I meant when I'm on school holidays my hours at work are the same as when I'm at school.This week is the first week I've had off in ages I'm on paid leave I get four weeks holiday a year paid for. I don't want to talk to her anymore I don't see how it will make a difference were just never going to get along its usless. I don't care anyway she can yell at me all ahe likes I'm just no going to listen anymore.I know she is upset at me for taking the pills but I'm sick of being treated like this I just wish my dad was here he would understand I always got along good with dad

Honey, in all honesty, she is worried about losing you like she lost her husband. Those pills can be deadly in that combination.

Look at it this way... You lost your dad. Wouldn't you be mad as he! If you knew your mother was driving drunk every day and you were afraid you could lose her at any time and be alone in this world?

She cares for you. Sure she may have overreacted, but she's scared. She's afraid you will die too, as far as the pills go.

As far as the boyfriend, I know you told us you broke up with him, but she's afraid you will get pregnant and you won't reach your full potential.

I can tell you that if I found out my 17 year old was following the same dangerous path you are, I wouldn't be as lenient as your mother is. My daughter would be on "house arrest." I would be taking her from school and picking her up. The door to her room would be removed and while she was at school every day I would be searching her room. No phone, no TV, no cell phone, no computer.

While you may think that this is your body and you can do with it what you want, that is further from the truth. You may be mature, but you don't have the life experience to make such life changing decisions.

Believe it or not, but it's the truth, your brain is not yet fully developed at this point in your life. You are ten feet tall and bullet proof. Children your age all think "this won't happen to me." You haven't experienced enough of the real world to know that these things DO happen to kids like you.

You seem extremely intelligent and very driven to get the things you want out of life. But you fail to see the bigger picture.

Did you ever think that you are so wrapped up in your own wants and needs, that you fail to understand your mom is hurting too? She is the one with no one who listens to her, or loves her, or can protect her. You are lucky, and don't know it.

I know I'm lucky I thik about that everyday, I could have lost both my parents.I know mum is hurting and I do love her and care for her.Am I being selfish to want to talk to my mum I don't want to have a relationship like this with her I want to be able to talk to her and not be yelled at. I know I can be bad tempered and yell at her I know were not always going to get along but it upsets me that she either yells or just doesn't talk to me you have no idea how frustrating that is. Id rather be punished then just ignored.I know from reading what yous have said about my boyfriend that I made the wrong choice in dating him and sleeping with him and the pills probably weren't the best way to keep up with my studies and I'm going to change that but it would have been nice to just be able to talk to my mum about it. Im not trying to complain about her but I just feel like when I lost my dad I lost mum to, she never use to yell at me and they always had time to listen to what I had to say even if they didn't agree with it they still listened.

Do your best, to do the right things, and I feel you will both start the healing process, and talk and listen to each other. It may take time, but it will happen.

I'm coming into this thread late, but I've read all the posts, and I have one suggestion.

Tazma, how would you feel about letting your mom read this thread? She can read all of your posts, and all of the responses you've received. Maybe if she hears from strangers how we view what you've posted, it will urge her to get both of you some counseling, so that you can try to form some sort of relationship.

I've never lost a spouse (knock on wood) but I did lose both of my parents within 6 1/2 months of each other. I was very angry, very lost, and very hurt when that happened. For a long time I just wanted to die myself. I wasn't a child, I was 30 when they died, and I had a child of my own, but I needed them, still do, and their loss still affects me to this day.

I know you lost your dad, and I'm so very sorry that you had to go through that. Your mom lost her husband. She lost the man that was supposed to be by her side forever. The man that would help her pay the bills, help her raise you, be there for her when she was sad, or needed someone to talk to. It's only been 2 years. Two years isn't that long sweetie. She's still grieving, and it sounds like she doesn't know how to handle that grief. Instead of holding you in her arms and letting you know how much she loves you, and doesn't want to lose you, she yells because she's afraid that you will make a decision that will either kill you (the pills) or ruin your life forever (sex with a 21 year old man).

