

But what if he isn't? Have you really thought about that? How you heard stories about girls who go across the country to meet someone they met online and the person is not at all who they thought they were. Sometimes the person turns out to be a psychopath and kidnaps the girls, kills her or rapes her.

Its easy for him to say that he would never pressure you or that he respects you when he has not been around you. Right now you have no way to see if his words match his actions or if he is who he really says he is.

I would especially be cautious if he is hesitant to come to meet you face to face that is a HUGE flag that he is not who he says he is (under no circumstances should you go out to see him and if he comes to see you do not go alone, please, please listen to that if nothing else).

Oh yes of course I would never go and see him and if he did happen to come her and see me then I would meet him in a busy place with a bunch of "friends"

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScottGem

Oh geeze, this is all about someone she's never actually met? And she beleives all the garbage this guy must be feeding her? I'll bet he's really a pimply faced 15 yr old who is laughing at her.

Yea you wish that's why I have pictures of him

Quote:

Originally Posted by cerulean

Whens your birthday?

May why?

How long has this online relationship been going on? Has their been talk of meeting?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss lovley

yea you wish thats why i have pictures of him

They could be pictures of anyone. You have to keep in mind that just because you are being honest does not mean he is. He could have sent pictures of a friend, a cousin, anyone.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss lovley

yes that is true glinda
But what if he is who he says he is?

And what if he's not. You had better be real careful young lady. You don't know what you're dealing with. For all you know he could be a rapist.

This guy could be anybody. He could be 40 years old for all you know. Don't you read the papers or watch the news? You hear stories almost every day about men picking up young girls via the Internet, pretending to be somebody they are not. Then the next thing you know the girl meets this creep and is raped or worse.
You think you are grown and mature, buy you're not using your head.

I'm done with this topic
I know all the safety precautions and what not
And I am sick of you people not trusting my judgement so I am unsubscribing to my own question

Why? Because we are all telling you all the possibilities in this situation?

You seem to think that there is no way this guy is lying. Honey it is HIGHLY likely.

Did i say that i didn't know the possibility oh him being horrible? NO i didn't
Do you people think that i am not aware of these things
I am just sick of hearing about it over and over again
It is possible to meet a good person online
My moms friend did and she was happy until she met someone else

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss lovley

i'm done with this topic
i know all the safety precautions and what not
and i am sick of you people not trusting my judgement so i am unsubscribing to my own question

You don't trust your own judgment, otherwise you would not have asked how old is too old. You can get angry and leave if you want, but you have read all of these words, so they are in your head. You've heard some good advice. I hope you revisit it before I's too late.
I wish you peace and safety

Well I guess you know everything and we collectively on this forum know nothing.

Good luck.

Quote:

Originally Posted by GlindaofOz

Well I guess you know everything and we collectively on this forum know nothing.

Good luck.

I didn't say that i appreacate all of the thoughts you all have shared with me i am just sick of people saying he could be this he could be that

And as of tonigth i am done talking to him because "HE'S A BAD BAD MAN"

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss lovley

DID I SAY THAT I DIDN'T KNOW THE POSSIBILITY OH HIM BEING HORRIBLE? NO I DIDN'T
DO YOU PEOPLE THINK THAT I AM NOT AWARE OF THESE THINGS
I AM JUST SICK OF HEARING ABOUT IT OVER AND OVER AGAIN
IT IS POSSIBLE TO MEET A GOOD PERSON ONLINE
MY MOMS FRIEND DID AND SHE WAS HAPPY UNTIL SHE MET SOMEONE ELSE

It's possible to meet a good person on line, but you must use your head and look for the red flags. You being 17 and he being 28 and not caring that you're a minor is a BIG RED FLAG.
I think you know what is right, you know this guy is bad news, I just hope you do the right thing.

Did you think that maybe there is a problem that you have to keep defending this? Does that not seem weird to you?

The truth of the matter is that you it is not a good idea for you to get attached to this guy until you know who he really is.

You never answered my two questions - how long has this been going on? Has an in person meeting been discussed?

2 weeks and no I wasn't planning on meeting him for at least 6 er 7 months
I just wanted advice on how to fget him here when the time came

Quote:

Originally Posted by GlindaofOz

Did you think that maybe there is a problem that you have to keep defending this? Does that not seem weird to you?

The truth of the matter is that you it is not a good idea for you to get attached to this guy until you know who he really is.

You never answered my two questions - how long has this been going on? has an in person meeting been discussed?

Glinda, you crack me up!

I sense your earnestness and you are a very good person. You want to get at the heart of the problem. You remind me of myself, so I have to laugh. :)

But I wrote something related to this issue in this thread: Here is the link -

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/teens/...le-129948.html

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss lovley

2 weeks and no i wasn't planning on meeting him for at least 6 er 7 months

I know that seems responsible but do you want to get attached to someone who may not be at all who you think he is? If you continue with this relationship I would recommend meeting within the first month. He if refuses you have your answer that he is not who he says he is.

