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Here are some 24/7 hotline numbersQuote:
Originally Posted by Jordan Christin
If you feel like you want to commit suicide please call : 1-800-SUICIDE
If you feel like running away from home please call: 1-800-843-5200
If you feel lonely and depressed please call: 1-800-448-3000
Sometimes you may not get an answer right away on AskMeHelpDesk and a hotline could better help you. You can also always look in your phone book for any other hotlines!
We're always here for support.
Sarah
Christin, this is what we- your friends- have been telling you. Let him go! You die, I die. After I take the blame on him XD
Please let him go. Look after yourself. Your life is in front of you not tangled up in a web of confused emotions. Hugs
Nice to know that your friend signed up on AMHD just to tell you this on the boards...Quote:
Originally Posted by Sorrow
Sarah
K well I know that I am so over him because today I really didn't want to talk to him and I hated his guts more then ever. But what I don't understand is why he leaves his friends to come over to talk to me and my friends. I DON'T UNDERSTAND AT ALL IT'S CONFUSING!!
Don't hate him. It's a waste of time and energy. It's pointless. Move on- that's all.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jordan Christin
He probably is embarrassed to talk to you with his or your friends around. Anyway.. it doesn't really matter why he does it- just be brief with him, he causes a lot of emotional stress for you.
Move on Jordan Christin.. move on.
Sarah
I know I am moving on but the thing is that he is being so nice to me now that I really don't want to talk to him. He comes from no where just to talk to me when I have my friends around. And then he just hangs with us and listens to our conversation. It's annoying me and I hate his guts!!
Don't let him get to you. You should have better control over yourself.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jordan Christin
He's just a boy not some magical being that poops out wonders...
He's probably feeling great and not bothered or carrying the attitude you are. Why should you make this into a big deal? I know your in your teens and break ups are part of it- but ultimately it's up to you if you want to make this into a crisis or not. I wouldn't want to, why be stressed out with drama, if I could be happy and just move on...
If you have such a big problem with him being there then just leave. Make new friends- it's not impossible.
Sarah
I know I have made new friends but whenever I am with them and he sees me he just comes over. And the only thing is that I am trying to leave him so I can be happy and feel better but he keeps popping up to talk to me which I don't know why.
Guess what!! I just got my ex back and he is going to let me prove myself!! The best thing is that everything is going fine!!
What does he mean prove yourself?is he going to prove himself as well? This is NOT what you want to hear I realise that but you shouldn't have to PROVE ANYTHING.
Well before we broke up I told him that I figured out everything that I needed to do in a relationship and I figured out everything I wanted and needed to do, but he broke up with me cause he was upset that he wouldn't have anything to do or see me. But soon I went over to his house and he was going to teach me poker, but soon he started trying to take my phone away and we started touching each other and hugging and all that stuff. I told him that if he didn't stop that I would kiss him on the cheek and yet he didn't care and soon he started kissing me back! Soon he still wanted my phone and then I told him if he wanted it he needed to let me have a chance and I would give him the phone. Then it was about time for me to leave and just before I did leave he gave me a kiss on the lips!! It was the best ever and I am so glad he is doing this for me!! I LOVE HIM!!
You had to give him your phone? so that he would get back with you? Why??
Because he really wanted to see what was on the phone and plus we still like each other very much and it's just hard not to have each other.
Its always hard to do the right things because the wrong things always are more attractive and appealing.Giving in to this boy is what you want to do more than anything,so it doesn't matter on what flimsy terms you are getting back or whether its right for you or good for you to get back,you will still do it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jordan Christin
Your type of personality looks cut out to be the kind that will only learn her lessons after getting hurt and burnt.You don't have it in you to protect yourself from hurt,by not giving in,by staying away,by guarding yourself from the things or people that are bad for you,even when you sense that things are not right.Its like you are inviting the whole wide world out there to "COME HURT ME" just because you have built up an imaginary picture of someone in your mind.
All of us posting to you on this forum feel this boy's playing with you and treating you shamefully but your mind sees only the picture you have built of him.So no matter what we say,I think you will just do what you want,which is continue playing second fiddle to him and always feeling hurt and heartbroken at his silly behaviour.You will maybe even find excuses for the hurt you feel from all this and start blaming him for all that when its entirely your decision to go back.
I sound harsh and maybe its because I can see what you can't see--that you are in clear danger of getting badly hurt and you can so easily prevent that even now by doing the one thing that's right and good for you:WALK AWAY with your head held high.But before doing that,make it very clear to the boy that the only reason you are doing that is you don't accept the terms of this relationship and feel you deserve more than he can give,which is why you CHOOSE to walk away.
Learn to stand up for yourself Christin.Learn it hard and well,because end of the day,no one else will do it for you.Some of us here have learnt this lesson at a much later age and stage than you are now,and after quite a bit of hurt and pain.Let us help you believe that life's much much more than this silly boy or any boy for that matter.YOU AS A PERSON,AS A YOUNG WOMAN,HAVE A PURPOSE IN BEING BORN IN TUCSON USA UNLIKE MILLIONS OF OTHERS OUT THERE IN THE DARK AND COLD,HUNGRY,UNCLOTHED AND POOR.SO COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS AND LEARN TO LOVE AND APPRECIATE WHAT YOU HAVE ,WHAT YOU CAN DO ,THE FUN YOU CAN HAVE INSTEAD OF LOSING IT ALL FOR A BOY WHO LOOKS LIKE HE CAN JUST TWIST YOU AROUND HIS FINGER.