Most of the people that have answered your question are parents. Many of us have kids close to your age. All of us would die for our kids, because that's what parents do. We love you kids beyond reason. You are our reason for living, and we want only the best for you. When you talk about your mom what I hear is that she loves you very much. You're all she has left. She just doesn't know how to communicate that.

You both need to be able to learn to talk to each other, to communicate without hurting each other. You both need counseling before you end up destroying your relationship completely.

Urge her to come here and read your thread, maybe we can get through, and both of you can learn how to deal with each other and make the time you have together less hostile.

Is that something you're willing to do?

Do you think it will make a difference if she read this I don't want to upset her if she reads that I wrote I hate her. I don't won't to make things worse won't she get mad that I wrote stuff about her. I don't know I don't want to make things worse.HOw would you react to what I wrote? If you think it's a good idea ill ask her but I don't want to make things worse

Tazma, if you decide to show it this thread to her, be honest about being angry, hurt and frustrated when you wrote some of the posts.

I don't think anyone here believes you actually hate your mother. I think you love her a lot, but you are hurting as much as she is.

She may be hurt, but, hopefully, she will also realize how much you are hurting.

How are you feeling about your mother now that you are calming down and seeing things from a different perspective?

Im really upset with her at the moment I came home from being out and she started yelling at me acussing me of seeing my boyfriend well ex she said some pretty nasty things I can't believe she would say them things to me I'm not even going to bother to get her to read what I wrote what's the point. I just needed to get out of the house away from her its not easy being in the same house as her anymore I can't handle it.I love her but she had no right to call me them names.I tired to bite my tongue and walk away but I just couldn't I needed to defend myself, I think I just made it worse she told me I was grounded,I've never been grounded,she said that if I don't start being good she is going to send me to boarding school. I don't care she can send me away I would love that get away from her. Seriously I don't know what she wonts from me I stopped seeing my ex which wasn't that easy and I haven't touched any of the pills. If she doesn't even trust me when I go out to see friends then she can just send me away. She has really hurt my feelings saying those things I don't believe my own mother would say those things how could she. And I just wanted things to get better between us now I don't care I can't stop crying and I hate her

Hun, I am very sorry she is calling you names and yelling at you. That is really hurtful.

You also should understand that you broke her trust and trust is not easily earned and even harder to earn back.

The best thing you can do right now is not to yell back. Be extremely polite and use your manners. Listen to everything she says and follow ALL rules. Work hard around the house, do dishes, laundry, vacuum, etc.

She is very hurt and angry at your recent behavior. It's going to take a while for this to blow over.

It's a bit hard not to yell back at her when she is being so nasty, I know I messed up but she doesn't have to say them things to me. Im trying to do the best I can.I just feel so depressed at the moment I just won't to lock myself in my room and never come out.I feel really bad I said some pretty nasty things to her myself I tried to say sorry but she just told me to go away she doesn't want to see me everything is falling apart I can't believe its like this.I think she should just send me to boarding school at least then she will have time to be away from me seeing as she is so angry with me.I didn't ever think what I was doing was going to have such an impact on our relationship boy was I wrong everything is a mess.Before she went into my room everything was fine we never really talked much but at least we didn't argue and she didn't yell at me.

Right now it's just time to be quiet and do exactly as she says. When things calm down in a day or two you need to go to her and tell her you are sorry. Make her a card or a gift, leave it on her pillow before she goes to sleep.

I also am coming to this thread late. Wow, is all I can say. If this wasn't me 22 years ago I don't know who it was. I was there. I know how you are feeling. My mom always went through my room. She read my diary. Ripped me apart. To this day I won't keep a journal because of what she had done. But at the same time you are lucky. I wish I had your mom. Mine, didn't care. I was the last of six. An abortion before I was born and one after I was born. Lucky I am here right? She also buried two sons. Broke up the marriage and I was left home with her. She couldn't care less. She read my diary and loved it. She had things to gossip about. She didn't care I had drinking issues back then. Still do and she still loves to gossip about it. She thrived on all my negatives so she could run me down around town. But I turned out OK. I stand tall. I am a proud mother of a 7 year old son with two college degrees. I worked hard for what I have and am happy for that.