Quote:

Originally Posted by cerulean

Glinda, you crack me up!!

I sense your earnestness and you are a very good person. You want to get at the heart of the problem. You remind me of myself, so I have to laugh. :)

But I wrote something related to this issue in the other thread: Here is the link -

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/teens/...le-129948.html

Thank you! What a nice compliment!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss lovley

2 weeks and no i wasn't planning on meeting him for at least 6 er 7 months
i just wanted advice on how to fget him here when the time came

Advice on how to get him here? He's grown he ought to know that himself. If your looking for advice on how to sneak and meet up with him, forget it. It is my hope, that you have come to the wrong place.

It's either 20/25(your age - 20%=13.6yo/your age + 25%=21.25yo) or half your age + 7(15.5). Haha

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss lovley

i'm done with this topic
i know all the safety precautions and what not
and i am sick of you people not trusting my judgement so i am unsubscribing to my own question

Guess what, I felt that way after a few days of reading your bits and pieces. You didn't even have the courage to come up with the whole story right from the start, so you were not asking for advice, you were looking for an argument, and baby.. you got one.

You probably don't talk to your parents much, beause I think you Always have to be right...

Get real!

http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/15/15_11_2.gifBetter luck next time.

That's your opinion I don't think that you need to know all my business that's wwhy I didn't tell you

And about me not telling my parents it is not because I have to be right because my mother doesn't need to know everything that is going on in my life
And if if my mother dissaproved I would still do it
It is my life and if I choose to mess it up so be it I have to learn from my mistakes

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss lovley

thats your opinion i don't think that you need to know all my business thats wwhy i didn't tell you

If you want the best advice, then you need to tell us the whole story.
I

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss lovley

t is my life and if i choose to mess it up so be it i have to learn from my mistakes

But isn't that why you asked us? So you could benefit from our knowledge and experience and AVOID making a mistake?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss lovley

thats your opinion i don't think that you need to know all my business thats wwhy i didn't tell you

and about me not telling my parents it is not because i have to be right because my mother doesn't need to know everything that is going on in my life
and if if my mother dissaproved i would still do it
it is my life and if i choose to mess it up so be it i have to learn from my mistakes

I'm assuming you still live in your mother's house and because you are a minor, if something happened to you your mother is still responsible and liable. So what you do is in fact your mother's business.
But you're sounding like a teenager who is having a tantrum because someone is not agreeing with what she wants to do. Bottom line is, we all know you will eventually do what you want, but you came to us with the question. You have received some good and sound advice and also some pretty understanding ears, I hope you do the mature thing and heed it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss lovley

thats your opinion i don't think that you need to know all my business thats wwhy i didn't tell you

and about me not telling my parents it is not because i have to be right because my mother doesn't need to know everything that is going on in my life
and if if my mother dissaproved i would still do it
it is my life and if i choose to mess it up so be it i have to learn from my mistakes

But some mistakes are beyond just "learning."

I would also like to point out that the "mistake" of meeting this guy could kill you or rape you or otherwise harm you.

Not a mistake I'd want to make.

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScottGem

If you want the best advice, then you need to tell us the whole story.
i

But isn't that why you asked us? So you could benefit from our knowledge and experience and AVOID making a mistake?

No not at all I asked for your opinion just to see if you all thought ti was a bad idea
Eaither way I was still going to talk to him and I still am

Quote:

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

I'm assuming you still live in your mother's house and because you are a minor, if something happened to you your mother is still responsible and liable. So what you do is in fact your mother's business.
But you're sounding like a teenager who is having a tantrum because someone is not agreeing with what she wants to do. Bottom line is, we all know you will eventually do what you want, but you came to us with the question. You have recieved some good and sound advice and also some pretty understanding ears, I hope you do the mature thing and heed it.

I am doing what I want I am loving every second of it

Quote:

Originally Posted by GlindaofOz

I would also like to point out that the "mistake" of meeting this guy could kill you or rape you or otherwise harm you.

Not a mistake I'd want to make.

Well I understand my limits and I'm not going to cross them at this moment but a month from now who knowws

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss lovley

no not at all i asked for your opinion just to see if you all thought ti was a bad idea
eaither way i was still going to talk to him and i still am

Yeah right! That is not why people ask questions on places like this. Either they are genuinely looking for advice or they are hoping someone will support what they want to do so they can feel better about doing it.

You obviously fall into the latter group. Since you had already committed yourself in your own mind, you had to deal with the almost universal advice against you.

Yeah I agree, you shuld only date men that are 3 years within your age limit. But once you are 18 u can date whoever you want

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss lovley

i am doing what i want i am loving every second of it

Then I guess you're done here then Huh? I really do hope you're smarter than you are appearing to be. I hope this is just a stubborn streak and that you are the mature teenage girl you want us to think you are.
I sincerely wish you the best.