What's it going to take for you to stop being foolish, and letting this guy play you? What is it you need to see, to know that your acting like your so desperate, you can be treated like an old shoe to be used any way he wants?
I really want to know.
Me and you both.
Well both of us have tried staying away from each other for a whole month. After our break up we both start to hate life in some way. But after we see each other we still have those feelings for each other and we also start to throw ourselves at each other. It's impossible to stay away from each other.
Well keep us posted.
Thats not true, but at least get some respect, don't you think? He shoots you a load of bull, then he disrespects you. He is manipulating your feelings my dear.Quote:
It's impossible to stay away from each other.
That's sad you allow your intense feelings, to over rule your common sense. That's not love.
But why is he doing that then?
I am in a great relationship with I guy I really like! I go over to his house or to his soccer games about once every week. Sometimes when I am at his house we would be hanging out laying down on the floor or something. I would tell him how much I love him and how happy I am that I have him, But every time I do he say "Why? I am not good enough and you can find someone better then me." What does that mean? Why does he keep saying that?
Thanks for anyone who answers.
I have been wondering a lot about this lately. What is the key for a long, wonderful relationship? How do you stay with the one you want?
Thanks to anyone who answers!
He might just be insecure
OR
He wants his ego boosted by you giving him some good reasons. Some guys like there ego boosted by compliments and reasons. I'm one of them, but I don't ask questions like that, but some guys probably do.
My girlfriend once said I'm to good for her, she was just insecure about losing me. That never happened though and she finally got over that. So in this case that might be the problem too.
Or maybe he doesn't want you to get too attached? Is it too much too soon? How long have you been together?
Well we have been going out for maybe about 9 months with just a few break ups but I keep telling him that he is one who is good enough for me even though he thinks that he is not good enough.
What are the causes of these break ups? Did you work things out?
I just read another thread and I sense that you're having doubts. Could you give us a little background so we can help you out?
https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...ay-386693.html
Well first it was about him not feeling right about us dating and then it ended up being that he thought that I was going to get upset that he won't spend time with me.
It sounds like you two need to have a talk about what you want out of the relationship. Sounds like maybe you're expecting more from him than maybe he's willing to give? I can't say for sure but that's the feeling I get.
Well we both know what we want but the weird thing is now that I would go and see him at lunch and now he is telling me that I don't have to see him everyday at lunch. Does that mean he is starting to get over me or does it mean he wants to spend more time with his friends?
It takes more than love.Love comes naturally and that is the easy part.
Communication is key,you must be able to discuss the many problems that relationships face over the years by working them out through open honest communication.
Knowing how to compromise and discuss issues is key.Working together through issues creates a bond that is very important.
Having a realistic expectation about the changes your relationship will take is vitally important as well.
The hearts and flowers don't last forever and the passion of the early days (while still there on occasion) is replaced by a deeper and more meaningful love.
You must trust and respect your partner.
Often when we become so familiar with someone we feel O.K. with expressing anything we feel and fail to show respect.
We need to remember that just because we are familiar with someone that does not entitle us to be less than honorable to that person.
You must never take your partner for granted and you should show them your love and appreciation every day!
It takes work and determination and a willingness to be selfless.
Could be either. You should ask him. Communication is very important in a relationship. The best advice I can give you is to ask him the questions you're asking us. It could be that you're making a big deal of nothing, or it could be that you guys aren't feeling the same about the relationship.
Ok cause I try to see him at lunch every day and I try calling him up about 1 or 2 time a week, but the last time I saw him he was actually kissing me
Everyone on this forum can come up with all these reasons/behaviourial shortcomings/psychological analysis about trying to figure out why he's playing with you Christin(some of the people out here are real nice people who care enough to pause and analyse,look for reasons, having gone through such painful incidents in their own lives)but the fact still remains that honestly sweetie,we don't know for sure.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jordan Christin
Why someone behaves the way they are is entirely up to them.We can only guess.But do you want to keep guessing and finding excuses and standing up for him?Ask yourself this,Do you want to put up with bad behaviour that you know keeps hurting you?How about the number of times he lets you down and hurts you?Does he try to find out how you are coping and what you are going through?
Stop analysing so much.By doing that,you have stopped living like a normal,healthy,fun-loving young person and are constantly depending upon him to make something out of your life.If you have a relationship that leads you through the dark alleys of questioning,finding reasons and excuses and feeling heart-broken all the time,is the relationship worth the salt?Would you have put up with any friend who was rude to you or hurt you,then why him?
Once you let go a relationship that stifles you,you'll become freer to find a relationship that gives you your due and brings out the best in you.Trust us on this.We know as we have been there.
That's how manipulator get their way, and that's what he wants, you giving him what he wants.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jordan Christin https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/amhd_i...s/viewpost.gif
But why is he doing that then?
I have always wanted to know something. When you are dating someone, how can you tell if they are starting not to like you anymore?
Thanks for everyone who answers!
It can range from something subtle like they take longer to return your calls or reduce the time they spend with you to something more overt such as fleeing when they see you coming. Tip: change of phone number, a restraining order against you, or them dating someone other than you are also bad signs.
Jordan hi are you asking about the same boyfriend? Or is it a general question?
Just a general question
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