You be happy for her concerns. You be happy you didn't lose both parents at the same time. You be happy you have a roof over your head and you have someone keeping you fed and warm. One thing I don't understand is you being 15 and paying half the bills? Makes no sense to me.

Look at her feelings. She lost her husband. She is alone as you feel you are. She is now alone with a teenage daughter. She has never had a teenage daughter before I am assuming. You have never been a 15 year old before. Your learning the ropes together. Each day is a new day. I am sure she is aching inside for her loss as you are to. You are given this chance to open new doors and make this work. Talk to her. First of all, if you knew what you were doing was right then why didn't she know? Pills? 21 year old? She would have known if it was OK. Now is the time to open up and talk. Tell her your struggles. Tell her your sorry and you miss your father as equally as she misses her husband. Half her "quietness" could be stemming from her pain inside. Having to now raise you alone. Its hard being a parent. No matter what age you are. We worry sick. I worry sick nonstop. My son says I need to be on "The Worlds Strickest Parents" he is maybe right. I have him in a bubble.

Please let her look at this thread. So what if you said you hated her. I hear it all the time. I know its not for real. This is your chance to open the lines of communication and make things better and right.

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Originally Posted by tazma95

Do you think it will make a difference if she read this i dont want to upset her if she reads that i wrote i hate her. I dont wont to make things worse wont she get mad that i wrote stuff about her. I dont know i dont want to make things worse.HOw would you react to what i wrote? If you think its a good idea ill ask her but i dont want to make things worse

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How would I react? I'd be hurt, but not because of the words you said, but because I made you feel that way. I'd be upset that you're so desperate for my love and attention, my praise and pride, that you're willing to hurt your own body by taking pills just to make me proud of you.

I'd be sad that I mad you feel this way. I'd be sad that I spent so much time on my own grief that I forgot that you're grieving too. I'd be angry at myself for not realizing sooner that I'm part of the problem.

That's how I'd feel if I were your mother and I read this thread.

Then, after drying my eyes, I'd give you a hug, tell you how sorry I am, and I'd find some way for the two of us to get back our relationship, to work together, to be a family instead of just two people living in the same house, feeling the same sorrow.

You're a kid. I know you don't want to believe that, but you really are still a kid. There's too much on your plate, too much for you to handle alone, and your mom should be helping you. Being a teen is hard.

If the two of you could learn to talk to each other, if you could rebuild the trust she once had in you, I think you two would have an awesome relationship. You just have to find some way to bridge the gap.

Your thread really got to me. I don't usually take the time to read many of the teen threads on this site. Too many of them are "I want, I deserve, I'm so mature", when it's very obvious that they aren't. In most of those threads the teens are the problem. You made a lot of mistakes, but when the wise people of this site told you the dangers you listened. Not right away, but eventually you listened and realized the danger of the things you were doing, and you stopped. I'm proud of you, and I think that if your mom read this thread from beginning to end, and saw the progress you've already made, and the pain that you're feeling, she would understand that you're a good kid, you just need some guidance, not yelling, not screaming, but rules, and a lot of love.

If it were me, I'd ask my mom to read this thread. It may make her upset at first, but I really think that once she reads not only your posts but ours, that maybe a light bulb will go off in her head, and she'll realize that some of the this is on her, and that it's not too late to fix things between the two of you.

I hope you continue to post. I can't be your mother, but I can tell you that I care about what happens to you. You got lucky, you stumbled onto a site that I would let my own kids post on. The people here are the best people I've never met, and I'd trust every one of them with my kids. We may not be able to fix your problems, but we can listen, we can give you advice, and we can lend a shoulder for you to lean on if you need it.

A boat load of greenies to Alty.

I am still wondering why at 15 your paying half the bills. Could you explain that? Your just a baby. (in a sense to us old hags here)

You could help your case a lot by being considerate. Let your mom know where your off to when you "just need some air" either by telling her or leaving a note . Then she won't have to worry and think the worst, when you disappear.

I would have you doing that any way. There are probably many small things you could do to tone down on her yelling at you if you thought about it before you acted. Its not that hard. Just think of how others, especially your mom, perceive what you want to do. Parents are not mind readers. And we do fear the worse.

I probably exaggerated a bit when I said I pay half the bills its not half mum just thinks that I should contribute the to the house so I can learn to manage money and how to pay bills.I give her 200 a fortnight I work a lot and earn good money so I don't mind. I know I have to be considerate tell her where I'm going well I suppose I should ask her really if I can go. Im just not use to it she never really cared before well she did care she just trusted me before. That's something I have to work on doing. I feel really bad after having a fight with her and have been trying really hard to do all the right things and I've kind of just been staying out of her way.Im not sure about getting her to read this yet I don't want her to get angry with me

A simple apology for being a brat, maybe?? That usually worked for me when I had to correct bad behavior from my own kids... they still were grounded though, and had to serve it out.

Why not a big hug? Why not just open the discussion and work things out.

Your both going to be fine. Your growing and it's a tough age in general. No matter what. She is still grieving I am sure also. Together you will have bad times and good times. But together you will grow. One day you may resent her. The next you may find she is your best friend. She may also share those feelings. Nothing in life is easy. But in the end when you're an adult you will see the big picture and thank her for her troubles. She will probably even tell you that you are a good kid.

I wish it was that easy to give her a big hug believe me there have been heaps of times when I've really wanted to. Its not that easy to talk to her when she's so mad. I know where not always going to have good times but and were going to argue but it would be nice to have some good times. I know mum is still sad about dad but I don't know what to say to her I don't like saying anything about him it makes her sad and it makes me get upset to.I know I deserved to get grounded for saying those things to her I haven't complained about it and I have been doing what yous said doing things around my jobs around the house plus extra. I've been giving her heaps of space keeping right out of her way. Hopfully she will stop being angry with me

Here is another thought of mine. It seems we have two issues here. How your mother reacted to something she found in your room. Also it came out that your father has passed away. Honestly I don't think her anger is directed at you fully. I think its just coming across that way. I am sure for a fact she is angry with your choices. Parents are like that. You have to understand she is now dealing with this alone. What would have been minor anger before you father passed away is now going to be full blown anger. She lost her partner. No one to talk this over with and no one to turn to when she is afraid. I truly think if you can get her to open up the communication on these feelings it will be good for you both. You can explain your stress with work and school also. You only have each other now. You have to talk. If you keep letting her be angry and silent where will that get you? Just a bigger wedge between you both. She needs you just as much as you need her right now. If you can break that barrier I think you might be surprised how much the conversation will flow.

I talked to my mum about working so much and not being able to get my homework done in the little time I have left she said she didn't know I had so much to do so she said if I don't quit my job she will talk to my boss her friend about cutting my hours down on the condition that I go see a councilor about taking the pills, why I was sleeping with a 21 year old and my additude. Im happy spending less time working but I don't want to go talk to someone, I don't really see what the point in that is. I don't think I have a bad attitude. But I don't want to upset her so I will go at least once anyway

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Originally Posted by tazma95

i talked to my mum about working so much and not being able to get my homework done in the little time i have left she said she didnt know i had so much to do so she said if i dont quit my job she will talk to my boss her friend about cutting my hours down on the condition that i go see a councilor about taking the pills, why i was sleeping with a 21 year old and my additude. Im happy spending less time working but i dont want to go talk to someone, i dont really see what the point in that is. I dont think i have a bad attitude. But i dont want to upset her so i will go at least once anyway

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Attitude is a matter of perspective. And right now your mother feels you not only have lost respect for her but also and more importantly for yourself. Talking to someone may give you the opportunity to explore yourself and your goals and to teach you how to better manage and balance your life. Just look at is as another class and also in making your mom happy by mending some of the bridges before they get burned. Your heading on the right track and I pray you have the strength to see yourself and your future. Your on your way to a new life and this is a first and very huge step to a winning attitude. Good Luck.

Great news on cutting down your work hours. Your to young to have that kind of work load anyway.

As far as the counselor, go. I went to a marriage counselor a couple years back. I also thought it was foolish. But you know what it was great. They are an outsider, like we are, looking in on your life. Hearing your story. They see things your missing. They can have your mother in the room also and together you can get things on the table. Counselors hear the story in a way your not telling it. You honestly can't fool them as easy as you think. I encourage it. You may even find your taking the pills for other reasons and using school and work as the excuse. I don't know I am just saying. Do the sessions. It will be good.

Having someone to talk to, and LISTEN to you will help immensely, and move you to see things in a different way, and set your mom at ease that you are listening to her, and trying your best. That will bring you together, as things are already turning your way for the better, as she did listen about the work hours.

Do your part now, and don't stand in the way of progress. This is the path to getting what you want most, your mom to talk and listen to you, she wants to in the worst way, but she has to trust you first, and now you have the opportunity to restore that trust by co operating. You will learn much, and gain even more.

I am so glad you talked to your mother. I am even happier that she listened. :)

I know you don't see the point in counseling right now, but give it a couple of sessions. It isn't as much about the attitude, pills, and sex as it is a safe place to explore the feelings behind all of that including the anger and grief.

Good luck and remember that we are still here, too. :)

Wow, you all need to just stop harping on Taz. She may be 15 but it appears to me that she has a job and also carries a school work load. Taz, I was in your situation once and yes, she can charge your boyfriend with rape even if you did consent. Do you have a close adult friend (other than your boyfriend) you could talk with? Sometimes that helps. It's hard being a teen and I'm glad to hear that you are responsible enough to be taking the pill. However, you do live in your mothers home and are paying bills to help out. But even though you are mother/daughter you are also room mates who need to set down some ground rules. Mum's can be scary to talk too. Your mum is only watching out for your best interest. She is still responsible for you until you become of legal age. As how to get her to talk to you, well, that one's hard. It sounds to me like you have tried to talk with your calmly. Here is when I would see if talking to a close family friend would help. Sometimes mum's need another adult to help them understand what their child needs from them, and how to listen! Good luck :)

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wow, you all need to just stop harping on Taz.

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GrandmaJ, did you actually read the thread? No one is "harping" on Taz. In fact, we've been and continue to be very supportive of her.

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Originally Posted by GrandmaJ

wow, you all need to just stop harping on Taz. She may be 15 but it appears to me that she has a job and also carries a school work load. Taxi was in your situation once and yes, she can charge your boyfriend with rape even if you did consent. Do you have a close adult friend (other than your boyfriend) you could talk with? Sometimes that helps. It's hard being a teen and I'm glad to hear that you are responsible enough to be taking the pill. However, you do live in your mothers home and are paying bills to help out. But even though you are mother/daughter you are also room mates who need to set down some ground rules. Mum's can be scary to talk too. Your mum is only watching out for your best interest. She is still responsible for you until you become of legal age. As how to get her to talk to you, well, that one's hard. It sounds to me like you have tried to talk with your calmly. Here is when I would see if talking to a close family friend would help. Sometimes mum's need another adult to help them understand what their child needs from them, and how to listen! Good luck :)

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You need to read the whole thread.
She has been sympathized with and helped tremendously, and by the end if this, if you get that far, you will see that things are working out quite well.

Wow you, your mom and this thread has come a long way.
Do your counseling. You'll be surprised by how much this will help you.
We all wish you well.

Everyone has been really nice to me and gave me great advice, I think things would have been worse if I didn't find thid site thank you everyone.

I'm a counselor and want to give you the same hint I give every one of my clients.

Here's what I say: "The counseling sessions are for YOU, not for me. YOU are in control. Everything is for YOU. That means if you are confused at what's going on, if you don 't agree with me, if you want to say something while I'm talking, or if you want a timeout, hold up your hand like it's got a stop sign pasted on your palm. That will be my signal to stop and look at you and wait for you to speak."

Taz, make a deal in the beginning with your counselor that you cooperate with him/her like I do with my clients. This will keep both of you involved in the counseling work, and the two of you will feel like partners. It will guarantee that you won't leave a session feeling like you've been misunderstood or not listened to or ignored.

Does that make sense?

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Everyone has been really nice to me and gave me great advice, I think things would have been worse if I didn't find thid site thank you everyone.

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It's a pleasure helping someone like you. If you hadn't been receptive to what we said, if you hadn't listened, accepted, and done the work we asked you to do, we wouldn't be here.

It's a two way street. We can't help someone that's not willing to get the help. You were open to accept that help, and I for one am very proud of you and all that you've already accomplished since you started this thread.

You're a good person, which is why we're all sticking around, and why we're all here to see you through this. :)

I'm a bit worried about going to see a counselor I have no idea what to exspect when I get there. Or what I'm suppose to say. I want to make my mum happy by doing this and you all think it's a good idea but I'm not sure. Its easy to sit on the computer and type what's going on but talking about it with someone is different. I have an appointment on Monday and I'm not sure if I really want to go. I wanted to talk to mum about it but I don't want her to think I'm just making excuses not to go and get mad. I don't know what to do I get really nervouse and shy around people I don't know.

What exactly happens when you see a counselor? I find it hard just to talk to someone I don't know.

Don't worry, it will be all right. The counsellor will ask you some questions and you just have to be honest. He most surely know his job (if that's a he) and knows what to ask you in the best possible way to make you at ease. Of course you'll be nervous and shy at first, but with time you'll see that you'll get more at ease and you'll feel relieved.

As you say, typing what's going on is something, and talking about it is something else. When you'll be talking to the counsellor, you'll feel even better. Also now, you will be slowly regaining the trust of your mum.

Don't worry, it will definitely help you much more than you can think of :) You have already gone quite some way in the process of rebuilding a good relationship with your mum, just go on moving forwards and things will turn out right!

Good luck and don't give up! :)

It may be awkward at first but, as you get familiar with your counselor, you will get quite comfortable.

Just be very, very honest, as this is between the two of you.

I too have been very impressed with your open mind, and think you are a good person, just a bit hurt right now, but your healing started when you reached out for help. That was a great, responsible, adult choice you made to be honest, and not an easy one.

Despite your past mistakes, you have great potential, and I am very proud of you. We all are. We will still be here with you through this whole thing give you as much support as we can.

I have to say in my opinion I think a counselor is better then we are here. Only for the reason being its face to face. He/she can read your body language and expressions while we can't. We only see these words and can interpret them in any way our mood sees fit that day. That can't happen in a session. Personally I liked it. Just answer openly and honestly. Its amazing all the doors it can open once you start talking.

As a counselor, I always started the first session by just chatting with my new client about school, pets, favorite foods, the best vacation ever taken, etc. -- like two strangers on the bus or at a sporting event. The sessions usually last 50 minutes, so as I noticed the client getting comfortable and smiling and having a relaxed face, I would ask, "How can I help you today?" or some such question.

Almost always somewhere along the way during one of the sessions, I would hear, even from the men, "I feel like I've found a new friend." Of course, I didn't want to be just a "new friend." I wanted to be the best friend they had ever had -- one who could not only listen and empathize, but one who could help them make goals and solve the problems that were vexing them. I didn't want to push MY solutions on them, but help them examine all their choices and decide on the best solutions for themselves.

Being a counselor is like helping a client put together a 500 or 750 or even a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle. Sometimes the pieces don't fit together correctly, so we have to rethink which piece goes there and try a different one... or another one. In the end, both of us want to end up with a beautiful picture.

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Originally Posted by tazma95

im a bit worried about going to see a counselor i have no idea what to exspect when i get there. Or what im suppose to say. I want to make my mum happy by doing this and you all think its a good idea but im not sure. its easy to sit on the computer and type whats going on but talking about it with someone is different. I have an appointment on monday and im not sure if i really want to go. I wanted to talk to mum about it but i dont want her to think im just making excuses not to go and get mad. i dont know what to do i get really nervouse and shy around people i dont know.

what exactly happens when you see a counselor? I find it hard just to talk to someone i dont know.

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I used to feel exactly the same way you do.

When I first came to this site, I asked a few harmless questions, made a few friends, and then, one day, I decided to tell everyone on this site about my past.

I started a thread about it, let all my feelings, all the crap I'd gone through, pour out. It wasn't easy, because I had made many friends here, I didn't feel as anonymous as I did when I first joined the site, but I was still anonymous. All the wonderful people on this site pooled together to support me, like we're doing for you.

The main response from most of them was for me to get counseling. I hated the idea. Like you, it was easy for me to talk about it all here, anonymously. I didn't think I could talk to a counselor face to face.

I put it off for a long time. I thought just coming here to talk about it would be enough. Don't get me wrong, coming here helped tremendously. The people on this site are the best people I've never met. I adore every one of them.

After a few months, I realized they were right, so I gave counseling a chance.

I still have past issues. That will never go away. But, because of counseling, I've been able to deal with things I've put off dealing with for 35 years. Counseling has helped me a great deal.

The first few sessions were the hardest, and I'm telling you right now, it can take some time to find the right counselor. I went through 3 before I found the one that was right for me. Once I found her it was smooth sailing. It took some time for me to open up, but once I did, once I realized she would never judge, she was only there to listen, and to guide me, then it became easier.

The best advice I can give you is to be yourself. Be honest. As your counselor, everything you say to her is confidential. She cannot ever tell a soul about the things you discuss. If you let it all out, if you're honest not only with yourself, but her, then you'll get a lot from the sessions.

I can say without a doubt that I'm a much better person emotionally, and a much better mother, because of the counseling I've gone through.

I still see her on occasion. It's not a regular thing anymore, because she's helped me so much that I don't need to see her all the time.

Give it a chance. Be open to it. I really do think this could help you a great deal.

Taz,

I am in very late here and really can't add to the excellent advice you been given by this great group of people you have been involved with here at this site.
You hit the jackpot here which I think by now and by your response you too realize what a bunch of wonderful caring people they are.

What I really want to say is how impressed I am with you.
At 15 to be holding down a job and staying in school is terrific.

But when you had a problem, you didn't just rebel and run off to throw your life away like so many do.
You sought help.

And when you started getting input you didn't like , you still listened and kept bringing up points of your own to counter.

Then you absolutely amazed me and acted on the advice you were given.
You have shown maturity way beyond your years and I am sure you will see the rewards now, but even more so in the future.

With your intellect , attitude, and ambition I think your future is going to be extremely bright.
Thank God you can listen and have the courage to act.
Thank God for people like you that care enough to work on finding solutions that will be good for all involved.

The only thing I will add is that I refused counselling when it came to a point in my life that was traumatic.
I was against it 100%. But I finally relented and found it to be extremely rewarding.
I now think everybody should go.
It can be one of the best things that has happened for you.
Give it a chance.

To all that have posted here :

It is threads like this that me proud to be involved with you all.
You have all gone above and beyond and I think made a real difference in a life that is worth all the time and effort it has taken , and may still take.

God bless the entire lot of you.